A/n: Welcome to the first chapter of Random Death Note Scenerios and Conversations! Hot off my brain! These will be series of random scenerios and conversations that I can picture happening!

Warning: Spoilers for the entire series! Read only if you have finished either all 12 volumes or all 37 episodes.

Light: Wait, so that's the entire story?

Me: Yup!

Light( pulls out pen and Death Note)

Me: Light, what are you doing?

Light(turning away from me): Nothing.

Me: Then why do you have out your death note and a pen?

Light: I saw a mafia boss pass by and i need to write his name down in my death note.

Me: Uh, Light, we're in my bedroom. Wait, were you trying to write my name in the death note so i wouldn't publish this?

Light: Ma-maybe.

Me: Uh-huh. Give it.

Light: Give what?

Me: Give me your death note, Light.

Light: No.

Me: Light, give it to me. You know what happens when you cross me.

Light: Gulps. Eep.

Me: Now, while I pry Light away from his precious notebook, L, can you do the disclaimer?

L: Sure. Shojoshonengirl does not own Death Note. If she did, well, mention of what would happen to the story would change this fanfic's rating to M, instead of T.

Me(grabs death note.)

Light: NOOO! MY PRECIOUS!

Me:MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Now, onto the randomness!


Setting: Light in his room talking to Ryuk about his plans for the Death Note.

Light:... Using the Death Note, I'll change this rotten world and I'll become the god of the new world!

Sayu(right outside the door evasdropping): Mom! Light forgot to take his medications again!


Me: Gah, I can't think of anything else to put! I guess this counts as a convosation.

Light(fist pumped into the air): Yes!

Me: What did you say?

Light: Uh, nothing.

Me: Mmm...L, you can have your way Light, now.

L: I can? Yay!

Light(slowing backing away into a corner): Uh, look, can we just talk about it?

Me and L: No.

L continues to approach Light. He grabs Light by the arm and drags him to the other room.

Light: No. No. No! NOOOOO!

L plays the last episode of Death Note.

Light(covering his eyes): No...this isn't happening. This isn't happening. I'm back home in my room, writing names in my Death Note. I haven't been abducted by a crazy lady...yes... that never happened.

Me: Light, you weren't abducted. I merely... persuaded you in an affective manner.

Light: You mean by barging into my house, breaking down my bedroom door, tying me with rope, putting duck tape over my mouth, tasering me, and carrying me here against my will is persuation?!

Me: In my book, yep.

Light(murmurs): Crazy lady.

Me: I'M NOT CRAZY!(eye twiches)

L: Can I continue with the torturing?

Me: Yes, you may.

Light: No you may not.

Me: C'mon, Light. He's just showing you the episode where you confess to being Kira, get shot at by Matsuda, and die of a heart attack after Ryuk writes your name in his Death Note. What's wrong with that?

L: Yeah Light what's-wait, Matsuda shoots Light?

Me: Yeah, he was about to kill him too if Aizawa didn't stop him. Damn it, Aizawa, Matsuda was being useful for once!

Light: And you're okay with that?

Me and L: Yeah.

Light: You too are insane.(looks at me) Hey, didn't you used to support Kira?

L looks at me with question in his eyes.

Me: Yeah, but that was before the final volume. After I finished the series, I became a fan of L. Now I wish he never died and you died instead.

Light(sarcastically): Gee, thanks.

Me: You're welcome!

Light face-palms.

Me: Okay this is getting nowhere!

L and Light: You barely noticed?!

Me bitch-slapping Light.

Light: Ow. Hey, why was I the only who got bitch-slapped?!

Me: Because 1) I hate you and 2) I can't mess up Lawliet's face.

L and Light look at me really fast.

Me: Oops, sorry L. But does it matter really if Light knows your real name. He can;t do anything because even if he writes your name in his Death Note, you won't die, right Light?

Light(looks up): Huh? Oh, yeah.

Me: What were doing Light? And don't you dare lie.

L: I believe he tried writing my name into his notebook.

Light(looking away): N-no I wasn't.

I snatch his death note from him.

L(looking over my shoulder): Light, you spelled my name wrong.

Light: I did?

L: Yes, now coming over here and I'll show you how to spell it correctly.

Light comes over with the Death Note and a pen.

L: Okay, this is how to spell it.(pulls out a baseball bat and whacks him with it)

Light falls to the ground unconscious.

L: Kill me once, shame on me. Kill me twice, get hit hard on the head with a baseball bat.

Me: Yeah! Wooh, if only that happened in the manga! I think we can call it a day, my brain hurts from thinking too much.

Me and L: See you soon.

Me: Want to get some cake?

L: sure, I'm always up for some cake.

L and I leave the room.

Light: He-hello. A little help here please. Sigh.


Me: So what did you think?

Light tries grabbing Death Note from me.

Me: Nh-uh-uh. You're not getting this back until the story's over.

Light: But, that could go on forever.

Me: My point exactly.

L: I like that idea.

Me: Thank you Lawliet.

L: Ryuzaki.

Me: Don't lie. I know it's Lawliet.

L: How do you know? Do you have the eyes?

Me(scoffs): I wish. No, the creators of Death Note released a How-to-Read guide shorty after it was completeled and it had your real name on your profile page.

L: Oh.

Light: Wait, so if i had this 'How-to-Read' guide thingy earlier in the series, then L would have dies without me having to met Misa?

Me: If you could magically turn back time after purchasing it, then yeah.

Light pulls out scrap of Death Note from his watch.

Me: I forgot he had that.(snatch)

L: Oh, so that's he killed Higuchi.(looks at the scrap more closely) Is that blood?

Me: Yes it is.

L looks at Light in horror.

Light: What? I couldn't have pulled out a pen and write his name in plainsight, now could I?

L: Technically, you did write it in plainsight. I was right next to you when it happened.

Light: Oh yeah I forgot.

I smack Light on the head.

Light: Ow, would you quit hitting me?

Me: No, it brings me joy to see you in pain.

Light: Sadist.

Me: Serial killer.

Light: Crazy lady.

Me: Schizophrenic.

L: OO, she got you there.

Light: How?

L: Well, at the beginning of the series, it was quite clear that you were suffering from schizophrenia when you compared yourself to a god.

Me: He's totally right.

Light: You're just saying that because you think he's cute.

Me bitch-slapping Light again!

Me: If you don't drop the attitude, the next chapter I write will be a yaoi one. Starring you and Lawliet.

Light looks at me with terror in his eyes.

Light: You wouldn't dare.

Me: Try me.

Light backs away.

Me: uh-huh, see, that's what I thought.

L: Um, shouldn't you be wrapping this up soon, you have school tomorrow.

Me: Oh, all right. And i was having fun too.

Light: You call this fun?

Me: Yes, yes I do.

Light shutters.

Me: I hope you enjoyed the first installment of Random Death Note Scenerios and Conversations! I guarentee they will keep on getting weider and weider each time because that's how my mind works. Please review at the bottom! Thank you! :D


*EDIT 11/23/12: I went back and corrected all of my grammar and spelling mistakes mostly because they were bugging the hell out of me.