Regrettable actions.
"I really don't understand you sometimes" Eames laughed sarcastically as he pull his jumper back on. Arthur was sat on the old oak banister of the house that Eames had recently inherited. Arthur wore a sheepish look, he couldn't make his eyes meet any part of Eames.
"look, I'm sorry but you know how I feel!" his yanky accent protruding.
"oh, no I-..you!"Eames turned round to face Arthur with gritted his teeth as he spoke. He wasn't angry, but neither could he process any kind of conversation. His head was swimming in a sea of torture. The way Arthur had pulled and pushed him back forth had almost shattered him.
"just get out" Eames spoke softly with his eyes closed, a hint of defeat in his voice.
"Eames-"
"shut up!" Eames snapped, looking at Arthur once more. "just shut it. You can't do that. I know how you feel? HOW ABOUT HOW I FUCKING FEEL!" Eames yelled at the American regretting his actions immediately. He had never shouted at him before. He looked away again, taking a deep breathe and laugh to calm himself.
Arthur stood up from the bannister and kept his eyes to the ground.
Eames turned around again with a judgemental finger pointed at Arthur.
"you know how I feel, Arthur you know. Why would you- I just can't. Help me understand." he almost pleaded.
"Eames, please. Don't." Arthur said firmly as he finally look Eames in the eyes. Eames began shaking his head. Arthur tried to hid a sigh.
"no. nope." he walked back and forth on the landing. "no please. Help me understand why I have done nothing but love-" he couldn't finish his sentence.
"Eam-"
"you rejected me. And I get let! Believe me I do. That's fair enough. I never stopped loving you. I never did. I was happy to just work with you. To have a friend because its better then nothing. But how FUCKING DARE YOU-" he had to stop himself. Taking a deep breath he tried to recompose himself.
"Eames, I'm sorry I should have never let you-" Arthur was cut off again. If it had been anyone else in any different situation, he would have probably knocked their block off by now.
"no, no , no, no, no"Eames almost sung "no. your not putting this on me. You kissed me. You, you were the one who pushed me up against the wall."
"oh but you didn't exactly stop me though did you" Arthur regained a bit of confidence, in an attempt to defend himself.
"and I have to be responsible for your actions? I really do not understand you, sweat-heart" he used the pet name disjointedly, and in a far less flirty way then usual. "you obviously have feeling for me. Why else would you kiss me like that!"
"it was just a kiss" Arthur said bluntly and bite his tongue as he spoke.
"no. that was not just a kiss"Eames came closer to Arthur and looked him in the eyes. His face quickly sinking from anger and frustration to a deep sadness in his eyes.
"I felt it Arthur and I know you did too" Arthur tried to move his head away but Eames just followed it. Arthur finally looked him back in the eye. The way Eames looked at Arthur made him melt inside. The sad expression on the man who was always so happy and full of jokes. who was poring his heart out; full of sorrow. Had he done this to Eames? They laid their fore heads on each other and Arthur slipped his arms round the Brits waist, hesitantly.
"why can't we do this? What is so wrong?" Arthur didn't reply as Eames put his hand to one of Arthur's cheek, wiping a few tears and stoking the side of his face. Eames spoke softly;
"we have nothing to lose and only the world to gain"
