NARUTO :
"Drunk At The Bar''
Shizune sat beside Naruto at the bar and sipped a bottle of sake. She looked over at the orange clad ninja as he tried to stack six ramen bowls and they all fell over.
"Ahhhh , shit ,'' Naruto slurred , "Theeeeeey all fell over.''
"You dork ,'' Shizune said , "Yoooou're not supposed to stack them like that. Here let me show you. You're supposed to stack'em like this.''
Shizune grabbed the bowls and stacked them up until she made a pyramid and Naruto looked at it.
"Ohhhhhh ,'' he stated , "That'ssssss how you do it. ( Hiccup ).''
Next Naruto started laughing and then fell out of his seat.
"Arrrrrrre you okay , Naruto ? ,'' Shizune asked.
"Yeah ,'' Naruto said getting up.
Next he looked at Shizune's legs and smiled.
"Nice legs ,'' he said.
"Thanks ,'' Shizune stated.
Naruto got to his feet slowly and then started to walk backwards. He walked backwards until he ran in to Kakashi and they both fell over. Shizune started laughing.
"Hey , Naruto ,'' Kakashi said , "Watch where you're going.''
"Whatever ,'' Naruto stated.
He got up and then turned around and faced the wall.
"Hey , Shizune ,'' he called over his shoulder , "This wall just called your mother a bitch.''
"What ? ,'' Shizune asked.
She got up and stumbled over to Naruto.
"What did you say about my mother you sssssssstupid wall ? ,'' Shizune asked , "You'd better apologize before I kick your ass.''
The wall said nothing.
"Well you know what ? ,'' she asked , "I can give the silent treatment too.''
Next Shizune turned around and crossed her arms. She waited for five minuets and then looked down at the floor. It was covered in spilled sake and peanut shells.
"Oh , look ,'' Shizune said , "Peanut shells.''
"Peanut shells ? ,'' Naruto asked.
Next Gai ran by in his underwear and ran up to Neji.
"Hey , Neji ? ,'' Gai asked , "I've looked at every pretty girl around here and have deiced that you are the hottest one. So how about I take you home for a little midnight romance ?''
"I'mmmmmmmm sorry , Sensei ,'' Neji said , "But me and my sake glass have already decided to start dating. Maaaaaaybe you could asssssssssk Kurenai if she would want to play with your puppy.''
"What ? ,'' he asked.
"I SAID MAYBE YOU COULD ASK KURENAI IF SHE WOULD LIKE TO PLAY WITH YOUR PUPPY ! ,'' Neji shouted.
"I don't have a puppy ,'' Gai replied.
"You don't ? ,'' he asked , "That's too bad. What we're we just talking about ?''
Naruto turned back to Shizune and smiled.
"You know what , Naruto ? ,'' Shizune asked.
"What ? ,'' he asked.
"I think I'm going to puke ,'' Shizune stated.
Next she covered her mouth and then threw up all over the floor. Naruto looked down at the pile of puke.
"Whoa ,'' Naruto said , "Did you see all that puke come out of your mouth ? Is that a new jutsu you've developed ?''
"It's one I've been trying to master for years ,'' she said , "I haven't quite gotten there yet.''
"Oh ,'' Naruto said.
"Can you buy me a pony ? ,'' Shizune asked.
"Why do you want a pony ? ,'' he asked.
"Because then I can have something to ride ,'' Shizune said.
"Whhhhhhhhy do you need a fucking pony when you can ride me ? ,'' Naruto asked.
"Ride you ? ,'' she asked.
"Yeah ,'' Naruto replied , "I'll let you ride me whenever you want.''
"Coooooooool ,'' Shizune said.
Next she fell out of her chair and then slowly got to her feet. Naruto looked at her.
"You're . . . . .drunk , Shizune ,'' Naruto said.
"Are you fucking kidding me , Naruto ? ,'' she asked , "I'm not drunk. I feel alive and free. Look. If I were drunk could I do this ?''
Next Shizune did a hand stand and then did a back flip and landed on her feet. Two seconds after that she fell on to the floor and landed on her butt.
"You're drunk ,'' Naruto said.
"So are you ,'' Shizune stated.
"I'm not drunk ,'' he countered.
"Oh yeah , Ninja boy ,'' Shizune said , "Prove it. Walk to the wall and back in a straight line.''
"Fine ,'' Naruto stated getting to his feet.
Naruto walked to the wall and stopped.
"Walk back to me ,'' Shizune stated.
He turned around and started to walk back to her. Next he side stepped to his left and then fell to the floor.
"See ,'' Shizune said , "I told you you were drunk.''
"Whatever , Ino ,'' he replied.
"I'm Shizune ,'' Shizune stated.
"Oh , right ,'' Naruto said.
Next he picked up a peanut and tossed it in to his mouth.
"This peanut tastes like sake ,'' he said.
"What dose my tongue taste like ? ,'' Shizune asked.
Before Naruto could reply Shizune grabbed him and kissed him. Next she put her tongue in his mouth. Next she broke the kiss and smiled drunkenly at him. Naruto smacked his lips together.
"It tastes like sake ,'' Naruto replied.
"Hmm ,'' she said.
Next she passed out. Naruto looked down at her and then he passed out. Kakashi looked down at them and then snapped their picture. Next he walked away whistling.
THE END.
