Ok, so this is the sequel to "In Control" by Rainbowz95. I read it because I was curious, and I have been tormented by it ever since. My mind just had to find some way to try and redeem Astrid. So this is the outcome.
P.S. I sugest you read "In Control" first.
Letting Go of Control
When she said that she felt no regret, she wasn't being completely honest. She felt regret for the way his eyes held fear, because of her. She felt even more regret when the fear turned to disgust, then to anger, and then to resentment. But she still was proud of herself for getting what she wanted. Not so much for how, but it was the end result that mattered, right? Still, she couldn't help bragging to Ruffnut about how she finally got what she had wanted. Ruffnut was unusually quiet during the entire story. She thought to herself, This is not good. Astrid shouldn't be this proud. Hiccup won't forget this. Then Astrid's parents came in with solemn looks on their faces.
"Astrid we have some… bad news."
Well, however bad it was, it couldn't wipe off her proud smile.
"We don't know why, and Hiccup refuses to give his reasons, but… the engagement… it's… it's been… it's been called off."
So much for keeping her proud smile on. She looked at her parents, dumbfounded. "C-called off?"
They nodded their heads. "We're so sorry."
Behind her Ruffnut whispered sadly, "Now how proud are you?" And she walked off followed quickly by her parents.
It took a minute for her parent's and Ruffnut's words to sink in, but when they did, it hit her like a war hammer. She wasn't getting married. She had sacrificed everything for a few moments of pleasure and now she was paying the price. Now that she really reflected on the events last night, she realized that they hadn't been that great, not when the only one enjoying it was herself. She remembered Hiccup's words to her. "Look at you. You're pathetic." And she was. She had forced him to do something that he didn't want to do and she had forced him by threatening his life. Not verbally or physically, but the threat was there, none the less.
She thought he had forgiven her. But now that she looked back, she realized that she was a fool to think that. His words, his actions, and even the looks he gave her, said plainly that he was disgusted with and resented her. When she had tried to cuddle with him, he gave her a cold shoulder. And now that she thought about how she handled the situation, she couldn't help but be a little disgusted with herself too.
She had to apologize. She had to try and right this.
As she walked through the village, she felt extremely self-conscious about herself. But no one gave her disapproving glances or stared. She remembered what her parents said to her. "…don't know why… Hiccup refuses to give his reasons…" Even after all she had done to him, he still was being noble and trying to save her the humiliation. What had she done? She had given up the best, most honorable, kindest person of the entire island, and for what? For a moment of pleasure. Why? Because she couldn't let go of her selfishness. What had she ever done to deserve him in the first place? She just hoped that he would forgive her.
Finally she reached the forge. "Hello, Astrid."
"Hey, Gobber. Is Hiccup here?"
"No. I think he's at his house. He called the day off. Said he need time to be left alone."
"Thank you."
When she had finally reached his house, she had rehearsed her apology many times. She knocked on the front door.
"Come in," replied a cold, icy voice.
When she entered she noticed two things. One was that Hiccup was sitting with Toothless by the fire. Two, was when Toothless saw her, his pupils became slits and he gave her a low, threatening growl. She was surprised. He hadn't growled at her since the first time they met. And that hadn't been so… angry.
With a hand on his snout, Hiccup calmed his dragon down. "What do you want?" Hiccup ground out.
"Hiccup, I'm so sor-"
"Save it," he said, and looked at her. Never before had she seen a look of (she honestly, didn't ever expect such a look from Hiccup, especially directed at her) hatred so intense on his face. "It's too late to apologize."
"Hiccup, please. I was drunk and-"
"And that's an excuse!"
"No, but-"
"But nothing! You knew I was waiting till after our marriage to take that step. And you deliberately forced it on me anyway!"
"You could have refused!"
"Oh yeah, right! I'm totally going to fight the girl I was in love with since I was nine."
The was in that statement could not have been made clearer.
"Not to mention that you made it pretty clear that if I refused, you would make sure I didn't live to see another day!"
Astrid remained silent, lowering her head in shame, trying to hold back the tears.
"You could have talked to me or, better yet, waited just a few weeks. Then we would have been married and none of this would have happened. But nooo, you had to go and get drunk and do… THAT to me. And I can't stand by someone, for the rest of my life, that would put their own pleasure before my life."
The look of betrayal on Hiccup's face was too much and Astrid broke down. Just the thought of living without Hiccup was enough to fuel the torrent of tears running down her face.
Hiccup fought the urge to run up to her and hold her and tell her everything would be alright. Because they wouldn't. She had broken his trust. He didn't know if it was even possible to repair it.
"Hiccup, I'm so, so sorry. I didn't think. I put myself and my desires before you. I wish with all my heart that I could go back and undo what I did. I don't know if you will or even if you can, but I am begging you to forgive me. I don't know what I would do without you. "
Hiccup looked at her. She never apologized, ever. She would rather be wrestling a flaming Nightmare than apologize, so she must be serious. He turned to Toothless, who knew exactly what he was going to ask without even making a sound. And the look he gave Hiccup answered his question. Actions speak louder than words. Hiccup sighed, then nodded.
Turning back to Astrid, he said two words that would send her on a path of maturity to try and fulfill his challenge.
"Prove it."
So, yeah. My tormented mind is finally at ease (even though Astrid is still in trouble). If you guys want me to continue this then please tell me in a review. If enough people want this, then I will.
Thank you all. Keep writing!
