Jane stared at the large cardboard birthday cake in front of him, watching as the lid flew off and a young man stuck his head out.
He stood up and revealed his attire. Suit, tweed jacket, bowtie and elbow patches.
Jane would have thought it was a joke, if not for the surprised faces around him. Looking on in amusement the young man focused on him.
The music that had been playing stopped abruptly as the Doctor smiled. He ran a hand through his hair; it looked like the right place.
"Patrick Jane!" he exclaimed clapping his hands together. "That's a relief, I thought I'd burst out of the wrong cake." He paused. "…again". Third time lucky.
"Actually, that reminds me. There's a girl standing outside in a bikini…can someone let her in… perhaps give her a jumper?" He asked, looking around the room. "Lucy. Lovely girl" he turned his head down and mumbled "Diabetic".
Jane turned to look questioningly at Cho who was passive faced as usual. He shrugged back and turned his attention back to the very strange stranger.
"Now then, Patrick" He clapped his hands again focusing in on the consultant, "We need to talk about Teresa Lisbon". He rested his hands on the cardboard rim of the cake.
Jane felt a rush of confusion sweep through his brain. He'd seen his petite boss only a few hours ago, they'd gone out for a birthday meal, she claiming to be too tired for a party. He was all for staying in watching a movie with her, hopefully catching a few hours' sleep with her in his arms. Not intentionally of course, well that's what he'd tell her at least. So now why was a stranger, who'd just burst from a stripper cake, planning to confide some great secret about her.
The Doctor acknowledged some of the others in the room, tall, imposing, American agents. Most carrying guns. Of all the companion's, this one just had to have a massive crush on him, bigger than any of the others. And this one just happened to have the whole of the California investigation keeping a protective eye on her. Coughing, he mentally pulled himself together. Best just get on with it, reunite true love and be on his way.
"She tried to kiss me!"
He could hear the intake of air from most of the occupants of the room. Noting the gasp from a pretty red head standing behind the Jane. A very pretty red head, in fact once he'd done with…
Oh god! He was getting worse than Jack. Plus he noticed the giant bear of a man standing protectively close to her. Back to the matter in hand.
The Doctor recalled the incident with surprising detail. Teresa pulling at his suspenders, almost ripping a hole in his jacket to get a better look at his chest. Her tongue assaulting his own, pushing him up against the TARDIS with surprising force for a girl of her…well size.
Bringing his thoughts back to the present situation, he attempted to explain himself.
"She kissed me because I was there" he focused on Jane. "It would have been you. It should have been you!" He frowned trying to word it better. "She was frightened, I was frightened. It was a scary situation. But …then we survived and…" he stopped, the rest was pretty self-explanatory. "…tell you what you're a lucky man. She's a great kisser" he raised his hands in a jokey manner.
The Doctor noticed the tension thicken as Jane got up slowly and made his way towards him. "Funny" he chuckled nervously, straightening his bow tie. "How you can say something in your head and it sounds fine". He began moving backwards, not advised in a card board cake, usually it ends in falling out backwards.
Jane was only a few feet away now and the Doctor though this may be the time to panic.
Things really weren't going to plan.
A.N
Another Mentalist/Doctor Who crossover!
This was so good in the show I couldn't get the idea out of my head!
Any way merry Christmas! Or Happy Holidays!
Love Rosie
