She took is just like she always did. She never asked why. She knew that is was just the way it was. It had been going on for as long as she could remember. She knew that there wasn't really anything that would be done about it. She accepted it. It was probably the most constant thing in her life.

Her parents never really wanted her. The only reason that she was born was to help her sister. Her sister needed a bone marrow transplant and her parents hoped that a biological sibling would supply one. She was a disappointment to them from the moment she was born. She wasn't a match. Her sister died less than a year after she was born. Her parents never recovered. Her mom couldn't bring herself to love her and her father blamed her for everything that was wrong in his world.

She was lucky growing up in some ways. Race is such a big issue in the Midwest and she really didn't have to deal with it in elementary school. She went to a small private school through sixth grade and it kept that card off the table. Being something other than white was one thing but being mixed was another. Luckily, her father's money kept teachers mouth shut. There really wasn't that many kids that were different in the school. Her only real friend through elementary school was the Korean girl. Different always seems to find each other. Unfortunately, different also drives people apart.

She was the only one in glee that knew her as a different person. She never said anything. She let her have her persona. Maybe it was because she never told anyone that the stutter was a fake. Maybe she didn't want to have her turn the pain on her like she did so many others. Maybe she was afraid that it would only make things worse for her if anyone really saw her. The façade was the only thing that kept her together and without it her life would crumble.

She was the biggest bitch at McKinley High. She instilled terror in almost everyone she met. Her reputation kept her safe. It kept everyone away. Almost everyone. She couldn't stop herself from letting the girl in. The girl touched her soul. Protecting her from the horrors of the world became her main purpose. She became the only thing that would bring warmth into her world. She loved her but loving her would ruin everything.

It was New Year's Eve and she was alone in her room. Her father had lost a patient that afternoon and needed to vent on something. She left her bag in front of the door and he tripped over it. It was her fault. She knew she got what she deserved. It would take a couple of days for her dark skin to hide the bruises. She couldn't run the risk of anyone seeing. She couldn't let anyone see her as weak. Her reputation was all that she was.

Her phone rang for the fifth time in an hour. She wanted to ignore it again but she new how much it would bother the other girl.

"Hello"

"San, where are you?"

"Sorry B, I'm not going to get there. Better party tonight at Northwestern. Hotter guys better booze less bullshit. See you Monday at school"

"Ok. Happy New Year Santana"

"Happy New Year B"

She hangs up and crawls into her bed. Her body aches all over but she never sheds a tear. The pain, at least, reminds her that she still can feel. She curls up in a ball and says a silent prayer. "Please God take me" but she knows he doesn't hear.