Mossmask: Turned out ENTIRELY differently then what I'd been aiming for. Oh well. *shrug*
Please don't flame me because - ...actually, at this point it wouldn't really matter. I'm gonna be on hiatus for ages, and don't give a crap about negative comments anyway, so huh.
But anyway, I hope that there are actually some positive comments, in any case, because that would mean people actual liked it, which is always a plus. Bla bla bla, I'm out of things to say, whatever, enjoy.
~Cya on the other side
It was a quiet day. Quiet days had become increasingly rare between the two of them. It wasn't often that they had time to simply hang around and relax anymore. Tails was sitting in a large, over-cushioned recliner chair, enveloped by pillows and his own tails, reading a book. He kept finding himself glancing up at his hedgehog companion however, who at the moment, was standing at the window.
He'd been standing there for a good 15 minutes. It wasn't often that Tails got to see Sonic standing still for so long. He wondered what he might be thinking. "Penny for your thoughts?" He didn't even realize he had spoken aloud until Sonic flicked a blue ear and replied.
"Nothing profound, if that's what you were hoping for." He answered lightly, still not turning away. To be honest, he was just feeling bored. No trouble had popped up lately – which honestly, had to be counted as a good thing. Besides, he could still go on an adventure without needing some villain to fight. He could travel anywhere in the world in a matter of hours. And contrary to popular belief, he was able to slow down and appreciate things.
The only thing stopping him at the moment was rain. It had been raining for nearly four days now, with no let up. Roads were flooded, the ground was complete mush, with mud halfway up to his knees. Tails could barely walk in the stuff. It was miserable, wet, and impossible to run in. Down right frustrating just to walk in it. So he was resigned to sticking it out with Tails. At least he had good company. He just wished the weather would let up at some point. It had been a week since he'd seen the actual sun.
Tails had gotten distracted again by his book, but found himself unable to concentrate as he let his mind wander. He didn't think to keep it in check and all too soon voiced one of those thoughts wandering through his mind. "Sonic, do you ever think about dying?" A second later he realized what he'd said and wondered why he'd brought it up at all. It wasn't exactly something that he was comfortable speaking about, and Sonic knew that.
Sonic finally turned away from the window and raised an eye ridge at the fox. "Uh, I suppose so. Why?"
Tails shrugged self consciously. "I was just wondering. I mean... with what we do and everything... you must think about it sometimes."
Sonic paused. "Do you?"
Tails gave a slight nod, looking up at him with those wide, blue eyes. He suddenly seemed younger, and Sonic found himself remembering that the fox was, after all, only eight years old.
"Does it scare you?" He wondered, genuinely curious.
Tails nodded again. "Of course it does! Doesn't it scare you?" He asked, looking puzzled.
Sonic shook his head, sitting down on a couch across from Tails, swinging his legs up over the armrest, crossed at the ankles. "Nope. Why should it? Nobody wants to die, really. But everyone has to eventually. No point being scared of something you can't really help, is there?" He glanced at Tails to gauge the kit's reaction.
"I... I guess not. But a lot of the time you could prevent it, y'know. By not doing... dangerous things. Sticking yourself right into a life and death situation... that's almost like tempting fate."
Sonic frowned, troubled by the fox's line of thought. "You don't want to stop, do you?" He asked. Of course, he wouldn't try to encourage Tails to put his life at risk, quite the opposite. But... he still wasn't completely comfortable with where this situation was heading. To his relief, Tails quickly shook his head.
"No, no, that's not it at all. I just... I wonder if we'll ever regret it."
"What, helping people?"
"Well, when you put it like that..." Tails trailed off, somehow managing to portray discomfort and amusement at the same time. "Sonic," he spoke up again, after a long moment, "how do you... how do you think..." He trailed off, not really wanting to talk about this openly, let alone with his surrogate big brother. But at the same time, he knew he wanted to get it off his chest, and there was no one who would understand that better then Sonic. "How do you expect to die?" Tails finally finished, while Sonic waited patiently.
"Heroes never die." He grinned back. But seeing the fox's serious expression he frowned and tried to meet it, coming up with a more suitable answer. "Well... I don't know. I suppose I don't. You never know. It's not something you can just foresee and try to avoid – why?" He cut himself off as something occurred to him. "Do you expect to die somewhere?"
Tails shook his head. "No... it's not that... I'm just... I can't help but think about it. And what if you're not there? Or... what if you are? I mean... there's no positive out of this situation..." He trailed off. Sonic got his meaning perfectly. Tails was afraid of not having Sonic around when he needed him. But at the same time, he knew exactly what that would do to Sonic. For a second, Sonic was surprised by his lack of faith. Both in Sonic's being around whenever he needed him, or in his own ability to carry on with his own life. That surprise died a few seconds later after a moment of thought where he realized that both of those doubts were well warranted.
No one could be around all the time. Especially Sonic – he was a free spirit, and Tails had his own independence. Something could very well happen when the two of them were apart. As for the second account, well. That was one of those things that Sonic refused to bother thinking about until, and if, it ever came to it.
But Tails wasn't finished. "And... I mean... we're two different people. And we're not always going to be... around for each other. So what happens when one of us is gone? I can't imagine the one without the other. It's just not right. So to know... that eventually, one day... it will come to that." He trailed off again, shutting his eyes, and was thus surprised when Sonic shoved his way into the chair beside him and put a hand over his shoulder.
"Hey, why are you worrying about all this now?" He asked, frowning, and trying to get the fox to look him in the eyes.
"It's not just now. I mean, I can't help but think about it. Can't you? That eventually... one of us won't be around. And it could be sooner rather than later. You just... you just don't know. I don't want either of us to have to be alone."
Sonic sighed. "That's exactly right, Tails. You just don't know. But we'd never be alone. You've come a long way kid. You'd still have plenty of friends."
"But I wouldn't have you." He muttered quietly, facing away from Sonic but certainly not pulling away from the hedgehog's touch. Sonic had no idea how to reply. He knew he should be comforting, but had no idea what to say. He was both touched and disturbed by the sentiment, and wasn't even entirely aware of why.
"That's just what life's like, bud. It's unpredictable, and everyone makes their own choices. You never know what it's gonna throw your way, but I just try to take it day by day. And yeah, something could happen to me, but I'm okay with that. It's not gonna stop me from doing what's right, or from doing what I want to do. I'm not going to live in fear. I'm just going to live."
Mossmask: Of course there was a comment about the ending being a letdown... I was totally expecting that.
And I'm not trying to argue that point or justify it, because I agree completely.
I wrote this a while back and it's been sitting on my computer - one of the main reasons I never did post it was because I was still holding out for a more satisfying was to conclude. As it is, it's left completely open ended. Which isn't exactly what you want with this sort of fic.
I'll still be looking for ways to make this... better... if anyone has a suggestion on how to better close it. Though I'm not just saying "fix my problems for me." In any case, this is me, as a writer, falling back to an old standard. So a formal apology for the lack of decent closure.
~Dash Out
