A/N: Random one-shot that I wrote at school today and just finished typing up. Will update my other fics soon, I promise! In the meantime, try to read my Lemony Snickt fics, cuz I think they're good! Lol. Here ya go.
It all happened so instantly. In a moment, they were gone, no one left but my notebook and I. I tried to strum the strings on Zack's guitar, but I never could tune it properly. I played Katie's bass until my fingers bled, but it all sounded like trash. I couldn't sing, or play the keyboard or the drums. I'd always been endlessly stuck in the open pages of my notebook, and now it was all that was left, the only reminiscent object to rest my eyes upon. Slowly, I opened the book and flipped through its pages, rediscovering the miles of lists and reminders I'd once jotted down. As I turned the pages haphazardly, something caught my eye: a single page that displayed a poem, instead of minutes from band meetings or the address of our next gig. The page was crinkled, the writing messy, the ink a different color. One page wasn't covered in bright sticky notes, just wrinkles, and a poem from long ago.
Dearest time, takes away from the sorrows
You feel its grace; its wrath; its gentle warnings
It calls you for hours, but still you feel the pain
No time can replace the tears you've shed
He faster, faster still, a steady flow
Keeps it covered, hides the scrape until it's far too late
I wrap the bandages tighter, they make no difference
You're too free to stay trapped, and I cannot change your mind
But if only you'd told me when you felt like dying
And I could have saved your life, the one you left so far behind
I could have saved your life
You would be here right now, but all that remains is the scent of your pillow
I rest my head upon it each night.
The memories stepped out of the fog, and it all became clear. I remembered writing this now. I'd written it when Zack had first gone away. It was more than a year ago, but still it feels so recent. When he left, I felt the ceilings caving in, knew that my life couldn't get much worse. Oh how could I have been so wrong? All Zack did was leave, but he didn't get hurt, not physically anyway. As much as I'd tried to act like all was the same when Zack left, I knew that there was no point in pretending on the day Katie fell. So much was broken, we thought she may never come back to us. They took her somewhere to recover, and she hasn't returned. No phone calls, nothing; she got better and disappeared.
Freddy and I were broken, we'd both lost the ones we cared for more than anything. I guess he couldn't take it, 'cause he ran off looking for her, and I haven't heard from him, either.
Alicia flew to boarding school in London, for reasons she has yet to reveal. Needless to say, two backup singers and a keyboardist wasn't much of a band. For months I scurried around, trying to find replacements, but all attempts were futile. It wasn't long before the rest of them stopped calling, and I was left here, all alone, waiting for Dewey to come by and pick up his prized guitar.
The strange part is that the only one I still talk to is Zack. As far away as he is, he still calls me all the time, emails me every day. We speak to no one else from the band, only each other. For hours we've conversed, sharing secrets that no one else had ever heard. I suppose it comes naturally for us. Funny, after all this time, I haven't fallen in love with him again. It needs to stay this way, us talking on the phone, for I know that if I see him again, I'll never be able to let him walk away when he has to go back. I wish it wasn't so, but it shall be this way for now, probably forever, too.
I heard the doorknob click as Dewey entered the room where we'd once rehearsed so religiously. He nodded toward me, strode brusquely over to his guitar, grabbed it and was halfway out the door before I could bring myself to ask him.
"Do they talk to you?"
He stopped, his hand still on the door. "No," he said quietly, refusing to look me in the eye. "No one says a thing."
I sighed deeply. "So we've really given up, huh? We've finally let the man win?"
"No," he said again, his voice regaining strength. He looked up at me at last. "The man didn't win. He just gave us a choice, and we chose the wrong answer. It's our fault."
"You don't honestly believe that, do you?"
"Summer, it's over!" he suddenly shouted, growing angry. "Get over it and forget them!" He slammed the door and left, a cloud of dust replacing him in the room.
Once again I sighed, sitting down on Freddy's drummer stool. Gently, I clanged the cymbals with my fingernails, filling the room with the tinkering sound. It reminded me of the name they'd once called me. Tinkerbell... Tinkerbell...
I snapped out of my daydream, realizing that the sun was fading fast. Quickly I grabbed my purse and left, just as they'd all left the last times I'd seen them. I locked the door behind me before catching a bus home.
At home, all was quiet. No parents roamed, no televisions blared; all was silent. I dropped my purse in the front hall and slipped out of my coat as I headed to the basement. My computer beeped away quietly, so I left my coat in a heap on the couch and took a seat at my desk. 1 new message... from Zack.
"Hey Sum, how's it going?" it read. "You're not online much lately. Everything okay?"
I smiled and typed a message back: "I'm fine, I just need to catch my breath. You good too?"
"Yeah," he replied. "I'm watching that movie again."
"Oh no, not THAT movie!"
