Sally Wainwright, in conjunction with Sarah Lancashire and Nina Sosanya (no one could have predicted that incredible 'chemistry'), generously gave us something very beautiful in the form of the wonderful pairing of Kate and Caroline and their significance as a lesbian couple must not be underestimated because, as well as just their pure gorgeousness, they gave us visibility and recognition in a way that has never been done before. We have clung on tenaciously to Kate and Caroline through all their ups and downs, however, rightly or wrongly, Ms Wainwright has chosen to callously, cruelly and permanently rip this couple asunder leaving me, and many, many others I am sure, feeling bereft and betrayed. Harsh words I know but I can't help the way I am feeling at the moment. I am grieving for the loss of them but writing this story has helped me and I thought that perhaps reading it may help others in some small way. I know it won't bring Kate and Caroline back to us and I have no idea if it's going to work but one can only try. This story is not without issues but it is without the death of either of our lovely couple. I would have preferred episode 4 to go something along the lines of the following…..

A Gift of Life

Chapter One

Kate had been awake since the early hours of the morning answering her baby's needy cries but, fortunately, after a feed, a nappy change and some patient mothering she had been able to gradually coax her daughter back to sleep. Now, still in her pyjamas, Kate sat cross-legged on the bed with the infant lying beside her, supported on both sides by cushions and her tiny hand clasped possessively around Kate's finger, still peaceful for the time being. Kate looked down at the tiny perfect body, totally enamored but with remnants of disbelief that they had both so miraculously survived their recent life-threatening trauma as victims of a callous hit-and-run accident. Over the ensuing weeks death had been so close at times, a welcome comfort even, as each had struggled with their agonies but each had then resolutely clung to life.

Sensing the absence of her wife next to her in their bed, Caroline had also awoken and was now showered and dressing for work. It was her first day back as Head Teacher of Sulgrave Heath Independent School since Kate's accident almost two months prior and she had to admit to harbouring mixed feelings about resuming her duties. On the one hand she was looking forward to returning to the job and back to what felt familiar; to the challenges she was certain she could meet, and to where she was confident that she had the control and power; to the routine and general predictability of a school day with its scheduled meetings and bells signalling when things were to begin and end, unlike the confusion that had reigned over her life for the past two months. On the other hand, she was reluctant to leave Kate on her own for an entire day. She had come devastatingly close to losing her so her instinct now was to protect and support the woman she loved as well as their child. The thought of not being able to do that while she was at work tempered her anticipation with concern and drew a worried frown to her face.

For the days following the accident and the emergency operations, firstly to deliver the baby and then to repair as best they could Kate's battered body, Caroline had watched on helplessly as her wife lay in an induced coma in order to reduce the shock to her system from all it had been through. For days none of the hospital staff had been willing to assure her that Kate would survive. The most they would commit to was that they were doing their best and there was nothing further Caroline, or any of them, could do at the moment but wait and see. Likewise, the baby had been taken to a ward where she was put in an incubator and cared for around the clock by a team of nurses specifically trained in the intricate job of caring for premature infants. There was little Caroline could do here either but peer teary-eyed through the glass window as the fragile figure, attached to life through tendrils of tubes, fought on so bravely. It had been this powerlessness, this dependence on others to make all well, a helplessness to control fate that Caroline had found most torturous.

Both in a serious condition, Kate's and the baby's time in hospital had been fraught with many anxious moments with Caroline having to make several emergency dashes to be at one or the other's bedside in case the unthinkable happened but, against all odds, both mother and daughter had battled their way back and eventually recovered sufficiently to be sent home. That had been three weeks ago and now Kate had convinced Caroline that she was strong enough to take care of herself and the baby on her own and that Caroline should consider going back to work.

Caroline had agonised over the decision for days, her fear of not being there if Kate needed her over-riding her yearning for the mental stimulation and challenges that her job gave her. However, Kate knew that now she was up to the demanding task of motherhood, her partner would soon become bored and steadily go bonkers staying at home all day every day and thus insisted that, for the sake of everyone's sanity, she return to work so here she was on a Monday morning putting the final touches to her make-up before heading off to Sulgrave Heath.

From the reflection in the mirror Caroline watched as Kate's eyes turned from the delight that was their daughter to look over at her. It seemed she had decided something.

"Flora," Kate declared with a sense of satisfaction.

Dubious. "Really?"

"Don't you like it?"

Non-committal. "It's…ah…up to you."

Disappointed by Caroline's lack of enthusiasm, Kate asked, "Isn't it up to both of us?'

She desperately wanted her partner to be more than a neutral bystander in the naming of their child.

"Yes, of course," Caroline agreed, "but you're the…you know…you've got more say in the matter."

"You've got to like it," Kate insisted.

"I don't dislike it."

"Flora Grace."

Unsure. "Okay."

"You don't sound thrilled."

"No, I am." Her words were affirming but her manner unconvincing particularly to Kate who was finely tuned to the nuances of Caroline's voice and body language.

Keen to have the matter settled and wanting Caroline's input, Kate asked, "Well, what would you call her?"

"I like that name…it's sweet," Caroline replied momentarily mustering a bit more enthusiasm. "Good," she added with a certain amount of finality when there was no immediate response. She hoped that the matter was now settled.

Even Caroline didn't fully understand why she was being quite so disinterested but she just couldn't seem to control it. For reasons that escaped her, she found a need to distance herself. She hadn't thought about names as she had been too distraught at first, then too tired, physically and emotionally spent, and finally, too numb to even contemplate names and then there was the other thing that niggled at the back of her brain. She knew it was foolish and, as things had turned out, it probably didn't matter so much, but it played on her mind nonetheless. When it was uncertain, unlikely even, that Kate would pull through from her operation, the tiny burr of a thought that had burrowed itself deep in Caroline's mind and lay dormant during the months of Kate's pregnancy worked its way to the surface. She could lay no legal claim to the baby whom they had considered to be their daughter. Surely Greg, the biological father, or Kate's mum would have more of a claim on her than Caroline should something happen to Kate. Caroline wasn't sure she could invest so much emotional energy into a child only to face the possibility of having her ripped from her arms.

On those recent occasions when she had been forced to consider the possibility of losing Kate, it was as though her heart, battered and bleeding, had been bound in her chest with barbed wire. There was a constant gnawing in her stomach that made her want to retch endlessly. Nothing could ease that agonising ache that threatened to tear her apart. Caroline didn't think she could bear to go through that crippling sense of loss again so she could feel herself pulling away from the baby….she didn't want to but at the same time she was powerless to stop it.

"So you don't like it?" Kate would always know what she was thinking no matter her words.

"I do…like I say…it's growing on me…it suits her…well, it suits her now…but will it suit her when she's fourteen and has got …opinions?"

"I really like it," Kate persisted.

"Well then, that's what matters."

"I think you're just saying that."

"I wouldn't do that." Caroline tried to keep the sound of slight exasperation from creeping into her voice. "If I thought it was really abhorrent I would say so."

"As opposed to mildly abhorrent?"

Caroline didn't want to have an argument now. She needed to focus on getting to work.

"Kate, we're calling her Flora… Flora…Flora Grace." Then, before she could contain it, she added, "There's the margarine called Flora, of course."

"You've put me off it now."

"No, I haven't."

Sensing a touch of condescension, Kate replied, "Don't talk to me like that, that's how men talk." She then took the sting out of her words a little by continuing more gently, "So you like Grace?'

"I like Flora." Caroline wasn't sure that she did but she liked that Kate liked it and that was enough for her.

"You really don't. It's obvious."

With a dismissive shrug of her shoulders Caroline gave up. "She's your baby."

Once her make-up was done to her satisfaction, Caroline fetched her bag and slung its strap over her shoulder ready to leave. Kate unfolded her legs, rose from the bed and reached out, managing to catch Caroline in a loose embrace, her arms encircling Caroline's waist and pulling her in close. Melting brown eyes peered into Caroline's face as, with a serious edge to her voice, Kate whispered, "She's our baby….yours and mine….we are, all three of us, equal parts of this equation."

Usually Kate's words would have smoothed the troubled waters but today Caroline was not so easily appeased. She wasn't sure if it was nerves or something else lurking in the recesses of her mind.

"But you're the….I'm noth…"

Realising the can of worms her words would open, Caroline bit her sentence off there. There wasn't time to go into this now as she didn't want to be late on her first day back but she was aware that she would have to deal with this feeling eventually. Instead, she leaned in and kissed her wife carefully on the lips not wanting to smear the lipstick she had just meticulously applied.

"I'd better go and see if Lawrence has bothered to get ready," she suggested as she cupped Kate's chin in her hand and lightly brushed her thumb across the bottom lip of her mouth, ostensibly to wipe away the faint smudge of colour that was left there but also to secure the feel and shape of its soft fullness in her memory. Since the accident Caroline had found herself doing this constantly, storing away mental photographs of everyday moments that suddenly seemed so precious…images of Kate stretched out languidly on the sofa reading, Kate smiling her broad, perfect smile as she nursed her baby or perhaps frowning as she stubbornly attempted what seemed like the impossible task of assembling the new cot, refusing to allow it to defeat her. These were all fleeting moments but Caroline wanted to keep them forever. At times she would test herself and see if she could draw upon particular images, afraid that one day they would be all she had. When faced with the very real prospect of losing Kate, it had frightened her how much of their time together she had taken for granted and glossed over without paying attention to detail. Along with the images, she also attempted to memorise the soothing sound of Kate's voice as she quietly sang to calm the baby or her bubbly laugh that Caroline found to be so infectious; the taste of her kisses and her sex; the scent of her skin fresh from the shower and after they had made love. It often frustrated Caroline that it was almost impossible to do to her satisfaction.

"Right, I'd better get going….I'll call you later….You will promise to ring me if you need me won't you? For anything."

"I'll… We'll be fine."

"Promise me," Caroline insisted. She wasn't going anywhere without that assurance.

"Sure," Kate answered with an amused smile, touched by Caroline's protectiveness.

Satisfied that her request would be followed, Caroline stepped to the side of the bed, leaned over and plied several soft kisses to their daughter's forehead.

"I'll see you later little….Flora Grace."

Caroline decided then and there that the name did indeed appeal to her.

After a quick glance at her watch, Caroline did a final check that she had everything that she needed and then made a dash for the stairs.

As Kate turned her attentions back to her daughter, she heard her wife's voice calling out to Lawrence and, soon after, the sound of the Jeep's tyres on the gravel as Caroline reversed it down the drive.

"What do you think of Flora Grace?" Kate asked the sleeping infant as she tested out the sound of the name once again. "I think you love it, don't you? What will we do today now that we've been left to our own devices?"

oooOooo

"What's wrong?" Caroline asked her son as she steered the Jeep along the familiar route to Sulgrave Heath.

They had been on the road for over ten minutes and Lawrence, who was normally nattering away by now, hadn't uttered a single word. When Caroline glimpsed over to gauge if there was a problem she noted the petulance on her son's face, a sure sign, she had learned, that trouble was fermenting just below the surface.

"Nothing," he replied fobbing off his mother's concern.

How could he explain to her without hurting her feelings that the last two months at school had probably been the best of his school life? He hadn't had to wear the taunts of the other students about his mother being the Head Teacher and more recently, a lesbian, for nearly two glorious months. He had been just a regular student. It appeared that it was very much a case of 'out of sight, out of mind' as the teasing had virtually disappeared over the course of her absence. He was convinced that with her return it would all fester up again and he wasn't sure he could continue to take it on the chin.

"Something's up," Caroline persisted, "you haven't said a word since we left home and I can all but see the storm cloud brewing."

"I want to go live with my dad."

Maybe if he distanced himself from her, his problems would fade. Lately, he'd constantly felt like that inconvenient third wheel, an afterthought. Everything seemed to focus on Kate and the baby and he was invisible.

Stunned by Lawrence's announcement but taking care not to lose concentration on her driving, it was Caroline's turn to go silent for a moment.

"Why?" she finally asked, trying to remain composed.

"Well, you've got Kate and the baby and dad's got…he's got no one."

Although touched by what she sensed was Lawrence's genuine concern for his father, Caroline had no confidence in John's parenting capabilities. She also understood her son well enough to know that he would take full advantage of his father's lackadaisical approach to discipline and school.

"Lawrence, I want us to be a family….you, me, Will, Kate and the baby….by the way, we're naming her Flora…Flora Grace….Just because Kate and the baby are there it doesn't mean I love you any less….I don't ….Because of the accident I've had to ….you know…take care of things….but Kate is well now and things will soon settle."

Lawrence shrugged his shoulders.

"I want to live with my dad," he repeated sullenly.

Caroline slowed down and indicated as she approached the entrance to the school. As she turned in she noticed that the signage at the front of the grounds still read "Dr Caroline Elliot". She made a mental note to have that changed to "Dr Caroline McKenzie-Dawson" as a priority.

"What does your dad think?" Caroline asked with as much calm and restraint as she could muster while she pulled into her specified parking spot.

"He'll be cool with it," was Lawrence's reply, his excitement growing as he dared to think that his mother may possibly be considering the idea.

"So you haven't mentioned it to him yet?"

"He'll be fine."

Caroline removed her car keys from the ignition and reached over for her handbag from the floor at Lawrence's feet.

"We'll talk about it tonight….Have a good day….Behave."

Excited at the prospect of perhaps going to live with his father, Lawrence took off at a run to where he could see Angus waiting for him at the top of the steps. Quelling her nerves, Caroline proceeded to enter the building at a slower, more dignified pace and make her way along the hallway and up the staircase to her office, noting with private amusement how the easily recognisable and assertive echo of her heels on the polished floor caused the turn of surprised heads at her unexpected arrival. It wouldn't take long for word of her return to spread throughout the school and for behaviours to adjust accordingly. In her absence, Mr Harrison had filled in as best he could but Dr McKenzie-Dawson's mere presence would always lift the bar that extra notch.

As Caroline was about to enter her office she heard the familiar sound of her admin assistant's voice calling out to her.

"Caroline! It's good to see you. How's Kate? And the baby? "

"Morning Beverley. They're good…fine…yes."

"Can I get you some tea? I think Alison has just made a fresh pot."

"Oh, has she? Oh good...ah…yes, thank you."

"I'll get that sorted and then I'll run through the day's schedule with you."

"Yes….good."

Caroline continued on into her office where she discarded her coat and hung it on the stand, along with her bag. She removed her phone from her coat pocket and made her way to her desk where she found a rather disorderly pile of files and notes that had been left by Mr Harrison. It was beyond Caroline's comprehension as to how people could function properly and do their job efficiently surrounded by such a mess and instinctively she began to create some order from the chaos, quickly sorting through and prioritising each task.

It was as she reached the bottom of the pile of papers that her mind drifted back to thoughts of Kate. She located her phone and toyed with the idea of calling her, wanting to hear the reassuring sound of her voice. As she flicked through the contact screen for Kate's number she looked at her watch and saw that it was barely 9 o'clock. She'd been away less than an hour. Kate would think she was paranoid if she called so soon. She put the phone down again. Her eyes wandered towards the door to her office to see if Beverly was coming with the tea and again her memories took her back.

After witnessing how truly happy her mother was after rekindling a lost love and then having to deal with the possibility that it could all be snatched away in an instant, Caroline had done some deep soul-searching and admitted to herself that the one person who could bring her the same kind of happiness was a woman…Kate McKenzie…. and there wasn't time to waste with denials. The sense of relief that came with this realisation was exhilarating and it had been here in her office that she had taken the initiative and shown the Modern Languages teacher just how much she desired her. Caroline recalled with almost illicit pleasure how she had clasped Kate's apprehensive face in her hands then kissed her wantonly as she used her own body to press Kate up against the door before audaciously slipping her hand inside the woman's bra. Caroline couldn't help but smile as she recalled the feel of that breast, fantastically heavy, fantastically hard at the tip.

A sharp rap on the door jolted Caroline back from her daydreaming.

"Tea," Beverley announced as she placed the steaming mug on Caroline's desk.

"Ah….Thank you."

Beverley then consulted her notebook.

"Mr Harrison has requested a meeting with you at 9:30am to catch you up to speed on everything so I've allowed an hour for that…..you should be over it by then…. and then at 10:45am you're seeing Cressida Wade's parents….here's her file."

Beverley placed a disappointingly thick manila folder in front of Caroline.

"Right."

"At break," Beverly continued, "there's the HOD meeting and then first thing after lunch you're teaching….9F…Maths."

"Good God…am I?"

Beverly checked her notepad to make sure she hadn't forgotten to mention anything and then said, "That's everything I think so I'll leave you to it, shall I?" She turned to leave but, at the last minute, she gave Caroline a genuine smile and added, "It's good to have you back."

Caroline answered with a smile of her own. "Thank you…Oh and Beverley there's just one more thing….Would you arrange to have the sign at the entrance to the school amended to 'Dr Caroline McKenzie-Dawson' ASAP?"

"Sure."

As Beverley departed, Caroline picked up her phone and once again contemplated ringing Kate. It really was too soon to call but Caroline decided that a text message would be an acceptable alternative. She had a couple of minutes before Mr Harrison landed in her office so what better way to spend that time.

Her fingers rapidly jived over the screen. She re-read her message….. "I love you with all my heart"…..and then pressed 'send'.

It was as Mr Harrison gave a cursory knock on the door and then entered that Caroline's phone buzzed, alerting her to an awaiting message. She fleetingly considered ignoring it, not wanting to appear impolite in front of her colleague, but instantly changed her mind. It was a reply from Kate and when she opened it there was a fresh image of Kate and Flora obviously out in the garden, each beautiful face beaming at her and with the message below… "And we love you". Instantly Caroline felt her heart inflate like a balloon and she couldn't contain the smile that spread across her face.

Mr Harrison mistakenly thought the smile was meant for him and replied with his own toothy grin. Caroline didn't bother to explain or inform him differently.

"Welcome back, Dr…"

Caroline helped him out. "McKenzie-Dawson."

"Right….It's good to have you back although I think you'll find things have run quite smoothly while you've been away."

The man was fishing for a compliment. He'd have to try harder than that.

"Thank you, James. Why don't you have a seat?"

Caroline ushered the tall, gangling figure over to one of the chairs at her meeting table and then took the seat at the head.

oooOooo

The first thing Kate had decided she would do that morning was to take advantage of her daughter being asleep to shower and prepare for the day ahead.

As she stood in the shower allowing the hot water to stream over her body, its heat soothing the dull ache that still persisted within her muscles, she ran a dark finger along the fresh scar on her belly, the site of the incision the doctors had made in order to rescue her daughter from her damaged, failing body. It hadn't been the birth she had been preparing for and she struggled with the fact that she hadn't been conscious as her daughter was brought into the world but she consoled herself with the fact that, despite the odds being heavily stacked against them, they had both managed to survive and she now had the two things she had desperately wanted for so long, a thriving baby girl and Caroline.

The beginnings of a cry jarred her from her thoughts. Kate turned off the water and quickly towelled herself dry then returned to the bedroom to look in on her daughter who was now wide awake and winding up to a full blown howl. Kate gently picked her up and held her next to her bare flesh as she rocked her in her arms and kissed each soft cheek, soothing her with words of comfort. At moments like this when her baby cried so pitifully Kate wondered if the harrowing way in which she had been brought into the world had affected her. Was she remembering? Was she in pain? When Kate had voiced her concerns to Caroline, her partner had assured her that their daughter would have no recollection of what had happened and it was perfectly normal for a baby to cry like that but Kate couldn't completely assuage her feelings of guilt. Parents were supposed to protect their children from such harm. She knew it was a ridiculous notion. She had taken all the care she possibly could and the cause of the accident lay entirely in the hands of the delinquents who had stolen a car and were mindlessly joy riding but she couldn't quite wash away the thought of how different things might have been if she had left the shop as soon as she had purchased the milk rather than stopping to chat to the store owner for a minute or two or if she hadn't put off going back inside to buy the newspaper she had forgotten.

As the baby's cries subsided, Kate placed her back on the bed just long enough to get dressed. She then took her into the newly-painted nursery where she bathed her and gave her a fresh nappy and clothes before carrying her down to the kitchen where she could prepare a bottle for her as well as her own breakfast.

Just as Kate made her way down the stairs the phone in her pocket rang and gave a buzz. There was a message from Caroline. When she opened it the words on the screen brought a broad smile to her face. Knowing how much her wife loved her never failed to leave her feeling quite 'something else'…exhilarated. She often thought that it would be almost possible for her to live and breathe from that love alone and she knew for certain that she couldn't live without it.

Kate diverted from her path to the kitchen and headed into the backyard just long enough to take a photo of herself nursing Flora in their favourite spot, the garden seat, which she then sent to Caroline with an equally affectionate message.

Back inside, Kate nestled Flora securely in the swing seat they had bought for her and placed it where the baby could see her or at least sense her presence but, more importantly, Kate could keep a watchful eye on the infant. With her baby distracted by the colourful shapes and baubles that hung in front of her and content with the world for the moment, Kate went about preparing the formula for the bottle until she was disrupted with a start by the sudden sound of a voice echoing from the hallway.

"Morning, love."

Recognising Celia's voice, Kate replied, "Oh… Morning, Celia," as she continued with what she was doing.

"I hope you don't mind me popping in like this….I just thought I'd pay a visit and see how you were getting along…well, actually, between you, me and the gate post, Caroline made me promise last night that I'd keep an eye on you…you know…make sure you were coping…she was worried about you …what, with her going back to work and all…so this is me keeping my word…then I'll be out of your hair."

Although it had appeared that Caroline's relationship with her mother had disintegrated beyond repair when Celia had obstinately refused to attend their wedding, all hostilities had been instantly forgotten with the accident. It had been Celia who had immediately rushed to her daughter's side to provide the love and support Caroline so desperately needed during that dire time when Kate's condition hung tentatively in the balance. With her nerves stretched to their limit and her emotions rubbed raw, Caroline had relied heavily on her mother to help her make it through from one dreadful day to the next. It would have taken too much energy...energy she didn't have to spare...to do otherwise.

"Can I get you a cup of tea?" Kate asked amicably. It hadn't come as a total surprise that Caroline had sent her mother in to do reconnaissance.

"That would be lovely…thanks," Celia replied as she sat herself one of the kitchen stools. "Where's the baby….my grand-daughter."

Kate's heart skipped a beat. It was the first time she'd heard Celia refer to the baby as her grand-daughter. She couldn't wait to tell Caroline.

"I'm about to fetch her and give her a bottle," Kate replied.

"You go and feed her and I'll make the tea," Celia offered as she slid off the stool and made for the electric jug.

Celia had decided that she quite liked Kate and figured that if Caroline had to be like that she could have done a lot worse.

Kate gave Celia a grateful smile and an unexpected peck on the cheek as she took the bottle and headed for the living room, fetching Flora on the way.

It wasn't long after Kate had settled comfortably on the sofa and had begun feeding her daughter that Celia joined them in the living room, a mug of tea in each hand. She put one of the mugs on the coffee table in front of Kate and then settled herself into the nearby armchair to sip her own brew.

"We've decided on a name for her….well, at least I think we have…I like it and Caroline says she likes it but I'm not so sure she does," Kate began.

"Have you? What have you decided to call her?"

"Flora…Flora Grace," Kate announced happily but a little hesitantly as she waited to hear Celia's opinion which would no doubt be forthcoming.

"Why that's beautiful…Flora Grace…it suits her…Never mind Caroline…she'll tell you if she doesn't like it."

Kate gave Celia a look of relief before asking, "Where's Alan?"

"He's back in the flat speaking to Gary on the phone," Celia answered with a dramatic roll of her eyes, "He's trying to talk his way out of going to another tedious football match….I've as much as said that if he can't get out of it he'll be going on his own…I'll not be going."

"I'm not much of a football fan either," Kate confided.

"To be honest with you, I'd rather visit the dentist than attend another one of those dreary matches…what a waste of a day."

Kate sensed that Celia was getting worked up and decided a change of subject was needed.

"How are the plans for your holiday coming along? Where exactly are you going?"

"We've booked the plane tickets ….we're going to New Zealand first to see Alan's brother, Ted, and all his family and then we're on to Australia…I have a friend in Toowoomba, just left of Brisbane."

"Wow… sounds exciting," Kate exclaimed and then added their bit of news, "Caroline and I thought we might go to New York at Christmas time to visit my mum but we haven't made any firm plans yet."

"That will be nice, love," Celia replied as she stood and collected the empty mugs and headed for the kitchen, "although travelling with babies is always a bit of a chore."

Celia rinsed the mugs and left them to drain.

"I'll be off now but don't hesitate to call out if you need anything…we'll be in most of the day," Celia offered as she stood by Kate's side and gently stroked the baby's fine, dark hair. "Bye then, little Flora Grace."

With her hunger sated and the wind removed, Flora had drifted off to sleep. Being careful not to disturb her, Kate placed the tiny figure back in the swing seat with the intention of making herself something to eat but no sooner had she started towards the kitchen when there was a sharp, impatient knock at the door.

Kate's mood shifted as she opened it and recognised the form standing there.

"John," she said frostily.

"Oh, hello….I've come to see…is my wi…is Caroline in?"

Kate instantly felt the hackles on the back of her neck rise in annoyance.

"No…my wife is out at the moment," she retorted, infuriated by his stubborn refusal to accept that he and Caroline had been divorced for quite a while and Caroline was now happily married to her.

"Oh, I see….Can I come in?" he persisted as he stepped forward fully expecting to be allowed to enter, however, Kate held her ground.

"There's no point. Caroline won't be home until much later this afternoon and it's not convenient right at the moment," she replied as she steadfastly blocked the doorway.

She'd had just about as much as she could stand of this complete tosser insinuating himself into their lives.

"John, you need to stop turning up here without calling first. It's not polite. "

"But this is my hou…."

"No, we bought you out. Remember?"

"Yes, I know but….."

"But what, John?" Kate set her jaw and glared at him with eyes as hard as flint.

"Will you tell Caroline I called?" he replied dejectedly but Kate was not falling for his hangdog look.

"What? And spoil her day? I don't think so, John."

Realising that he had quite possibly worn out his welcome, John thrust his hands into his pockets, turned on his heels and walked sulkily towards his car. Kate closed the door on the retreating figure and exhaled a puff of air from her cheeks in exasperation. The man was a complete jerk but for once she hadn't been daft enough to feel sorry for him.

oooOooo

Caroline had been consumed by the business of her day and was surprised when Lawrence turned up in her office to wait for her to drive them home.

"Mum, it's after four o'clock," he complained, "Time to go."

"Yes, alright," Caroline answered, "I'll finish this and then we'll go…I'll be ten minutes….Why don't you take the keys and wait in the car?"

Seeing that as a better option than hanging around in his mother's office, Lawrence located the keys in Caroline's bag and took off with a final, "Don't be long."

Caroline flicked through the last few pages of the report she had been reading, signed half a dozen forms, did one more check of her emails and then shut down her computer for the day. Within the promised ten minutes she had her coat and bag and was ready to leave. Noticing the time, she was suddenly anxious to be home with Kate and the baby.

As she approached her car she handed her bag to Lawrence to put at his feet and then walked around to the driver's side. Before she could get in, her eye was caught by some marks on the car door. Someone had etched the word 'dyke' into the first layer of paint. Determined not to allow anyone the satisfaction of seeing her angry and not wanting to upset her son, Caroline kept her displeasure tightly under control as she got into her car and drove off.

The trip to and from Sulgrave Heath was a relatively short one, twenty minutes tops, but it seemed to Caroline that although the wheels of her jeep were spinning they weren't getting any closer, or at least, not quickly enough for her liking. From out of the blue a sense of panic struck as she felt her heart begin to pound in her chest and her breathing become shallow and erratic. Was Kate alright? Irrationally, all the things that could possibly go wrong, all the accidents that could possibly happen began to race through her mind. She had a white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel and had to fight the urge to press the accelerator closer to the floor. What if Kate or the baby weren't there? If only she was home to see that they were unharmed.

It was only when she finally pulled into the driveway of 46 Conway Drive that Caroline was able to draw a deep, calming breath. She quickly gathered her things and made for the door, sorting through her keys with anxious fingers as she did so but she was halted in her tracks by Lawrence who called out to her.

"Mum, have you seen this?"

She turned to see Lawrence's mortified expression as he pointed out the word scrawled on the car door.

"Ah…yes…I did notice it but don't worry, it's easily fixed," Caroline replied dismissively as she didn't want a fuss. "And don't worry…I will find out who did it."

She had been through so much recently, her world had been rocked to its core, so that a few scratches on her car, in the real scheme of things, was insignificant although, as she had promised Lawrence, she would eventually find the culprits responsible for it and give them a thorough lesson on why homophobia is totally unacceptable and if they thought they were going to use her sexuality as a stick to beat her or her family with in the misguided belief that she'd take it lying down then they were seriously mistaken. For now, however, she had more important things on her mind.

Lawrence watched disbelievingly as his mother disregarded the slur and continued towards the house apparently unconcerned.

Just as Caroline was about to put her key in the lock, the door opened. Kate stood in the doorway, a picture of health, greeting her with a warm smile. Caroline hadn't realised it but she had been holding her breath. The sight of Kate safe and sound was a signal for her to breathe again as relief raced through her veins like a shot of adrenaline.

Suddenly a weak "Hi" was all she could manage as she choked back the lump forming in her throat. Unexpected tears welled up and threatened to spill catching her completely off guard as she struggled to hold them at bay, unable to fully explain their presence. She'd only been gone for a few hours. She was being ridiculous or so she felt.

To hide her embarrassment and to buy some time to regain her composure, Caroline walked into the hallway where she tossed her keys into the bowl on the small antique table and then took her time to remove her coat and hang it on its hook. As she did so Kate moved in behind her and settled her arms around Caroline's waist, pressing her lips against the nape of her partner's neck in a flurry of light kisses. The flutter of her warm breath causing goose bumps to rise on Caroline's skin as she whispered, "I missed you today."

In one smooth movement Caroline turned to face her wife, slipping her arms around her neck and tugging her gently forward so as to feel the reassuring press of their bodies together. Their eyes met briefly before Caroline hungrily claimed Kate's full, inviting mouth with her own in several, short eager kisses, plying them feverishly until her qualms were eased and until both women sank into longer, more languid kisses. Caroline placed a hand on Kate's chest and could feel the now strong beat of her heart; she listened for the soft moans of pleasure that escaped her partner's lips and delighted in the touch of those dexterous fingers which began to caress her hair.

Since the accident Caroline's subconscious had plagued her with the fear that she had gone insane with grief and that Kate wasn't really there but merely a taunting apparition, a ghost, and if she were to leave her for any length of time Kate would no longer appear to her when she returned. She knew it was crazy and made no sense but still, the sight of Kate waiting for her, alive and well, all flesh and blood, a beating heart and a smiling face, flooded her soul with immeasurable relief. Her Kate was real and there with her.

oooOooo

"And all that I am

And all that I'll be

It's nothing at all

If you can't be with me."

oooOooo

A/N: Kate and Caroline FOREVER…even if forever is a very long time….in theory.