Michael stood staring at his shaking hand. Eyeing the tattered shreds of one of his most prized possessions. Tears welling and choking back sobs. He knew who was responsible for this but he couldn't understand why. So as far as he was concerned he was going to stand there staring until he did. After all it had all started so innocently. Pasta night was in full swing . It was one of the rare times as of late that Michael felt like he had a home.
Every person he loved was in that kitchen. Plates were continuously being passed around and before he realized it he found himself sneaking glances at Brian across the table. Which is why he didn't notice the marinara sauce that was heading for his lap until it was too late. The hot substance clung to his shirt and burned his chest. He shot daggers at Justin. First he stole Brian then his mother then his friends. Wasn't that enough? The answer, Michael was finally starting to realize, was no. He felt it necessary to pour boiling liquid on him. Just to add insult to injury no doubt. That fucking kid was enough to drive him round the bend and back again. Michael shot up out of his seat and tried his best not to let Justin win. Tried to appear unaffected, like it didn't feel like his skin was a throbbing mass of shooting pain. He excused himself to grab some old clothes from his closet. Justin of course gushed his apologizes and fooled everyone. Everyone except Michael. Despite how much he wanted to believe that this so-called accident was actually that he couldn't help but notice the satisfied smirk that spread across the face that haunted him.
At that Michael trudged himself up the stairs and into "his" bedroom. As he stepped inside everything came flooding back. Even though Justin was temporally living there without his consent this room was still his. His entire life was there. That room had absorbed almost every single significant event in his life. He sat ono the bed and remembered the hundreds of times he fell asleep in Brian's arms cramped on the thrift store twin mattress. How many times had he changed tear-soaked or cum-stained sheets after Brian had gone home. This room had always been his safe place. His bat cave. But he was soon hit with a realization. This wasn't his anymore. It was Justin's, all of it. His family, his friends, his bed, his bat cave. With a disgusted feeling shot through him and he shot off the bed. He felt the lowest kind of dirty. His inner sanctum had been violated.
He was huffing towards his closet when he made the mistake of letting his eyes drift to the cork board. All his stuff. All his memories were gone. Replaced just like him. His eyes skimmed the surface, looking at all the things Justin thought were important memories. Concert ticket stubs, small sketches of Debbie and Brian, logos of bands Michael had never heard of and then he settled on a familiar image. Brian at sixteen. Out in the Novotny driveway. The day was sunny and Michael remembered that day as being the happiest of his life. That just happened to admit that his feelings for Brian were more than a passing attraction. That was the day Brian kissed him for the first time and that was the day he knew he would never love anyone the way he loved Brian Francis Kinney. It was then he was sure. He had met his soul mate.
Lost in a haze of remembrance he was slow to realize that half of the picture was missing. The part with him looking up at Brian lost in his smile. The sight had shaken him and he let his eyes slowly slide to the floor and land on the wastepaper basket. There he saw eight glossy squares sitting precariously on a week old banana peel. He sank to his knees and arranged the pieces like a puzzle. Soon enough he saw it. The goofy look of love. He saw himself in pieces. He gathered them into his hand and stared at the shreds of himself. His eyes darted from his hand to the picture of Brian that lay on the cork board. And this is where we meet our hero.
Soon enough the tears had given way and fallen. He silently cried until he was sure he couldn't cry anymore. He was in a daze. One he was quickly broken from by his mother screaming for me to rejoin them. He snatched the half picture of Brian and shoved it in his pockets next to the previous companion that now sat in pieces. A fitting metaphor if you looked long enough at the irony. He did the best he could to make himself presentable. He straightened his shirt and realized how long he must of been in his daze. The previously scalding sauce had become hard and dry. He cautiously walked down te stairs. Everyone was still there and only Brian noticed that he had come back.
"Hey Mikey, what took you so long?" his voice was light and happy.
"Nothing." He spoke into the silence using a voice that wasn't his own. This voice was dead.
"Mikey, what's wrong?" Worry seeped heavily into his tone.
"Nothing but I have to go now."
His voice was almost robotic. He went on autopilot kissing everyone goodbye except Justin and headed for the door. He was soon face with his enemy. The villain of this piece. The metaphorical two-face.
"What Michael no kiss for me?" Sarcasm was thick.
"No." He said trying to push past him but his efforts were thwarted and he was once again face with the cocky blonde.
"Justin?" His voice was quiet and angry. His jaw clenched.
"Yes, can I help you?"
"Yes actually you can move out of my way please." He spit the last would violently.
By now everyone had migrated towards the front door. They watched the two men in a seeming deadlock. Vic, Brain and Deb watched wide-eyed. They all recognized the tone in Michael's voice and they all knew what it meant. A quiet angry Michael was something to fear. But Justin wasn't smart enough to know that so he kept pushing.
"Nope. Sorry. No can do."
"Listen I know what you did okay. And it has caused me so much pain that if I was to unleash on you now there might be a hospital visit in your future. So I ask you again nicely. Please step aside?"
The evenness of his voice was enough to scare anybody, himself included. But Justin stood looked Michael square in the eye and laughed.
"Ahhh, you mean rip, rip ,rip." The chuckle still on his lips.
Michael nodded. Clenching his fists so hard that his fingernails were cutting half moons into his palms.
"Yeah I remember," he leaned close and whispered", Mikey you are so pathetic."
Then Michael snapped. He pulled back and gave Justin a good punch in the jaw before he could restrain himself. He took a quick look at his family. Shock written on all their faces but Brian's. His expression was blank. Michael looked him in the eye and knew he had to leave. Anger still bubbled beneath the surface. He backed his way out of the door and as soon as he heard the soft click and the muffled 'oh my gods' and 'are you okays' he broke into a sprint, running towards Babylon. He needed to stop thinking, even if it was just for a minute.
As Michael discovered it is quite easy to find a low job in the backroom even if you are covered in marinara sauce and sweat. His avoidance plan was working perfectly until he went to wipe his palms on his jeans and his hand slipped into his right pocket. The contents burned his fingers and soon he was cumming hard in the twink's mouth with silent burning tears streaming down his face. As soon as it was over he was out in the cold air again.
He made his way to the diner. He knew everyone would be going straight home after dinner and his mother didn't have to work until lunch. So he would stay until he was sure Em had gone to work, then he would go home and crawl into his bed and have a really good cry. Until then he had time to think, a cold cup of black coffee and his favorite booth. For now this was his bat cave, at least until sunup. Around four he slipped into a semi-sleep state and stayed that way until he felt the booth cushion shift and heard the clearing of a throat. He opened his eyes to a weary, tired looking Brian,
"Good morning Sunshine." he said flatly. Michael' stomach turned at the Sunshine part of the greeting.
" What do you want Brian?"
"What happened Mikey?"
"I did what I had to do."
"This jealously shit has to stop."
"You think was jealously?"
"Isn't it?"
"No."
"Then what?"
"He destroyed something very important to me."
" God damn it Michael what could be so important that you hit him. Christ Mikey I haven't seen you take a swing at someone in ten years!"
Michael huffed and pulled out the Brain part of the picture ad holding it up.
"Do you remember this day?"
Brian only nodded.
'Ma took this in the front yard. That was the day you kissed me for the first time and I knew that I really loved you. When I knew that I would always love you and that I would wait forever for you to love me the same way, even if that day never came."
Brian's breathing was uneven and his voice hitched.
"Mikey," a pause," where's the other half of the picture?"
Michael fumbled in his jean pocket and laid them in front of the man he loved. Brian's eyes widened and his nostrils flared.
"What happened?"
"Justin happened."
Michael's eyes softened and the tears started to well.
" I found it in the garbage in Justin's room. Thrown away, just like me. That's why I had to do it. He took the one thing that I valued above all else and he destroyed it. He cut me out of the picture. There's no place for me anymore. Brian, I'll always be waiting but he ruined any hope I had left to cling to. I always knew I'd be in your life, that was never a question. Well now he's asked. It's time to answer. Looking at that made me face the fact that I probably won't be the one to watch you get wrinkles and grey hair. I won't be the one you love. I won't wake up with you each morning or fall asleep every night. You don't want me to be all those things. I wish you did but you don't. I need a few days to heal. So I have to go. I'll see you on Friday night okay?"
Michael left a shell-shocked Brian in the booth, only turning back to make one last plea.
"Keep him away from me please. I'm not responsible for what might happen." and then he was gone.
Three long days had passed since THE night and he has done a pretty good job of avoiding his friends and family. Which proved to be an easy task when they were avoiding him as well. Life dragged on and he had ample time to play over the events of that Tuesday about two hundred times a day. He was running it for about the 98th time when his thoughts were interrupted and Brian was standing by the counted.
"Look Mikey, I know you said you wanted until tonight but this couldn't wait."
"What is it Brian?"
In seconds there were three wrapped gifts laid out marked 1,2,3.
"Open them in order."
Michael picked up the first package. There it was. His wet dream. Capt. Astro Vol. 1 Issue 1
He gasped " No Brian I can't."
"Yes you can and you will. Next one."
This one was quite a bit thicker. He unwrapped this one with caution. Soon he was staring at their picture framed and matted. It looked unscathed.
"How?"
"I have my ways. Next."
This one was smaller than the rest. Velvet played on his fingertips as he eyed the box. Soon its contents were shining in the glow of the florescent lighting.
"Brian what is this?"
"This my friend is offering you grey hair and wrinkles. This is my arms morning, noon, and night. I want you to be all these things."
By now a crowd of Big Q shoppers had gathered to witness the spectacle.
"Are you sure?"
"Yep"
"And you asking me to marry you?"
"Yep"
"Then do it right you jackass!"
Brian made his way around the counter, knelt in front of Michael and said eight words that changed both of their lives forever.
"I love you Mikey. Will you marry me?"
Five minutes, a nod and a kiss later. Dream had become reality. Michael didn't even give a second thought to the gawking shoppers or the fact that he had just been outed to all of this co-workers. Because in those five minutes he got everything he'd ever wanted.
In a word, he got Brian.
