Disclaimer: The Animorphs and all related things belong to K.A. Applegate and Scholastic, not me. I just want to hang out in their world. Also, surprisingly enough, I am not Shakespeare, so none of the Shakespeare quotes belong to me.
"Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! rage! blow!
You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout
Till you have drenched our steeples, drowned the cocks!
You sulphurous and thought-executing fires,-"
{Tobias?}
{Hold on a second, let me finish this page. You read faster than me.}
"Vaunt-couriers to oak-cleaving thunderbolts,
Singe my white head! And thou, all-shaking thunder,
Strike flat the thick rotundity o' the world!
Crack nature's molds, all germens spill at once
That make ingrateful man!"
{Okay, done. What is it?}
{I understand that Lear has been very wronged by this point in the play. But why is he directing his anger at the storm, rather than towards Goneril and Regan? The storm did not have a hand in his current situation, and it does not have any sort of conscious mind. He seems to be challenging something that has no way of responding, or even recognizing that it is being challenged. Is this common among humans?}
{Well, I think he's supposed to be going crazy or something. Kind of like Lady M freaking out about blood on her hands. It doesn't really have to make much sense, since it's their minds playing tricks on them.}
I nodded, although I was not quite convinced with Tobias' argument. Lady Macbeth had indeed hallucinated blood on her hands due to her guilt, but King Lear seemed to be randomly assigning personalities to unthinking forces. Perhaps his character would regain some semblance of rational thought as the play continued. Other than this issue, I was enjoying the play. The character of Cordelia reminded me somewhat of Cassie, and I had told Tobias as much. I had thought it would be wise not to mention how Regan reminded me of Rachel.
When Tobias had first found the collection of plays in a used book store, I was hesitant. The text was written in a sort of archaic human style, and I had spent long enough learning how to communicate with modern-day humans. But after a short bit of time I was able to understand the older style; in fact, I was soon able to understand it more easily than Tobias. Many of the references eluded me, but human books occasionally come with additional text called "footnotes", smaller text written at the bottom of the page that explains things that could not be easily gathered from the main story. These footnotes explained many of the foreign concepts. Of course, I still needed Tobias' help when attempting to understand certain ideas in the plays.
{Is it really that simple for human females to disguise themselves as males? Both Orsino and Olivia seem completely convinced that Viola is actually a male, but the text only says that she is "in man's attire".}
{Maybe she cut her hair. Or tied back her chest so she was…you know…flatter.}
{You mean she might have bound her breasts, thereby concealing her secondary sexual characteristics?}
{…Yeah, that.}
{I suppose that might work for a human. For an Andalite female to disguise herself as a male without the use of morphing technology, she would have to somehow change the color of her fur, the size and shape of her tail blade, the structure of her body, and the tone of her thought speak. But this does raise another question. It would also be possible for human males to disguise themselves as females, correct?}
{Well, yeah, like drag queens and stuff.}
{Royalty is involved?}
{No, it's, um…Let's just keep reading.}
We had worked our way through many of the plays in the volume. I would stand in the middle of a clearing with the book while Tobias perched in a branch above me. With his powerful eyesight he was able to read the text (even the footnotes) while still keeping watch and making sure we were not discovered. He did indeed read more slowly than me, but it was still a pleasurable way to spend time when we were not needed on missions with the other Animorphs. I found myself quite drawn to the category of plays known as the histories. Tobias explained that while the works were based on events in human history, people in earlier time periods had not actually spoken with that level of eloquence on a regular basis, and the events described were somewhat fictionalized. But the historical falsehoods contained within did not long distract me from the wonderful nature of the stories.
My favorite was when we read the play "Henry V". The main character is a leader known as Henry V (not to be confused with Henry IV, Henry VI, Henry VIII, Henry Percy, Henry 'Hotspur' Percy, or Henry Guilford. Humans lack a certain amount of creativity when it comes to their naming practices.) At one point, he is preparing to lead his troops into battle, so he recites a speech to give them courage:
"This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remember'd, —
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me,
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England, now a-bed,
Shall think themselves accurs'd, they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap, whiles any speaks,
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day."
I have long since, in my time on Earth, come to recognize the strength and courage that humans can posses. But when reading this passage, I was momentarily convinced that this Shakespeare human had spent time among Andalites. It sounded like something that Elfangor would have told a gathering of troops. The feelings of pride and honor inherent in battle rang clear in the words. And it had certainly made me happy to think of myself, Tobias, and the other Animorphs as a "band of brothers".
Tobias was often bored and occasionally impatient with the histories, so we had agreed to alternate between them with other plays. His favorites were in a grouping called the tragedies, which I in turn had less patience for. Many of them seem to put far too much focus on supernatural forces to drive the plots. I can empathize with Hamlet's need for revenge against the man who killed his father, but I do not see why something as foolish as a ghost is needed to set the plan in motion. It is not nearly as egregious an example as "Macbeth", however, which claims that creatures known as "witches" actually have the power to tell the future, something which is just laughable and completely out of place anywhere outside of children's stories. But Tobias found these stories interesting, so we spent time reading them as well. Sometimes he seemed to become very invested in the stories, becoming frustrated at the mistakes the characters make.
{Ugh, come on, Romeo. Yeah, their families are fighting, but it's not that big of a deal, they could work around it. Or they could, if he wasn't so busy whining.}
{Do you wish to stop reading this play? We could move on to another if you would like.}
{No, no, it's one of the big classics, definitely something you should read. Plus the ending's good. It's sad, and they should have been able to avoid it, but it's still really good.}
The last category in the volume was called the comedies. These were occasionally enjoyable, but human humor is always difficult to understand, and apparently it changes with the passage of time, so Tobias did not understand many of the supposed jokes either. In the other plays, the jokes could be overlooked because they were not central to the story at hand, but the comedies rely heavily on an understanding of and appreciation for human humor. I do not believe I will ever see what is humorous about tricking someone into wearing a yellow piece of artificial skin known as stockings in a style known as "cross-gartered", no matter how many times it is explained to me. I have to work hard enough to understand Marco's jokes, so I think I should just resign myself to not understanding Shakespeare's.
Tobias has told me that these plays are considered to be the height of art and refinement. They have influenced a great deal of human art and culture and are known and referenced by many, in a variety of situations. Therefore, I felt that it would be wise for me to make myself very familiar with the texts. However, my attempts to integrate the works into my daily conversation have not been as well received as I would have hoped.
"Okay, guys, how are we going to work our way into this place? According to Erek, we're looking at a couple dozen Hork-Bajir stationed inside the building, with human guards patrolling around outside. Any ideas?"
"Maybe we could fly in as seagulls and demorph on the roof, then go cockroach and sneak inside."
"Yeah, and get picked off by Dracon beams before you can say 'rats with wings'."
"That's pigeons, not seagulls. And seriously, we need to think of something."
{O, for a muse of fire, that would ascend the brightest heaven of invention.}
They all stared at me for a long time. Finally, Prince Jake spoke up.
"Ax, are you feeling okay?"
{Yes, I am fine.}
Apparently I have to work on my delivery.
