Title: Safe

Summary: Greg is determined to fix his mistakes, and let go of the ones he can't.

Spoilers: No Way Out

Pairing: Greg/Riley

Genre: Romance, Hurt/Comfort.

Word Count (not including Author's Note): 651

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Except my PC perhaps.


I rest my head against the locker door and sigh. She's safe; she's safe I chant hoping the mantra will displace the stress weighing down on me. Distress offers no relief.

I want to laugh, just to see if it will trigger something in my head--something that will tell me that it's okay to laugh because she's going to be okay. Something tells me all it will trigger is the urge to cry. I want to cry a lot these days.

I want a lot to scream too. And yell at someone--at anyone. I wanted to yell the day it happened, but I let Nick do it instead. Nick has always been the one to wear his heart on his sleeve so I let him do the shouting. I think he needed it more than I did anyway. Maybe not.

I let Nick see how she was doing too, when she came out for the first aid kit. Not because he needed it more than me, because God knows how much I needed to see her. In fact I think I needed that too much. Because I'm sure that if I had gone I would have kissed her right there and then. And then we'd both be doomed.

She's safe, she's safe, she's safe--but what if something had happened. What if she had gotten hurt?

I should have stayed. When she indicated what was wrong I should have stayed. What if something happened that I could have prevented? I should have stayed. Why the hell didn't I stay?!

I punch the locker. Blood spatter indicates a upwards motion. I wonder where that came from. I pull away from more CSI thoughts and focus on the blood drops falling from my knuckles. I smash my other hand against the locker. I do it again, and relish the pain--stronger than before.

I could have saved her

Smash

I should have stayed.

Blood

She could have gotten hurt.

Pain

All my fault

Guilt

I should have saved her.

"Greg!"

Someone pulls me back, but I all I see is the blood...so much blood...my blood...

I focus on my surrounding. She's looking at me. I want to cry. She reaches for the first aid kit under the bench. She signals to Nick that the suspect is armed. She looks up awkwardly at the open door where the Frankie's gun is pointed at her. She pulls out a bottle of disinfectant. She hands it to Ray, who pours it over Reggie's shoulder wound. She bandages my hands and asks me what's wrong. She asks Frankie for help and takes the gun out of his hands. She tells me that she's taking me home. She's walking with the team and we're going home to the lab. I want to kiss her but I don't.

I kiss her. She kisses me back. Her cheeks are wet with tears and it takes me a second to realise that they're mine. She's safe, she's safe. She is going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay.

I feel like laughing, because when she's here everything is alright again. I kept thinking about the 'what ifs' that stopped mattering the second she walked out of the PCP lab. She's safe and okay and it doesn't matter what could have happened because it didn't happen.

Her lips are against mine and her hands are on my face, and she has to be okay because she's here and she's kissing me.

I need this so much it hurts.

"Everything's going to be okay," she whispers to me. But I know that already. How can anything be wrong if she's here with me?

"Are you really safe?"

"Yes," she whispers. "We're both safe. As long as we're together, we'll always be safe."

She's here and I can breathe again. Memories slip away and I'm determined to make new ones.


Author's Note: Hopefully writer's block has abandoned me. This is very different from what I first intended but blah.

Thanks for reading (and hopefully reviewing)