I couldn't see a bloody thing.
Something caught my foot, and I stumbled, arms flailing in the darkness for something to catch myself on. My fingers trailed against the wall. Cropped velvet rasped against my fingertips, and something else- something warm and sticky. I hit my knees on the floor.
I brought my fingers near my face and sniffed them- they were coated in something heavily metallic, slightly meaty. I shuddered and swallowed hard.
Crawling on all fours now, I crept across a cold wooden floor, flinching every time the boards creaked under my hands. My nightgown caught under my knees several times.
Something followed me in the darkness.
I could hear it behind me, dragging something as it stepped slowly towards me. Somehow, I couldn't crawl fast enough. I couldn't get back to my feet. My arms and legs trembled with the effort, but it was more like swimming than crawling. The air was too thick, too heavy with the scent of blood.
Something touched my shoulder, high up near my neck. It was a gentle touch, a caress. But icy cold. I gasped and jerked away.
There was the sound of an exasperated release of breath. I fell backwards into a sitting position, my eyes searching blindly through the black as I scooted backwards.
My back hit the wall, and the thick cold seeped through my hair and my thin nightgown. The hand reached out again, stroking my jaw.
I choked out a sob.
There was the sound of fabric settling, and then two hands held my face between them. A lock of hair brushed my face, erasing the scent of blood with one of metal and ice.
I tried to turn away.
One hand moved away and grabbed the fabric of my nightgown over my chest, slamming me to the floor. There was a flash of light when my head hit the ground, and I could have sworn I could see it for just a second- death pale, eyes black as night...
The free hand clapped over my mouth, and I knew what would happen.
I'd had this nightmare every night for a week. It was a wonder that I hadn't woken up yet already this time.
I screamed through the hand and felt my real body jerk. The darkness melted away into sparks, and I struggled to open my eyes.
A hoarse scream erupted from my real voice.
Awake, at last, I sat up and hugged myself tightly. Only a sheet and a cotton nightgown covered me- the rest of my blankets were kicked to the foot of the bed. My pillow was sitting on the floor, next to my glasses that had been knocked off the nightstand.
I looked over at the other side of the room, hoping I hadn't woken Christine.
Thankfully, her bed was empty. I remembered now- she was with her family, away from school. It was winter break. She was in Germany with her aunt and uncle, enjoying a stay at a Black Forest lodge. I shook my head, trying to cast off the languor brought on by the nightmare. I was still disoriented.
I was one of the handfull that stayed at Cross over the holiday. A Christmas card from Christine sat on my nightstand, showing a merry snowman holding up his pipe in one hand and a book of carols in the other. It was the only decoration I had in my room.
Gulping in the chill night air, I pushed off my sheets with a shiver and swung my feet over the edge of the bed, sliding them into my slippers. My glasses, luckily, weren't scratched in the fall. I put them on and stood, stretching a little. Tying on my long fleece robe, I went out of the room, headed for the bathroom at the end of the hall. Perhaps I'd get some water.
To my surprise, the door was already open, and the light was on. I went inside, blinking at the bright flourescence, feeling the chill of the tiles seep through my thin slippers.
Yuuki was at the far sink, splashing water in her face. Catching sight of me in the mirror, she turned, water dripping from the tips of her hair. She was still in her school uniform.
"Cat," she said, "What are you doing up so late?"
I looked up at the gold-rimmed clock over the door- the hour hand pointed just past twelve. Early, early Christmas Eve morning, then.
"Bad dreams," I answered, walking towards the nearest sink and turning the ivory knob marked with a curling black C. A stream of water hissed into the drain. Taking off my glasses, I flicked my hair out of my face and cupped my hands under the stream, filling them with water.
Yuuki smiled at me in the mirror. "You too?" She sounded like she was musing more to herself than to me. I looked over at her. The flourescent lights made the circles under her eyes look even darker than they usually were. I smiled wanly.
"I've had them every night since classes let out," I said. Lifting my hands to my lips, I drank the cool, slightly chemical-tasting water. Filling them again, I splashed a handful in my face, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.
Drying off my hands and face, I put my glasses back on and smoothed back my hair.
"Merry Christmas," I said, turning out of the room. Yuuki nodded to me.
"Merry Christmas." she answered.
Jesu. Couldn't I be spared the nightmares on Christmas Eve? I'd had night terrors before, as a child. They would come back every so often, and then go away. Lately, they'd been getting worse, and I was seriously considering asking my parents to let me see a psychologist.
I didn't go back to my room. Instead, I turned down the hall and went down the stairs, headed for the chapel on campus. I had a favorite spot up in the balcony where the light came through the stained glass windows just right for reading and sketching. My fingers brushed the tinsel wrapped around the banister, rustling it softly. The rest of the dorm was decorated merrily by the rest of the girls living here. There were sprigs of holly and tea candles, unlit, sitting on the end of every stair. In the common room was a plastic evergreen, wrapped in lights and decked with bows and glass ornaments. Some of the doorknobs even had jingle bells tied to them.
The lobby was colder than the upstairs. The fireplace was empty, with a few ashes scattered in the bottom. Moonlight reflected off the snow through the windows, lighting up the room in icy pale blue. A cold winter's night that was so deep. If I wasn't so shaken from my nightmare, I would have stopped and just stared at how beautiful it was. It had snowed at sundown, and kept up for hours. We thought it would snow all night, but now the clouds had cleared, and the full moon and the stars were shining on the clean white bed of snow, framed by the tall icicle-rimmed windows.
Lifting my coat off the stand by the front, I took the side door leading to the brick breezeway between the dorm and the main building.
I hoped no one from the night class was cutting class tonight. I wanted my privacy.
Wrapping my coat around myself tightly, the black wool felt rough against my face, I walked quickly down the cobbled path. The lake was frozen over, and ice glittered around me on all sides. The main school loomed up in the distance like a Gothic cathedral of some Victorian novel. I'm sure the Bronte sisters would have loved to see this.
The gates at the end of the breezeway were locked, but true to its design, the school was built like a castle, and there was a postern gate. Usually, the side door was for the guard, leading up into the house over the gate, but there hadn't been a guard for the Sun dorms for years. I stepped into a tiny tiled room with a door on either side and a spiral staircase in the middle, ducked around the stairs, and went out the other side.
There was a main path for students into the school, but I didn't go that direction. There were gardens all around the school, and I took the path that wandered around to the side of the school, the side nearest to the Sun dorms that held the chapel. Reaching the small extension in the side of the school, I pushed through the heavy wooden door and shut it behind me.
The chapel was lit with candles on the altar- the ones left burning for Advent. I wasn't Catholic, but other students were, and most of the teachers. The ritual now, however, was a comfort. The warm, flickering light was soothing. Climbing the stairs into the balcony seats, I found my favorite spot in the far corner and curled up into a ball, trying to cover as much of myself as possible. The chapel was heated, but it was older than the rest of the school, and it wasn't well insulated.
Reaching forward, I pulled a book out of the back flap of the seat in front of me. The rest of the seats had their hymnals and the prayer book, but this one was one of my own. The Silmarillion, by J.R.R. Tolkien. It was a birthday present of a few years ago, from my mother. It was a beautiful leather bound copy, with illustrated panels and all the chapter titles written out in Elvish calligraphy under the English print. I flipped to the nineteenth chapter where I had left off last, marked with a bit of purple ribbon, and snuggled down to read for a spell.
Among the tales of sorrow and ruin that come down to us from the darkness of these days there are yet some in which amid weeping, there is joy, and under the shadow of death, light endures...
I had just reached the part of the chapter when Beren, hero of the chapter, had first laid eyes upon the beautiful Luthien, when I heard a small sound below that made me start violently. Marking my place, I peered over the seat in front of me. The choir loft and altar were still, the candles burning on silently. Slowly rising from my seat, I slid my book back into the pocket behind the seat and eased out of the balcony, moving as quietly as I could. My heart pounded painfully fast at being startled.
Someone touched my shoulder.
Nightmare still fresh in mind, I whirled around with a gasp.
But instead of the wraith in my dreams, behind me stood the president of the Night Class, a familiar face. Kaname held a finger to his lips and I swallowed, clutching my coat a little tighter around myself. It was a long coat, falling midway down my calf, but I still felt exposed. He looked at me sharply, and I tried to think of the right thing to say to avoid getting in trouble.
"Kuran-" I began, but Kaname shushed me.
"Don't speak," he said, in a voice that was more gentle than reprimanding. Something about the way he said it made me fall silent before I even realized what I was doing. Numbly, I closed my mouth.
Kaname reached towards me, not quite touching me, and my vision began to blur. Moving in an almost dreamlike way, the world tilted, and my eyes drifted shut.
The next morning, I awoke in my bed with my glasses on the nightstand and my slippers on the floor, everything in perfect order. The sun was streaming through the window, glaring off the snow with a softly golden light. I rubbed my eyes, vaguely remembering what had happened last night. It was all so fuzzy...
I wondered if I had merely dreamed going outside and running into Kaname.
Yawning, I stretched luxuriously. I had slept surprisingly well- did I even have a nightmare tonight?
Shrugging, I slid out of bed and went to my dresser, pulling out a set of plain clothes for the day. I thought I smelled cinnamon rolls downstairs from the dining hall. A perfect start for Christmas Eve morning.
I almost didn't notice the spot of half-melted snow just outside my door.
