Here's a one- shot guys! I hope you like it!

~Vikki3775


Calling Finnocence

"Riiing!"

Finn grabbed his phone from his night stand. Looking at the name, he frowned.

"...Santana?" He muttered to himself. Shrugging, he picked up.

"Hello?"

"Geez Finnocence, what took you so long to answer? Were you getting your after snack, snack, which contains fat, fat, and more fat to add to your blubber body?" Chuckling slightly, Finn sighed.

"Hey Santana."

"Seriously though. You're not having a glee club meeting right now, are you? Because if that's the case, I'm gonna need you to send me every single song you guys are thinking of performing for nationals. There is no way Auntie Snixx is gonna let you guys fail at yet another competition. Mm mm."

"No, Santana I'm not at a glee club meeting...it was...cancelled." He lied.

"Oh please, gravy man. I can detect a very bad lie when I hear it. Should I mention my Mexican third eye again?" He frowned.

"Mexican-"

"Speaking of Mexican third eye, I need your help."

Finn looked curious. "Help to do what?"

"Catch someone in the act." She answered, laying across the couch. "It's good Rachel and Kurt aren't here, or I'd be in deep shit."

"Wait, what does this have to do with Kurt and Rachel?" He placed his pen on top of his college registration form and frowned. "If this is a plan to go against them, I'm not doing it, and it's not cool."

"Woah, Woah, Finn. Calm your Crispies. I'm not doing anything to hurt them, I'm here to help."

"Okay, so who are you helping?" He asked. "I know you only like helping one person at a time every few months, so..."

"Ha ha, very funny chunkier the clown." She dryly responded to his joke. "And your right." She sat up more on the couch and crossed her legs. "It is only one of them. It's Rachel."

Hearing his ex's name, his eyes widened.

"Wha-What's wrong? Is she hurt? Sick? Dammit, I told Kurt to keep giving updates on you guys so I don't have to worr-"

"Settle down hammy, she's just fine physically. Emotional wise,...not so sure." A silence on the other line gave her the signal to continue.

"It's about Brody."

Finns jaw clenched. "What about him?" He said tensely.

"Let's just say I've been keeping tabs on him. And me, being the nosy one that I am, found some very interesting things in his possession."

Finn frowned. "Like what?"

The Latina counted off of her fingers. "Let's see, a pager, one thousand dollars in cash, and a business card that's apparently his. It says, "Need some company? I'm the one."

"Wait, wait, so are you implying that he's a drug dealer, or a...fake friend?"

She sighed frustratedly, face palming. "No, idiot. I'm saying that he's a gigolo."

"A gigolo?" He repeated.

She groaned in frustration, "A man whore? I mean, how much more can I break it down for you?"

"A man whore?" He hissed as his jaw clenched again. He jumped up off of his bed and started pacing.

"I knew something was up with him. I just knew it..."

"Oh please, any guy Rachel dates gets the "something's up with him" speech from you." She retorted. Santana walked to the kitchen fridge and grabbed herself a water bottle, chugging it halfway, as her friend on the other line was explaining himself.

"Look, I initially called you because I need your help bringing him down." She said as she cut him off. "And since I know you'll do anything for Rachel, I knew we'd be the best at that. Bringing him down that is."

Finn sighed and stopped his pacing, sitting down at the edge of his bed. "Uh, okay well then what's the plan?"

She sat at the dining room table, crossing her arms.

"Well, it turns out that Brody meets all of his sexual suitors at a ballroom-slash-elegant hotel, where everyone's dressed up. Sketchy right? Anyways, I made a call to him personally, faking an English accent and calling myself Elizabeth or something. He already booked a hotel room for us to meet, and that's where you come in."

Finn nodded, processing the information. "So what exactly am I going to do?"

"You're gonna beat the living plastic out of the dude, duh!" She incredulously said.

"But, how am I gonna approach him? I can't just sneak behind his back. I might trip on my own feet, or something."

She sighed. "Fine, you'll appear out of a linen closet or something, whatever. I got you a plane ticket so don't worry about the costs."

Finn smiled. "Thanks Santana. That's really cool." She waved her hand around and dismissed it.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't be all excited. I booked one for Saturday night, so I expect you to meet me there before he arrives."

"Alright. And Kurt and Rachel aren't supposed to know about it, are they?" She smirked.

"They won't have a clue."

"Cool, uh. Well thanks for telling me Santana. It's nice to know that you would trust me enough to tell me."

"Alright blubber butt." She stood up and turned towards her secret pantry, grabbing a bag of non-organic chips. "I'll call you later about the more detailed plans, alright?"

He smiled. "Okay. Bye Satan!" He joked."

She chuckled and shook her head. "Bye Finnocence." After she hung up, he sighed, his application long forgotten. He'll go back to that, but for now he's focused on one thing...

Beating that Brody kid's ass.


Well there you go, people! Usually I'm terrible at thinking of good jokes for Santana to say, but I think I did well. Let me know what you guys think! Is really appreciate it!

Speaking of reviews and stories, I'm working on the next chapter for all fouR stories, so stay tune for that. I hope you enjoyed, bye!"

~Vikki3775