Writing this gave me emotions. I apologize. I haven't slept in a while so it might be wonky. I wanted to try my own 'Rose Says Goodbye' so here it is. I don't own Doctor Who. Here it is:
The Doctor smiled brightly at his companions, both of grinned back while gasping for breath. He and the ponds had been visiting an exceptionally advanced planet when they had accidentally sparked revolution by speaking a bit to liberally with a more rebellious group. This had, of course, resulted in an exciting series of events which led to their eventual necessary retreat to the TARDIS where they collapsed against the console.
Just then the TARDIS gave a shudder as it lifted off to the vortex causing them all to crash forward. Springing up and ignoring Rory's groans and Amy's yelling, he ran down the stairs to try to find what had triggered their take off. Pulling at wires he finally cried out victoriously when he found a set of wires connected wrong. Quickly repairing them he ran up to check the monitor but froze at the sight of his companions staring at a floating hologram reading 'Bad Wolf: Protocol 1' with direction to start the sequence by voice.
"Doctor? What going on? Explain!" Amy remarked still staring intently at the hologram. The Doctor swallowed thickly struggling to get past the lump in his throat as he was attacked by a sudden onslaught of memories. Her smile, her laugh, her crying, 'I love you', her as a glowing goddess to save him.
He closed his eyes briefly before replying "It's a message.. an important message I'd wager, given it's title..." and then he strode over to them and activated the message.
The hologram blurred out and was replaced by Rose Tyler dressed in the same outfit from when they'd met Satan. It couldn't have been three hours after they'd returned. They'd had a movie marathon, fallen asleep in each other's arms, but there'd been a 3 hour gap. He felt he lungs constrict at the sight. Rassilon he missed her so much. Then she started speaking.
"Doctor, it's me. It's Rose. For me we just got back from seeing Satan. He kept sayin' that I was gonna die in battle, and I know that you said that he was tryin' to get in my head...but I guess it worked. I'm scared..." She paused and as the three time travelers stood transfixed a small strangled sob was let loose. "I don't want to dye doctor..." She sobbed once more covering her eyes with one hand. She took a moment to gather herself. With a deep breath she wiped her tears and tried to smiled "Enough cryin', yeah? Like I said he kept sayin' I'm gonna die, so I thought...remember that time you sent me home? And you set up a hologram to say goodbye? Well this is mine. I might not get a chance to tell you so I need to make sure I do, so you get it eventually, so you can hear what I need you to hear. OK Doctor?" Even though she couldn't him, he found himself nodding as he stared at her, not noticing tears tracing their way down his cheeks. "Good. First of all I want you to know that I love you. I loved you with a leather jacket and big ears, I love you with your fantastic hair, and I'd love you with 3 heads and only one leg. Always. As long as I live and longer I will always love you, My Doctor." She paused again wiping a few stray tears that had fallen well she spoke. The Doctor, crying with her, remained oblivious to his own tears. She spoke again "Next, Never be alone. Please. Find Jack, meet someone new, just please I want you safe and you need a companion to be safe. Please if you won't do it for you do it for me, my love. Please." Another sob escaped and she covered her mouth. in the background they heard loud singing start, causing Rose to chuckle, a watery sound. "That's you, taking a shower. OK, Next. This one's a bit embarrassing so don't laugh. I don't know if you love me too. But if you do or don't please after I'm gone love again, find someone to love you that you will love in return. I want you to be happy. I thought with Mickey, that I knew what love was, what happiness was. But then I met you and... You had me from run. Just watching you fix up the TARDIS makes me feels so happy, it's like nothing I ever felt in my life. You are the most beautiful man I have ever met. An' don't even start on the 'I'm not a man, I'm a Time Lord' bit you daft old alien. Please find someone. It hurts to think of it for me. You with someone else but it's so much worse to think of you all alone in you're TARDIS." She nodded to herself. and this time didn't wipe the tears that had escaped. "OK so if you're not laughing from that last bit, this one really important so listen up. I want you to remember that I chose this life. I chose running, aliens, Daleks, Cybermen, Slitheen, the Gelth, all of it. It that's how I go it's not your fault I chose this and I love you so don't think for a second that it's your fault." A sob from both Rose and Doctor "I love you. I love you from the very start of the very first universe to the very end of the last universe. I love you so much. I loved you enough to risk my life looking into the TARDIS and even though it burned I'd do it again in a heart beat for you. My Doctor." Every sentence was punctuated by a sob now. The singing in the back ground had stopped and they heard a voice calling Rose's name. Her sobs worsened. "This is it Doctor. That's you now. I have to wash my face and change and stop crying. This is my last chance. So here it is I love you remember what I've said. Always, My Doctor." And With that the hologram faded out even as the still sobbing Rose Tyler Blew a kiss to the future and waved.
In the current console room Amy was crying into Rory's shoulder, while he cried into hair. the Idea of have to record such a message for Amy. The pain of trying to find the words. The Idea of receiving such a message. Then the agony on the Rose's face as she spoke, the pain in her sobs. Beside them the Doctor fell to his knees sobbing, raw agony burning him as he gazed at the space she had occupied moments before. eventually his broken sobs dragged Amy from her own private agony enough to wrap an arm around him. She felt Rory settle next to her and wrap an arm around him. As his sobs slowed and his words became clearer they managed to make out what he kept repeating "Rose. My hearts, please come back to me. Please Rose Tyler. I love you so much. Rassilon please Rose Tyler come back to me. I can't do it with out you I'm trying please. I can't I want you back it's like there's nothing left inside. Nothing to love with. How do I find someone new to love when you have both of my hearts. Please."
The Ponds held him for hours wishing they could help. Weeks later River managed to corner the Doctor in the console room and question him about his shift in behavior, unwavering despite the pleading looks from her parents. Then he answered. "Sense you've never asked about the 905 years before you knew me. About my love before you rammed in and practically forced me to marry you. I care a great deal about you but there have been people I loved more then I can express with words. Recently one of them cropped up to say goodbye. I had forgotten the raw agony of losing her. i might need sometime to adjust the return of the pain. I hadn't worried about her in year and now I feel agony as though every part of me capable of love is burning in an eternal white hot flame. I'm sorry but I just can't right now. I'm trying but every time I close my eyes I can see her again." River stared at him looking hurt but nodded and left.
It wasn't until she came came by weeks later to announce a trip to the Library planet that He seemed to move past all that had happened taking her to the sing towers before she left. Then he returned to the Ponds and The TARDIS and they went on exploring the universe for years. And they tried to help but there was nothing to be done for the Time Lord with 2 broken hearts.
