Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem

Also, spoilers about the Nohr Path.


Kamui sucked in a deep breath as she steadied herself. Her red eyes flickering back and forth, she felt the sharp, familiar tang of fear pass through her. Where am I? she wondered. It felt like…a bed. Kamui sat up abruptly, only to find her mother standing over her. Her dead mother.

"Good morning," her mother whispered, her long, black hair fanning out behind her.

Kamui froze, stuck between terror and joy. She was so happy to see her mother, but her mother was dead. If she was talking to her now, then what did that mean? "Am I dead?" she asked, her voice sounding strangely calm amidst her panic.

Mikoto laughed. "No, you aren't. This is a dream." She beckoned forward, convincing Kamui to stand up.

"W-Why am I here?" Kamui questioned, beginning to feel frustrated.

"We're here to guide you," a familiar voice answered.

Kamui spun around to find her late brother -Ryouma- standing behind her. She looked him in the eye. "Brother Ryouma…"

He smiled at his older sister. "It's me, Kamui. Mother and I are here to help you right the wrongs that have been committed. Only you can do it, Kamui. Between two warring worlds, you are the only link between them; the only source of reason and remorse." He smiled slightly at her. "We need you to go on and save what's left of our homes."

She looked away from him as tears welled in her eyes. "But…your death… It's all my fault," she sobbed. "I could've stopped you."

He put a hand on her shoulder. "I chose to take my own life, Kamui. It was the better option for me. Besides…" He paused for a moment. "I was so blinded by grief and rage. Both at you and at Takumi. At that point, there was no going back. And I thank you for not stopping or wavering. No matter what got thrown towards your path, you overcame it and kept going forward to stop the war."

Together, the three walked slowly outside, where Kamui was met by a swift breeze. It was a lot brighter outside. The trees rustled softly, and the sweet aroma of wildgrass drifted by. The sakura trees slumped over the ground, their branches so heavy with flowers, they were inundated by the sheer numbers. So this is what it's like to be in Hoshido, Kamui thought in awe as a sakura blossom fluttered past. For a moment, she felt a small stab of regret for not choosing Hoshido. Though she belonged in Nohr, she couldn't help but feel envious of the lush environment surrounding her here.

Her thoughts came to a halt as soon as she saw Takumi. "Takumi?!" she shouted, tensing her body.

Takumi smiled sadly and stepped forward. "It's me," he said softly - so soft, the wind almost carried it away.

Kamui swallowed hard, trying to suppress her longing for him. "I thought I'd never see you again. Back in the real world," she swallowed, "you're some kind of monster. You…" She paused as she recalled what had happened right before she fell unconscious. "You broke Yato. You shot it with that strange bow you were using."

Takumi frowned and looked back at the ground. "That isn't me. I was possessed. I'm dead, Kamui," he whispered. "You know that better than anyone else. My body is being controlled and forced to try and kill you."

Kamui embraced him and let her tears fall onto his shoulder. "Don't you understand how much it hurt me when you died?" she choked out through her tears. "I love you so much. How could you go and die on me?"

He put his arm around his lover and sighed. "I don't know what I was thinking. But we can't dwell on that now, Kamui." He offered her his right hand.

Kamui gasped. "The Fuujin Bow!" She looked deep into his eyes. "Takumi, you know I can't use bows. Why would you give this to me?"

He smiled and stroked her cheek gently. "You don't need to worry about it at the moment. Just know that even though I'm not up there with you anymore, I'm still with you down here. Your questions will be answered shortly."

She swallowed slowly as she turned to face her mother and other brother. "Mother, Ryouma…" She smiled. "It's been good seeing you all. But as you've said, I have to go. I have a duty to fulfill." She smiled as she kissed Takumi. "As much as I wish it were so, I can not stay. I love you," she whispered in his ear.

Takumi felt a single tear roll down his cheek before hitting the ground. "Love you too," he replied, surprisingly upset. He had expected to be robbed of any of those sort of feelings after his death. He wasn't real anymore. His body was up there; killing and bringing about mass destruction. Meanwhile, he was stuck down there, forced to watch the love of his life fight against him. In that moment, he remembered what he promised her. "If there were ever a world in which I would raise a hand against you, don't hesitate to kill me. Promise me that." We made that promise together, he thought to himself. He was confused by how sad he was. If he was dead, why did he regret so much? Wasn't death supposed to be an escape from life? He wasn't supposed to feel this pain and sadness. But for some reason, he felt a burning urge to want to stay with Kamui. A burning regret from letting himself die.

Kamui pressed herself against him, desperate to feel his warmth one last time. "I know it'll be many more seasons before I can hope to see you again, but know that I'll keep your warmth in my heart for many seasons to come," she whispered in his ear as she stepped back.

Takumi nodded and looked deep into her eyes as she vanished. Kamui gripped the bow he gave her, now turning into her sword, Yato. She looked up at the rushing light swirling past her. Everyone, I'm coming. She smiled to herself slightly. You too, Takumi. Even if it takes many seasons. She forced her smile away and waited as she felt herself struggle awake.


Kamui let out a small sigh as her body refused to stop trembling. She smiled ruefully to herself as the warm feeling of blood gushed out of the hole in her chest. "Is this how it ends?" she asked herself. Deep within her, some part was screaming in protest. The urge to live was trying to rise up and convince her to struggle. No, she thought to herself, I wanted this. I took that knife and did the deed with my own hands. There's no point in struggling now. Almost as soon as that thought had occurred to her, she felt the fear vanish, to be replaced by calm serenity. I'm sorry I couldn't wait, Takumi, she thought to herself. But…I'm not sorry for what I did. I have nothing here to look forward to. I'll never have kids, never love someone who is still here… Now that my purpose is served, I have nothing to look forward to except you. I love you so much.

She felt a warm presence stir against her dying body. "No," Takumi whispered, "you have so much ahead of you. I don't want this, if it means that you're going to die. I love you too, Kamui," he said softly. "That's why I want to wait for you until the day you came to join me. I don't want you to end all the possibilities now."

"It's too late for that now," she said sardonically as more and more blood pooled around her."I'm sorry if this wasn't the way you wanted it to be. But we can't do anything about that, can we?" She smiled up at the ceiling as her eyes started to shut. "I feel like I'm being cut into a thousand different pieces, each day I'm separated from you. Happiness is foreign to me. I'm sorry if I wasn't strong enough to support the burden," she choked out. It was getting harder to breathe; her chest was bubbling as she struggled to suck in one sweet breath after another. I'm dying, she thought to herself. This day has finally come. She smiled to herself one last time as her consciousness faded to grey.

I always wondered what it would feel like.

Fin


Hmm, I have a few things to say. First off, I'm going to be slowing down more since I've realized that my quality has been steadily declining for a while. I want to be a better writer, not a worse one. So, I won't be updating as often. I need more time to think about what I'm writing and to elaborate on detail. Plus, school's been difficult and I want time to both work on my studies and my fanfiction. Next, I think I'll be working on that Joker x Kamui chapter story. This time, I'm going to be a lot more careful. I'm going to try not to rush. Sometimes, it can be pretty hard, but I really want to write it.

Also, I kinda crossed canons with this fic. It's the Nohr ending, but in this fic, Kamui married Takumi, which isn't possible on the Nohr route. I hate crossing canons, but when I saw how Takumi and Kamui interacted in the last chapter, I just knew i had to write a fic where that happened, but they were married. Don't expect me to cross canons frequently. This is a rare occurrence with my stuff. Anyway, hope y'all enjoy~