We shared a mutual dislike for each other, that's the way it had always been. I fought with him, he fought with me, and everything was swell. I'm not kidding, Naruto was just so easy to tick off, not to mention I absolutely adored the expression on his face whenever I outdid him in pranks and wit (it was somewhere between super confusedness and having to take a major crap). He painted the Hokage monuments, I walked up to the Hokage himself and painted his face. Now Sasuke-kun, he was a different story altogether. He was hot…uber hot, like rock my socks stick a spork in my--uhm, never mind. Let's just say he's hot, ok?
Anyway, so considering how uber spork-in-my-ahem, spaztastically drool-into-the-sink-while-brushing-my-teeth hot Sasuke-kun is (I am NOT a freaking Sasuke fan girl! I just think he's hot…really!), imagine my surprise and utter disappointment when I found out he left be-aut-iful Konohagakure just to go hang out with some stupid snake guy who has a hard on for him! I was so shocked that I didn't eat for a week! Ok, that's a lie, It was about 25.879 minutes, but you get the point, ne? I was shocked…damn, I already said that. Moving on, so yeah, Sasuke-kun leaves to go to the dark side (I hear they have really good cookies, but I'm too nice to be evil, there's this stupid voice in my head that tells me when I've been bad) and I'm stuck with a depressed not fun anymore Naruto. Stupid little Naru-chan can't think of anything aside from chasing after his pink-haired Barbie teammate and his evil sulky, jerky, but spaztastically hot teammate--which leaves me SOL.
Well since I'm going to tell you my life's story let's start with the beginning ok? Listen as my voice becomes dark and dramatic, solemn even, if I can manage that. The solemn voice is really hard to use, you know? You have to reach all the way into yourself and find some somewhat depressing and/or creepy foreshadowy memory and then put it to use. Oh yeah, my story!
Ok, in the beginning I was born! Dun dun dun! Let's see…I had a mom, no dad (bastard left because he wanted "someone younger and hotter," freaking perv) and one brother. He's not important though, because he's like ten or so years older than me and he moved out forever and a half ago. My mom whisked me away from the village hidden in the stone just in time for me to start Ninja training in Konoha, and that's when I first met Naruto. Insert dramatic gasp here.
Anyroad, Naruto seemed like a pretty pathetic fellow when I first met him, so I felt kinda bad for him and decided we should be friends. Well we all know how boys are, especially when they're still little fuckers. Oh, and in case you're wondering, the foul language is all part of the drama thing so just go with it, ok? Yeah, so I tried being friends with Naruto, but I didn't expect him to go all berserk on me just for calling him a "pathetic little fuc-I mean, fellow (the other word came later, after I learned what cussing was), or to bop me upside my head like I was anything less than royalty. I'm not royalty, I just thought I was at that age because I was like the awesomest person in Awesomeville and he brought me crashing down right back into reality…which I hate…sometimes.
I was so offended that I kicked him where the sun don't shine (eww, bad grammar) and we declared war on each other. Over the years Naruto and I played countless pranks on each other, ranging from me dying his hair pink to him making my skirt fly all the way up in front of Hot Sasuke and the rest of the class. I was wearing pink panties with winking smiley faces on them that day and it even shocked Naru-chan into silence. The only time we were even remotely nice to one another was the day we both flunked the exams to become genin. I had fallen asleep while making the hand signs for the bunshin no jutsu and accidentally blew up half the school because I made the wrong one, and he just couldn't make a presentable copy at all. No worries though, we both got our hitai-ate soon after the flunking session and were back at each other's throats in no time. I suppose that's about all that's really importantish so I won't tell you anything else about my childhood because it was pretty boring. All I did was play pranks, sleep, wake up, eat, and repeat the routine once more. I must admit though, I was a teensy bit upset to see him leave with Ero-Sennin for special training: Without him around it wasn't as much fun playing pranks and I became kinda sorta responsible. Let's all pause here for a bit of a memorial silence.
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Okies, now that I've returned I shall get to the point. Well do you remember how surprised I said I was when Sasuke-kun left to go to the dark side? Good, now oh my effing KAMI! If I was surprised then, then Naruto's return was absolutely mind-blowing. I mean, I just stood there with my mouth hanging open like the idiot I am, staring. He was HOT! And I don't mean (let's skip the spork thing and go straight to spoons) drool-in-the-sink hot, but just shmexiliciously boggle my eyes and render me blind hot! I could not believe that was the same fuck face (pardon the language) who left only two and a half years earlier.
Ok, now let's add some dialogue to this little story thingy okies?
"Reisha?" Naruto called, looking me over strangely. I forced a smile and waved pleasantly, wondering if he had matured at all during his extended absence. "Wow, you've grown up." He blinked stupidly and I rolled my eyes, blushing lightly.
"You too, Naru-chan," I said, eyes raking over his body discreetly. I laughed mentally as his face turned red from embarrassment.
"I told you not to call me that about"
"A million, bazillion times now, ne? But it fits you so well, Naru-chan!" I watched, amused, as steam poured from Naruto's ears and his hand twitched as if he was using all of his strength to not smack me right then and there. Naruto sighed, calming himself down. My eyes widened substantially; when had this loud-mouthed obnoxious boy learned how to control his emotions? Did it come with the hotness?
"Rei-chan?" Naruto asked hesitantly, stepping toward me cautiously. "Yes?" I said, snapping out of my trance and noticing how much space had closed between us. "Well, uhm, that is--"
"Just spit it out already!" I yelled, tapping my foot impatiently.
Naruto glared and stuck his nose in the air indignantly. "Well, there's this dance coming up at the academy for some reason"
"It's a class reunion," I pointed out, interrupting him and causing him to glare even more.
"And since Sakura-chan would rather go with fuzzy brows than a great ninja like me… I was wondering if you would go with me to the dance..."
I quirked an eyebrow and poked Naruto in the side. "Speak up Naru-chan, I can't hear a word you're saying"
"Will you go to the dance with me!" Naruto bellowed, face red as a radish that had just chugged a gallon of hot sauce. It was hard not to laugh, but the words that flew out of his mouth shut me up quick.
"Dance? With you? Seriously"
Naruto sighed, running a hand through his already messy hair. "Yes, seriously…we uh, need time to catch up with each other, don't you think? Besides, I need to know if you're still worth my pranks or not," he finished quickly.
"Right, and that's the only reason?" I asked, my eyes boring into his in an intimidating manner. No matter how shmexiliciously boggle my eyes and render me blind hot he was, this was still Naruto. I pretended to eye him suspiciously, like that had better be the only reason. Inside I was hoping beyond pie that he might say something else, though.
"Uhm, uh…yeah!" Naruto nodded his head and tried rolling his eyes in annoyance, but it came out as more of a shifty-eyed look. His face regained that familiar crimson hue that made him look almost glompable, and I mustered up one of my more charming smiles, just for him.
"Sure Naru-chan. I've got tons of pranks for you too," I chirped, rubbing my hands together and cackling evilly. Naruto shuddered and I smirked. "You can pick me up tomorrow at six, and dress nice." With a wave I turned and disappeared in a flash, my cheerful attitude fading and a deep blush painting my face red.
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I can't believe I'm wearing a dress. Honestly, the last time I wore a dress was…uh never, I think. Wait! There was that one time, and that other one time…and that other, other one time. So I guess that makes this the fourth time in my life that I have ever worn a dress. Wow, I look good in it too.
It's nothing fancy really: just a nice black plaid dress with a brown long sleeved shirt on under it and an off white shawl since it's a bit chilly. Throw in my spiffy hat and I've got on a nice outfit! Yay. My hair was in two loose braided pigtails so it wouldn't get in my face and that's about it. Other than lip gloss and a bit of eyeliner, I wasn't wearing any make-up. Make-up is to me as water is to witches. Evil.
I heard a loud banging on the door and sighed; one day I would really need to teach Naru-chan how to knock properly instead of banging the door down like a heard of elephants stampeding through a place much too narrow for them to be stampeding through. "Shut up, I'm coming!" I yelled at the door, causing the stampeding elephant sound to not sound anymore. Yeah, I'm weird, you don't have to say it. I walked to the door, taking my time and observing my nails casually in the dim light until I was sure I could hear the steam pouring from Naruto's ears. Then I turned the knob and opened it.
"It's about freaking time!" Naruto shouted in my face, waving his arms around wildly. Like I said, stampeding elephant. I rolled my eyes and glanced at a clock hanging on the wall of my apartment; 5:59.
"It's not my fault you're early, Naru-chan. I specifically told you six o' clock, and here you show up one minute and fifteen seconds early. I smiled as his eye twitched and allowed my eyes to travel over his body. The black suit really did something for Naruto, contrasting nicely with his bright blonde hair and blue eyes. I nodded my head in approval. "Nice"
"Huh"
"Nothing, shall we go?" Without waiting for an answer I grabbed Naruto's arm and dragged him off to the academy, ready for a dramatic entry.
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"Ok Naru-chan, you go in first, I've got something to do real quick," I said, ushering him inside. I ignored his protests, promising him that my plan didn't involve him or gassing his precious Sakura.
I paced for about five minutes before I deemed myself ready to enter my old school. By now my hair was askew, my hat somehow tangled up in it (I'm talented) and one of my shirt sleeves was rolled up while the other looked fine. I had one stocking tucked into the other and a shoe tied up in my shawl, which was in turn tied around my neck like a cape. I took a deep breath and burst through the academy doors, ready for my grand entrance.
Without saying a word I made my way to the center of the floor where the dance was being held (the kunai and shuriken practice room) and stood there with a lost, scared look on my face. Heads turned and my not-so-buddy-Kiba approached me hesitantly, while everyone else took a few steps back.
"Reisha? Are you ok?" He asked, ready to dart away if I showed any sign of attacking (he was the victim of many of my pranks too, but not nearly as much as Naruto.
"They're out there, I've seen them," I whispered, voice shaking in mock fear. I always knew I could act!
"Who's out there Reisha"
"The Voices"
"The Voices? But how can you see voices?" Kiba asked skeptically.
"They tried to eat me"
"What"
"My dog has malaria"
"Malaria"
"Yeah, the mosquito gave him mange. It's the contagious kind"
"Whoa, what!" Kiba suddenly jumped back and I took the opportunity to use one of my weaker water jutsus on him, breaking into laughter as it hit him full on in the face.
"Oh my gawd, I can't believe you actually fell for that, Kiba-kun! The look on your face was priceless! And you really needed a bath, you smell like my dog!"
"You don't have a dog!" Kiba roared, shaking himself off like a wet…erm, dog. I looked pointedly at Naruto, who was grinning from ear to ear, and dashed off to the bathroom to fix myself up for the night.
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"Gasp, Naruto come on, let's dance!" I said, pulling him up from his seat and pushing my way through the crowd and to the center of the dance floor. My favorite song (which is too embarrassing to name here) had just started and I was not about to miss it. I loved this song because it fit so well with the only dance I was actually good at--the foxtrot.
"What! I don't know how to dance!" Naruto flailed around, a clunky elephant in a sea of elegant dolphins. Yay for weird metaphors!
"It's not too bad, Naru-chan! I think you'll pick up on the foxtrot really easily!" I quickly explained the basics of the dance and we began moving to the music as soon as the lyrics began.
Wow, it's been two minutes and my feet are throbbing. I can tell Naruto is trying really hard to get this dance right, and it makes butterflies squirm around in my stomach…that might just be them trying to escape the pain shooting up my body from the countless times Naru-chan has stepped on my feet and run into me though…the song is almost over now, and Naru-chan's move's have become more graceful, almost matching mine perfectly. He picked me up nimbly and spun me gently before setting me down and putting his head to mine.
"Na-Naru-chan, you did well," I whispered into his ear, resting my head on his shoulder. I could feel the heat radiating off of his face and I'm sure he could feel the heat on mine too, but that only made me smile more.
"Gomen ne, Rei-chan. I stepped on your feet a lot." Naruto lifted my chin from his shoulder (which was quite comfy) and gazed unblinkingly into my deep green eyes. The look he gave me made me feel like I could just fly any moment, and I couldn't help but to hug him to me tightly. "Rei-chan?" Naruto questioned, surprised (understatement of the century! Damn, my constant interjection is ruining the romantic atmosphere!) at my actions.
"You were wonderful," I said, meeting his eyes once more. "Thank you for tonight,"
Naruto's face flushed again as he grinned cheekily. "It was my pleasure, Reisha." He wrapped his arms around me and we just stood there, unaware or uncaring of the questioning stares and the gossiping lips. We were focused on only each other, but this time it wasn't to see who would fall for who's prank first. This was for a different reason.
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So yeah, Naruto-kun and I are back to pranking each other whenever he's not off on a mission or I'm not busy teaching the academy students (being a Chuunin sucks sometimes), but in the midst of the pranks we always manage to steal a few hugs and kisses here and there. I can't believe I can say that without gagging, but oh well. I still haven't lost my touch, and thanks to my sweet ninja skills I am able to avoid the majority of Naruto's attacks. Ha, I still get him every time though. That's about all I have to say about anything in my life so why don't you take your nosey nose and shove it somewhere else, ne? Arigato, ja ne!
