A/N: This oneshot is dedicated to Cassie for her birthday today! Happy Birthday Cass I love you! Also if you haven't checked it out yet check out the FanFic Challenge Round 2 on the Chit Chat on Author's Corner forum! It's going to be an awesome challenge! Also take a look at the Song Title Prompt forum! We have some great titles up to choose from and a lot of great stories have been posted on it.
Disclaimer: I don't own CM or the song!
Prompt: State of Mind – Bryan Adams
Emily couldn't take her eyes off of Hotch who was laying so still in the hospital bed. She hasn't left his side at all since she found him in the hospital after Foyet attacked her. She wouldn't talk to anyone and she hasn't ate in the four days she has been here so far. She barely even took her eyes off of Hotch even while he was sleeping or even when he was awake. She just couldn't. She was afraid the minute that she did that he would disappear.
Her heart broke when she witnessed the goodbye between Hotch, Hailey and Jack. At that moment she knew that Hotch was still in love with his ex wife even if he had told her that he loved her. Her heart was broken into a million pieces and she still couldn't bring herself to leave his side. She didn't want to leave his side. Even if his telling her he loved her was a lie she couldn't leave him alone to go through this alone.
She heard him stirring so she turned her eyes away from him. She may look at him periodically when he is awake but she hardly ever looks at him for long. She knew he doesn't understand why she is withdrawn from him but she can't help it. She was heartbroken and sad and she knew it was a state of mind but yet she couldn't snap out of it.
The man she was completely in love with she didn't think loved her as much as she loved him. She could live with that if she hadn't witnessed what she did between Hotch and Hailey and hear the words he said. Her mind wouldn't quit replaying them in her head and she knew that she was going to lose it and lose it soon.
Hotch opened his eyes and the first person he looked for was Emily. He knew that something was up with her but even though she was staying here at the hospital with him she wasn't really with him if that made sense. It made sense to him in his state of mind. He looked at her and saw the unshed tears in her eyes and wondered what had put them there.
He never thought that he would love again after what Haley did to him but he fell hard and fast for Emily. He was more in love with Emily then he was ever in love with Haley. He just wish he knew what was wrong with the woman that he loved. He wished that she would open up to him and tell him what he had done wrong. Because he knew that it had to be something he had done. They were fine until he ended up in here hurt.
He thought about what it was that he could have possibly done and then swore quietly. He knew it must have been what he had said to Haley. He should have thought about how that sounded to other people but he didn't when he said it. Once he finally figured out what it was that put that look in her eyes his heart started to ache because he knew that if she didn't listen to him he would lose her for forever.
"Emily I know you're not talking to me right now and after thinking about it I think I finally figured out what is wrong. When you heard me tell Haley what I did I wasn't telling her that because I wanted to get back to her or because I was still in love with her. I love you Emily and I'm in love with you. I don't want anybody but you. I'm so sorry for what you must have thought. I wish that you would have told me what was wrong instead of withdrawing into yourself. When I told her I'd spend the rest of my life making it up to her I meant that I would spend the rest of my life making it up to her because she had to leave her family. Emily, Haley knows that I'm in love with you and she knows that I want to be with you and only you. Please talk to me Emily. I can't stand this silence." Hotch said. He hoped that she was listening to him. He really meant everything he just said to her.
Emily turned her eyes to Hotch and with one look in his eyes she knew that what he was saying was the truth. She couldn't believe that she had thought everything she had. She walked over to him and bent down and lightly brushed her lips across his before gently sitting on the edge of his hospital bed.
"I'm sorry Aaron. I didn't mean to withdraw like I did. It was the state of my mind and what you said to her just kept running through my head. I'm sorry that I ever doubted you Aaron. I love you." Emily said. She had tears in her eyes as she finished talking.
Aaron gently lifted his arm up and pulled Emily down so that he could stare into her eyes and he said "I'm so sorry Sweetheart. I never thought about how that would sound to you or anyone else. I forgot to tell you that I had told Haley about us and she was happy for me and for us. I love you Emily and I always will."
Emily smiled as she once again leaned in to kiss Hotch. She would never doubt his love for her ever again.
