Okay.
So this is how it went down.
Here I am minding my own business after a long and gruesome day at work. I have the most boring job in the known universe; I'm an insurance clerk.
You may stop laughing now.
I mean it.
Stop it.
Right now, I might be losing it. Maybe I already have but I'd like to think someone simply whacked me over the head. It would be kinder to my self-esteem instead of admitting that I've completely and utterly lost my marbles.
I tend to get sidetracked. Don't be surprised.
Anyway, I'm walking down the main street to my crappy little apartment in the noisiest part of town. I'm digging through my army backpack – yes, I am an insurance clerk who dresses in fancy suits and walks around with an army backpack. I'm proud of it. – trying to find my keys. Mind you, the backpack is enormous.
Now, instead of just standing still and looking for my keys, the idiot-who-I-am kept walking without looking.
I'm quite certain the lamp pole hadn't been there the day before. I'm obliged to think someone planted it there just for me while I was away at work. This would at least give me a good reason not to think of myself as a total moron.
Before I knew it, my head collided with the damned thing. I remember a very, very loud clunk and then all went black.
And I hadn't even found my keys.
Damn those things to hell.
------
I woke up with a really bad headache.
Obviously.
I reached up to rub my forehead and to my utter dismay, I felt a lump smack in the middle. I wondered if I looked like a unicorn. It wouldn't have surprised me, since I was stupid enough to walk up against a pole in the first place.
I blinked my eyes open, hoping the blurriness would sprout legs and go away. How long it took, I can't say but once I could see clearly, I frowned. I would have expected to see a darkening night sky – maybe even completely dark, depending on how long I was laying on the street. Yeah, the sky was dark alright but I saw things in the air. Flying things in straight lines – traffic lanes? In the sky? Ships?
I really had hit my head hard, huh?
I sat up while I kept staring at the sky. Besides the flying ships, I noticed that the buildings were pretty damned tall. I live in a big city and we have one or two skyscrapers – I think – but this was beyond anything I had ever imagined. When I say tall, I mean TALL. Like Goliath times a hundred! Or better yet, mix up Goliath and King Kong and you'd still not reach the top of the highest building. Maybe throw in a bit of Godzilla, too.
Nah, not even then.
While contemplating where in the world I had landed – I don't watch the news much but I think I would have at least read somewhere about flying ships and skyscrapers that reached into friggin space – I got to my feet. My legs wobbled a little and I had to take care not to twist my ankles in the hideous heels I was wearing. All for the job, you know?
Why can't we just sit behind our desks in sweat suits? It would be so much easier.
I held on to my trusty backpack as if my life depended on it. Because when I looked around the place, I knew I wasn't in Kansas anymore.
I stared dumbfounded, my mouth hanging down to my knees, no doubt. There were even more vehicles than I'd first thought, flying in zigzagging lanes above me. Thousands of ships if not more! But what really got me?
I was being stared at. Which wouldn't have bothered me – I'm used to standing out in a crowd. But not like this. There were creatures all around me, gaping and pointing, whispering. There were humans like me, males and females and then people who looked human but sprouted thick tail-like things from their heads. Maybe they were human and it's the newest fashion accessory? Or maybe I needed to get my head examined.
There were extraordinarily tall, walking dogs, too. They're cute in their own furry funny way. But the way a few of them growled wasn't cute at all.
I clutched my backpack tighter to my chest and turned a full circle. Wherever I was, it seemed I was either not welcomed or else something else was wrong. Others glared at me as well, some with huge round pink heads, others with horns and again others with green or orange skin. What in the world…
"You can't be here!" I heard a male voice yell and turned around. A man came up to me, wearing black fatigues with a rifle strapped across his chest. A rifle.
A rifle?!
"I'm going to have to ask you to leave, ma'am. This is a restricted area."
I fumbled with my backpack as the guard or police officer or whatever he was inclined his head towards the group of people staring at me. He wanted me to go there?
Uh-uh.
Not gonna happen.
"I'm sorry." I stammered, quickly remembering that I'm a schooled insurance clerk. I could talk my way out of anything. "But I'm in something of a predicament at the moment. I…uh…"
"Ma'am. If you don't leave the grounds now I will have to take you into custody."
Custody sounded bad in many different ways. Custody meant jail, right? But jail also meant protection from the strange people who definitely paid way too much money for plastic surgery. And then it hit me! If this was a restricted area, maybe these people were having something of a real life role-playing game!
I smiled at the officer and swung my pack over my shoulder. "If you could tell me where I am, I will gladly leave."
"Crystal Plaza. It's a restricted area while the Chief of State holds his speech."
I've been around for a while and I had never before heard of a place called Crystal Plaza. I cleared my throat, feeling my cheeks warm up with a blush. Always happened in the wrong situations. "I don't know where I am." I said honestly, knowing it would get me nowhere to lie. And anyway, I was afraid.
Those people were still staring at me!
The officer frowned. It was obvious that he thought I was some kind of nut case. And maybe he was right. "I'm sorry, ma'am. You're going to have to come with me."
I nodded and I followed willingly.
