Muggles Association of Columbia

Written purely out of love and

admiration for the Harry

Potter series.

FADE IN:

INT. AMBER'S DORM- DAY

AMBER, 19, red hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. Wearing

an over-sized t-shirt for the Weird Sisters and ripped

jeans.

She exits her bedroom into the living area of her dorm,

carrying her backpack over her shoulder.

She looks over at the kitchen, goes to her cabinet grabs a

few cookies out of a bag.

JESSICA, 20, a beauty queen wanna-be with perfect hair and

clothes that would look at home on the cover of a magazine.

She is also one of Amber's roommates.

She walks into the kitchen and grabs a soda from the fridge.

JESSICA

(mockingly)

Hey Amber, going to your nerd

meeting?

AMBER

I am Jessica- by the way how's your

newest pimple doing- ooh doesn't

look too good.

JESSICA

Jealous much? You know we all can't

be beautiful, we need smart people

too.

Jessica looks at the cookies in Amber's hand.

JESSICA

Are you sure you want to eat those?

Amber takes a big bite out of a cookies and swallows.

AMBER

Yup, are you sure you still want

that personality? If you act

quickly you might still be able to

trade it in for another.

JESSICA

Oh, like you're such a gem, at

least I have a boyfriend. I'm sure

someday you'll find someone who

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 2.

JESSICA (cont'd)

likes you, that is if you hit him

with a love spell.

Jessica turns around the walks back to her room as if she

just scored a victory, Amber pulls her cellphone out of her

back pocket.

AMBER

It's love potion, Muggle, not

spell.

Amber points her phone/wand at Jessica.

AMBER

(whispers)

Colloshoo

Jessica's feet inexplicably adhere to the ground, she stares

down at her feet trying to pull them off the ground, yanking

on her legs in an attempt un-stick herself.

Amber looks at her with amusement before flicking her phone

away and breaking the spell.

AMBER

(to herself)

If only you knew what I was really

capable of.

Jessica looks at the ground for a moment, searching for the

source of her sticking feet, before going into her room with

as much dignity as possible.

Amber continues to smirk and bites into another cookie.

INT. MUGGLE'S MEETING- DAY

About nine college students sit on bean bags, couches and

chairs in a big circle.

GLORIA, 20, has crazy, curly hair with thick glasses that

slip down on her nose. Her quaint dress if folded beneath

her.

She sits next to DRAKE, 22, with his hair expertly quaffed

and outrageously colorful clothes. He laughs with CRYSTAL,

19, who has the big, innocent eyes of a doe.

IRENE, 21, looks professional with short hair and clothes

that make her look closer to a professor than a student. She

is the Headmistress of the Muggle Association of Columbia.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 3.

Amber sits somewhat isolated, between VALARIE and ANNIE, she

leans back in her chair with her arms crossed, almost as if

she were being forced to attend the meeting.

QUINN, 20, with spiked hair, wearing a well-fitting sweater

and ripped jeans. He and HAYDEN sit on the other side of

Irene, pretending that they are almost too cool for everyone

else.

Irene clears her throat and all of them are focused upon

her, waiting anxiously.

IRENE

Right, so the cupcake this week is

cookies and cream, and-

CRYSTAL

Just tell us the riddle.

IRENE

Okay, here's the riddle. A ten foot

ladder is attached to a ship. The

rungs are one foot apart. If the

water rises at the rate of one foot

an hour, how long will it take for

the water to cover the ladder?

Every looks deep in thought, except Quinn who leans back

with a satisfied look on his face. Amber looks at Quinn and

scowls, irritated by his superior attitude.

IRENE

Quinn, do you want to answer?

QUINN

No, I think I'll give everyone else

a chance.

AMBER

(grumbles)

Show off.

Quinn looks at her and crosses his arms.

QUINN

You want to take a stab at it?

AMBER

Hey,I'm not in Ravenclaw, what do

you want from me?

Quinn smirks and looks around.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 4.

QUINN

Anyone else want to try?

Everyone shakes their heads, Amber just glares at him.

QUINN

The answer is never- the ladder is

attached to the ship and as the

water rises so does the ship.

IRENE

Good job Quinn, you win the

cupcake- again.

Irene hands Quinn the bag with the cupcake. Hayden gives

Quinn a high five, Gloria comforts a disappointed Crystal,

Amber crosses her legs and looks at Irene as if it were her

fault.

Irene gestures to the rest of the group.

IRENE

The floor is open if anyone would

like to discuss anything Harry

Potter related.

CRYSTAL

I read this Dramione fan fiction

last night and it's just- I am so

mad, because it completely made fun

of Hufflepuffs.

A few of the students look at each other, one struggles to

suppress a snort.

GLORIA

You Gryffindor's think it's so

funny, but look at Cedric Diggory

or Tonks, they just as brave and

smart as any Ravenclaw or

Gryffindor.

AMBER

(sarcastically)

Yup, you two absolutely terrifying.

Irene glares at Amber and then quickly claps her hands to

change the subject.

IRENE

Right, um, anything else people

would like to discuss- really

anything at all?

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 5.

VALARIE

I was re-reading The Goblet of Fire

last night and I began thinking

about what music each character

would listen to.

AMBER

(What is wrong with these

people?)

Really.

VALARIE

Yeah, I was thinking Draco would

listen to cool jazz.

ANNIE

No way, Draco would totally listen

to punk rock.

Amber looks up at the ceiling.

AMBER

Good god.

INT. DA'S HEADQUARTERS- DAY

Amber, Gloria, Irene, and Drake all enter a windowless room.

There are posters on the walls of quidditch teams and Uncle

Sam holding a wand and saying 'I want you for Dumbledore's

Army'.

Chairs and couches are scattered around the room, there is a

large bookshelf with copies of Defense Against the Dark Arts

and Curses for Dummies.

Amber sits down in a chair and crosses her arms.

AMBER

God, I hate those meetings.

DRAKE

(sarcastically)

We had no idea.

AMBER

Irene, remind me again why we waste

time on those stupid Muggles?

Irene grabs a quidditch magazine off the table and sinks

back into her chair.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 6.

IRENE

Because Amber, the DA needed a base

in Chicago and the best way to

cover up a bunch of teenagers

waving wands is to start a Harry

Potter club.

AMBER

Muggles Association of Columbia.

Yeah that's not an obvious way of

saying 'wizards, what no, we're

totally normal, we're Muggles, see

it's even in our name'.

Gloria and Drake sit next each other on the couch.

GLORIA

I like the name, it sounds really

sophisticated.

AMBER

You would Gloria, you actually like

the books.

GLORIA

Hey-

AMBER

They're also mostly fiction, I mean

everyone knows that Ron Weasley

died during his fifth year.

GLORIA

It's not a crime to enjoy a good

book.

AMBER

It was reckless, writing a book

about magic, telling basically the

entire world our secrets-

IRENE

It's pretty ingenious actually, if

anyone sees something, it's a Harry

Potter stunt. No one's looking for

something that they've already

decided doesn't exist.

AMBER

Like it's so hard to blend into the

Muggle world?

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 7.

Amber pulls out her wand and throws it up in the air,

staring at it intently. The wand transforms into a phone as

it lands in her hand.

AMBER

See.

DRAKE

Says the girl who came to the first

day of school wearing overalls and

a parka.

AMBER

Excuse me for not being a

Muggle-born, Drake.

GLORIA

You're excused.

DRAKE

We can't all be awesome.

Gloria and Drake high-five. Amber rolls her eyes, and looks

over at Irene.

AMBER

Please tell me we're practicing

today.

Irene looks at Amber with slight amusement.

IRENE

Let me do the update from the DA

first.

All three of them refocus their attention on Irene, eager

for any news.

IRENE

According to Flynn, most of the

Death Eater activity in the

North-East has quieted down. A few

aurors suspect that they're heading

West to form a base in California.

GLORIA

I don't know why they bother

anymore, Voldemort's dead- he's

been dead for years, it's over.

Amber shakes her head thoughtfully.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 8.

AMBER

No, Voldemort may have been in

charge, but the Death Eaters

function like a hydra, you cut off

a head, and two more grow in it's

place.

IRENE

Flynn wants us to be on the look

out for any activity in case they

decide to pass through Chicago.

Gloria sits up straight, biting her lip.

GLORIA

Do you think we're ready Irene, if

any of them decided to-

AMBER

Start killing random Muggles?

IRENE

Amber-

GLORIA

Don't say stuff like that.

Amber stands up with frustration, tosses her phone and

transforms it into a wand again.

AMBER

You can't pretend like it wouldn't

happen. Look, if you want to see if

you're ready, fight me.

Gloria looks shocked, but she stands up, determined and a

little angry.

IRENE

Amber, can you relax for one

minute?

AMBER

Irene, I spend every single day

surrounded by Muggles, pretending

that magic doesn't exist, that I'm

just a crazy nerd and that I'm not

special in any way whatsoever.

You'll forgive me if I need to blow

off some steam- 'kay?

Irene opens her mouth to argue and then nods in agreement.

Gloria takes out her wand, with a single wave all the

furniture moves against the back wall.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 9.

Drake and Irene move to the side, Amber and Gloria face each

other. They both to each other and stare with their wands

prepared, waiting for the other to make the first move.

AMBER

Stupefy.

Gloria jumps out of the way.

GLORIA

Calvario.

Amber ducks, a few hairs falling onto the floor.

AMBER

Seriously, the Hair Loss Curse! Is

that the best you can-

GLORIA

Glacius.

Amber dives to the floor, ice shattering against the back

wall.

AMBER

That's more like it- ascendio.

Gloria avoids the spell.

AMBER

Expelliarmus.

Gloria's wand goes flying out of her hand. Amber picks it

up, walks over to her, practically shoving the wand into

Gloria's hand.

AMBER

Let's go again.

DRAKE

Guys-

Irene tries to step between Amber and Gloria.

IRENE

You won, isn't that enough?

AMBER

I said, let's go again.

GLORIA

Amber-

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 10.

DRAKE

Guys, I have a headache.

They all look at the shaking Drake, he is sweating and his

eyes look wild.

They all spring into action, Irene waves her wand and brings

a chair behind him. He sits down, Gloria grabs a pillow and

carefully places it next to him.

Amber pulls the coffee table in front of him and shoves some

magazines aside. Irene goes over to the cabinet and pulls

out a crystal ball.

She places it on the table, Drake straights up immediately,

allows his hands to hover over the crystal ball. It begins

to flash rapid colors, all their eyes are fixed to it's

surface.

DRAKE

(hypnotic)

The King may be dead, but the

Prince's raise will be quickened.

All is not as it appears, bonds

will be tested and magic pushed to

its limits. One secret will destroy

while another will heal. The time

is drawing near, the choice between

one's blood or that of another.

Choose wisely.

Drake collapses onto the couch with a groan. Amber and Irene

lock eyes, both concern over the prophecy. Gloria grabs a

mug off the coffee table.

GLORIA

Aqua Eructo.

The mug fills with water, Gloria hands it to Drake. Amber

and Irene stand up and step away from the couch so Drake

won't hear them.

AMBER

New lines to the prophecy?

IRENE

I don't get it, for weeks, all he

says is stuff about things not

being as they appear, bonds being

tested, and secrets and now-

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 11.

AMBER

The King may be dead.

IRENE

That has to be Voldemort, but a

Prince?

AMBER

And what was the stuff about one's

blood or that of another?

IRENE

I don't know, but I don't like it.

FADE OUT.

END EPISODE 1