A/N This is an origin story I wrote for my OC Samaura. I wanted people to get to know her because she will appear in SOME of my other fics. I'm planning on writing little origin stories like this for a lot of the other characters and tying them together. Leorai is my OTP and still is and once she gets in other stories you'll see how I make that possible!
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Why am I who I am today? That's a hard question. You see, it's a lot harder than you think. Things like that don't just have a simple answer. One thing doesn't shape a person's persona, who they are, why they feel the way they feel, why they think and believe things. It takes many different twists and turns and even then there's still more to it. I definitely wasn't always this way. I was quite different actually. I think the best place to start would be the day- I'm sorry this is really hard to think about- the day that dad- that dad died.
I was only 7 years old with a very happy outlook on life. I loved my parents and they loved me just as much. My dad was always like my best friend. This is kinda not usual but he actually was the person I wanted to be just like. I wanted to grow up and be 'just like daddy'. I remember kids at school laughing at me saying how stupid I was to want to be like my dad cause that's like, as they put it, 'wanting to be a boy'. I didn't mean it like that though, I just had a more broader and advanced outlook on life than them I guess. My dad was kind, funny, strong, fearless, and most importantly, my hero. Everyone wants to be like their hero right?
Anyway back to the day. My dad had been suffering from an illness which to this day I have no idea what it was. I remember my mom always saying 'daddy's sick but he's gonna get better.' Her eyes had this glassy look to them and I realized one day she was crying. I remember thinking if 'daddy's gonna be ok then why is mommy crying'?
I walked in after a long day of school and dropped my book bag on the table. I looked around and as usual my parents were in their room. Since dad had gotten ill, I'd spent most of my time alone. I heard my mother's voice call to me from upstairs.
"Samaura is that you?" She shouted from upstairs.
"Yes mommy." I'd respond happily.
She'd call me upstairs and I'd walk in and find my mom sitting next to my dad who was lying in the bed. My mom would always say how daddy's just sleeping but he had been 'sleeping' for weeks. I can safely assume now that he must have been in a coma.
"Come over and tell your father about your day." She'd say holding back tears. "He can hear you baby I promise"
I'd walk over and begin describing my whole day to my father's body. I honestly believed he could hear me and it felt nice to talk to him again. I would tell him about the homework I got and how annoying it was, funny things that had happened that day, and add to our list of things we have to do with each other before we die, titled, Things We Need to do Before We Die. I had recently changed the name of the list to Things We Need to do When Daddy Wakes Up. I used to wish on every eyelash I got and every shooting star I saw that 'daddy would talk to me again', but he never did.
Mom went out of the room fast to go get a glass of water and told me to wait with dad. So I sat there waiting and stared at his closed eyes begging them to open up. I always loved my dad's eyes and wished mine would look like his. I would say how 'when I grow up I'm gonna have eyes just like yours' and my dad would chuckle and tell me how 'anything is possible. Never stop dreaming tenshi' and then kiss me on the forehead.
Suddenly the thing that I called the wavy line machine, which was actually the heart monitor, started making a funny noise. Usually when I would hear it, it would be beeping, sometimes more slower than others, but always beeping. This time instead it was just stuck on one, long beep that wouldn't stop. I plugged my ears and yelled for my mom to come in. I heard her feet rushing up the stairs as fast as she could. I wondered why she was in such a rush, it was only an annoying noise, at least, that's what I thought.
Mom came barreling into the room screaming words in Japanese. There were tears streaming down her face and she was bright red. She started trembling as she leaned over my dad's body. She was shouting 'no no no' but soon it turned into a soft mumble that came out almost like a whimper.
I remember standing there and becoming so afraid. My mom was so upset that it made my heart start racing. I realized then that something bad had happened. I looked around the room as tears formed in my eyes. I had no idea what was going on and I hated every second of it. I just wanted my dad to wake up already and start talking. He needed to sit up and hug my mom and tell her everything is gonna be alright.
"Mommy," I had said quietly, "it's ok. Daddy will wake up soon." I thought I was helping her. Those were the same words my mom would say to me and it would make me feel better, so I figured they would help her too. After I spoke my mother turned to me, her face wet from her tears while more were still falling, she said very softly 'no tenshi.'
I was suddenly overcome with emotion. My whole world just stopped for a minute as I sat there and tried to figure out what that meant. My mom had never, no matter the situation, told me that everything wasn't going to be ok. I felt this immense sense of panic and fear come over me. Without the comfort of knowing that everything was ok, I had no idea what to do. I felt so scared. I needed to know what was going on. I looked at my dad, lying motionless on the bed, and then I felt a tear trickle down my cheek. That tear told me I had figured it out, but I didn't wanna believe it.
I fell to the ground and began sobbing. It was that uncontrollable sob you see in movies, but never want to have a reason to get. I looked up slowly, tears blurring my vision, and saw my dad lying still, death written all over his face. I screamed as loud as I could and so much anger and sadness and terror came out with it. I stood up and yelled in my dad's face.
"Get up dad. Come on just get up it's not funny anymore." I screamed as my mother watched, fear in her eyes. "Why? Why?" I shouted and I remember how much it echoed throughout the room. The sound of my words seemed to produce an icy, chill in the room that went up and down my spine. I sat there staring at my father, wondering how this happened. Why this happened. It made no sense to me, he was so young and strong, why did he die. Why didn't anyone save him?
My mother looked at me and breathed slowly. I stared back and neither one of us said a word. Then she leaned in and hugged me. I could feel in the hug, how much my mother was hurting, how helpless the situation was, and I hated every second of it. I realized then my dad was never gonna talk to me again, never do all the things we wanted to do together, and I could never look at his eyes again.
I remember the long beep I had heard earlier, was still going. I hated that beep so much, in my mind, that was what killed daddy. I looked at the heart monitor with rage.
"You did this. You killed my daddy." I screamed at the machine and kicked it. I had kicked it over and over, but it just kept on beeping. It seemed proud to have killed my father and I wanted it gone. That beeping was the worst sound in the world. It pierced my ears with more pain and loss than anything else in the world, I couldn't take it.
"Shut up already. Just shut up you, you murderer." I yelled as I plugged my ears and began balling. That was when my mother finally came over to me and embraced me. I trembled and shook under her touch as she mumbled comforting words to me, but I couldn't make her words out. I just sat there and cried with her until we fell asleep.
A/N There you have it! The first chapter. I really hope you guys like her and your comments and reviews ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED. Thanks so much for reading ;)
