Caroline walked into her empty house, hung her coat on its hook and turned on all the lights on the way into her kitchen. It was spotless, as usual, since Lawrence was off at his father's for a couple of days. She missed the mess when he wasn't home. An opened bottle of her current favorite red wine was waiting on the counter. She grabbed it by the neck and poured a healthy glass before plating some cheese and crackers for her dinner and wondered what take-away Lawrence convinced John to let him have for dinner.

She settled into the family room to eat in front of University Challenge, her now nightly ritual when alone. Halfway through her program, she found her thoughts drifting back to her last meeting of the week.

As she greeted the Dixons in her outer office, she told Beverly she could leave and to enjoy her weekend. She watched them take their seats and noticed Mr. Dixon check his watch. It was later than she usually met with parents but the last minute meeting was hastily scheduled.

Caroline had always enjoyed her exchanges with the Dixons over the years at school functions. They were good supporters of Sulgrave and their son, Seb, was one of the top ten students in his form, as was their daughter, Willow, two years before. It always impressed her that Willow was admitted to the Sorbonne. She didn't know Mrs. Dixon very well but the school came to rely on her handling the ticket sales for the school shows when her children were in the cast. Mr. Dixon, who had a high position in a regional bank, often helped with the sets. She liked that they were involved in their children's interests, which was why she arranged their meeting.

"Thank you for coming in Mr. and Mrs. Dixon. I'm sorry to do this to you on a Friday night but I felt a conversation about your son was long overdue. He's one of our best students but lately we've had some behavioral issues with him that I'd like to nip in the bud," the tired headmistress began.

"We were stunned to get your call about him. We'd like to hear what is really going on," Mr. Dixon responded.

"We've noticed that he is not interacting well with some of the students in our LGBT support group. He's been overheard making some inappropriate statements and I wanted to have a chat before things go too far and a student or a teacher files a formal complaint. I'd hate to see a student with such promise have any blemish on his record," she explained.

Caroline sat quietly for a few minutes to let the information sink in and to give them time to respond. Although they were thankful she cared enough to handle the situation in an informal manner, both parents instantly shifted uncomfortably in their seats. She noticed Mrs. Dixon was staring at the floor and Mr. Dixon was suddenly red in the face, looking as though his head was about to explode.

Mrs. Dixon spoke first. "That's disappointing and unacceptable. We'll work with him to make sure he understands the sensitivity of it all and to make sure it doesn't happen again. I'm so sorry."

"It's not that simple Portia. You know he's lashing out," Mr. Dixon barked at her.

"He's just following your lead Clark. I told you he would take his cues from you," she replied as she reached into her purse for a tissue. Realizing what she was looking for without success, Caroline handed her a box of tissues.

"Thank you. I'm sorry Dr. Elliot. You don't need us to hash this out in front of you but I'm very grateful that you care enough to bring it to our attention."

"Portia's right. We'll talk with him. Can you tell me how many instances there have been?"

"Well, that student group meets weekly and for the past three weeks he's teased some kids as they have been leaving the meetings," she explained.

"There you go Portia. That matches the timeline. I told you he wasn't taking it as well as you thought," he snapped.

"It seems as though I've treaded on a land mine," Caroline said to try to diffuse the growing tension between the parents. "Without meaning to get personal, is there anything I can do to help?"

Mr. Dixon glared at his spouse. She took another tissue from the box, dabbed at her eyes and then quietly began, "Well, it's just that we decided to end our marriage about a month ago. Shortly after Clark told me he wanted out, I was being consoled by my cousin, Cathy. Seb walked in and misconstrued what he heard and thinks the break up is my fault. You see, Cathy is gay and she was joking with me that I should switch teams."

"That's a very sanitized version of events there Portia," Clark snarled. "Actually, he heard you two talking about Gretchen. At least we know why he might be lashing out at those students."

Caroline could tell that Clark was very uncomfortable discussing such personal details in public and she realized he too was lashing out at his wife but she could not tell why exactly since Mrs. Dixon said he was the one who wanted out of the marriage.

"I'm very sorry to hear your news and I thank you for sharing with me what you have. As I said, I wanted us to have a private chat about Seb and I assure you that I will keep this to myself." Caroline noticed how relieved the Dixons looked. "I was hoping you would talk with him about his recent behavior. If there are no more incidents, I assure you this will not be mentioned again. Perhaps you might want to suggest to him that he join the student group. Many of the kids aren't gay but have family members who are and they have joined to be advocates and show their support of their family members."

"Thank you Dr. Elliot. I assure you that Seb will not cause any further problems. I've got to run to a dinner meeting. Portia, we can talk about this tomorrow," Clark said as he stood to leave.

As soon as he was out the door, Portia said, "Dinner meeting my ass. He's off to see his girlfriend. But Seb adores him so I'm the one he blames."

"Sadly, I've been there. When my marriage ended, my youngest blamed me and tried like crazy to get us back together. It's been tough but I think he's starting to understand. Just give it some time Mrs. Dixon."

"I'm so tired of that name. Please call me Portia."

"Only if you call me Caroline."

"Well, I've kept you from your weekend long enough, Caroline. Thank you again for your discretion."

"You've done no such thing. I'm sorry to hear your news. If you ever need a sympathetic ear from someone who's been where you are, just call."


A couple of weeks later, Caroline spotted Portia working the ticket sales at the school play. She walked over to say hello and received a wide smile. She noticed Portia looked thinner and tired.

"It's good to see you Caroline. How's Seb doing?"

"He seems back to himself. The better question is how are you?"

"Finding my new normal I guess."

"My offer still stands. If you need someone to talk with just let me know."

"Actually, how about a drink after the show? Seb is going to a fellow cast member's tonight and I dread going back to an empty house." Caroline remembered that feeling.

"How about we meet at Lucia's Wine Bar and Grille? I'll call for a table and put it under my name. I skipped lunch today so maybe we can grab a bite as well as a drink."

"I haven't been there in ages. Great. See you there after the show."


They pulled into the car park at about the same time and caught up with each other just inside the door. Caroline felt a little awkward about the invitation as she watched the show but by the time the curtain fell she was glad to have something to do other than go home to an empty house.

"Thanks for taking me up on the invite. I can't remember the last time I was out this late," Portia began as they looked at the menu.

"I'm sure my cat is wondering where I am as I'm usually not out this late either," Caroline responded with a chuckle.

"Hmmm. I was thinking about getting a cat but then I was afraid I'd not stop at one and people would begin to talk," Portia quipped.

The waitress appeared and took their order. They agreed upon a couple of personal sized pizzas to share and a bottle of a sangiovese. As they handed the menus back to the server, Caroline decided to venture into the personal. "All kidding aside, are things that bad?"

"It's not been a cake walk. Clark has moved on, Seb seems to be in such denial and I'm left trying to pick up the pieces."

"I'm so sorry. I remember those days. Does Clark give him mixed signals about your marriage being over?"

Portia nodded her head and started playing with her water glass. "He refuses to move out even though he spends several nights a week with his girlfriend so yes, I'd say the signals are mixed."

The waitress returned with their wine. They clinked glasses as Caroline said, "here's to do overs."

After a few more sips and an awkward pause, Caroline continued. "John did the same thing to me. If I learned one thing I could pass on to you it's that you have to remember you have needs and feelings too. What are you doing for yourself?"

"Aside from going to the gym while Seb's at school, nothing. There's been no time. Most nights I'm just trying to make sure his life is as normal as it can be; I'd hate to see our upheaval affect his studies. If it weren't for working out I'd probably have gone mad by now." Suddenly Caroline understood why Portia always seemed to be wearing workout clothes when she is at the school to pick up or drop off Seb.

"How's your daughter taking it?"

"Willow hasn't been home since before Clark's little announcement so I don't think she fully comprehends the finality of it all. We've had our issues in the past but always managed to keep the marriage together. This time, there's no going back for me. I think she expects us to work through it as we've always done."

"Will she be supportive of you?"

"Yes. She's always taken my part in the past when we've had our flare-ups. That's probably why Clark's been trying to get Seb's sympathies." Portia paused to take a long sip of her wine. "Willow and I had a rather difficult conversation about my college days and Clark's misguided allegations but she seems to have handled it in stride. I think her love of Kate McKenzie made her more comfortable with the subject matter than she might have been otherwise."

Caroline shifted uncomfortably in her seat at the mention of Kate's name. She didn't know if Portia knew about their relationship and she wanted to tread lightly. "I remember Kate saying Willow was one of her favorite students."

"I don't think Willow would have gotten into the Sorbonne without her help."

Caroline took a sip of her wine and carefully placed her glass back on the cocktail napkin. "Kate is a great teacher but Willow's very clever. Kate puts her all into helping her students realize their own potential."

"Now it's my turn to get personal. Is it over for you both?" Portia looked around for the waitress hoping the food would arrive as she was beginning to feel the effects of drinking on an empty stomach.

Caroline instantly felt relieved that Portia knew and didn't seem judgmental. "I still hold out hope but it seems so. Whatever you do, don't make the mistake I did of hiding behind everyone else's needs and not pursuing what is important to you out of fear."

"I'm not sure I know what you mean."

"Well," she slowly began. She was relieved to be interrupted by the waitress arriving with their pizzas as she needed the time to get her answer together. After they each took a bite, Caroline continued. "I wasn't ready to be out and proud when I started seeing Kate. I hid my full feelings about her from my family under the guise of trying to break them into the situation slowly. Eventually she lost her patience with me and moved on."

"I'm really sorry Caroline. I watched my cousin, Cathy, struggle with coming out. I know from her it was a process that wasn't easy. How many years were you married?"

"Eighteen before I found out about John's affair. Imagine my surprise at finding myself single again. The only ones more surprised were my family when I brought Kate home. One minute John moved out to live with his girlfriend, the next he tried to come back. I said 'no' and I moved Kate in with me to get the point across to him that we were through. But then I treated her more like a roommate than a proper partner in front of my family. I wish I'd taken it slower with Kate and been more considerate of her feelings. Maybe we'd still be together."

"Well, at this point my family is braced for me to make an announcement about switching teams but I think it's a little premature as I'm not interested in any kind of a relationship. After 20 years of marriage I just need a break."

"Mind if I ask you about Gretchen?"

"Gretchen was my closest friend at university. We lost touch until a few years ago when we reconnected on Facebook. After her marriage failed, she came out and is now happily married to a great gal named Lila." She paused to take a sip of her water and then continued, "We were never more than friends but Clark has it in his head that we had a fling. Seb heard us arguing about it one night and Clarke played it up to obfuscate his bad behaviour."

"Sounds a bit below the belt."

"I think his ego was hurt because I didn't beg him to stay like I'd done every time before. But he's always been a dirty player. It's how he climbed over so many to get where he has at the bank."

"How's your pizza? Ready to try a slice of mine?"

"Excellent. Yes, let's trade." Caroline gave her a piece of her goat cheese and spinach pizza and took a slice of Portia's chicken and pesto pizza.

"Hmmm, nice pick. It pairs great with this red. So what's your plan going forward?"

"I just want to get Seb through graduation. Then we'll work on selling the house and getting divorced. I think I'm getting excited about having a second chance to find myself again." She paused to take another bite before continuing the conversation. "What's your plan for getting Kate back? Have you thought about telling her straight from your heart how you feel and what you'd do differently if she'd give you a second chance."

"I would if I had the opportunity to talk with her alone. She's done a good job of avoiding me at school. At least I have my mother's wedding to help plan with my step-sister. That'll be a good distraction." She thought about telling her about the baby but she'd already shared more than she would normally be comfortable discussing and realized it was getting pretty late.

"Your mother is getting married? How wonderful. But how old is she?"

"Mid-seventies. Actually, they eloped a couple of weeks ago but now want to have a wedding for everyone to celebrate. They have known each other since their school days and reconnected only a few months ago on Facebook. It's a long story and frankly it's getting late and there's not enough wine left in this bottle to tell it. But I'm happy for them."

"Any chance of inviting Kate to the wedding? Weddings are supposed to be good for inspiring romance."

"If only. Mum wasn't always supportive of our relationship. All I can do is pray for a Christmas miracle if I can't get through to Kate before then."

"Well, here's hoping then. What's say we get the bill and get going? I think I'm about to turn into a pumpkin too," said Portia.

They paid their bill and headed to their cars. "Thanks again for being there tonight. If I can ever return the favor, just let me know."

"I came to give you moral support but it seems like you've done the same for me. You're a great listener. Perhaps we can do this again sometime before the holidays," suggested Caroline.

"I'd like that. Good luck with Kate. Night."

"Hmmm. Thanks. Drive safely. Night."