A.N. Hey Everyone! SO this is just going to be a for-fun fanfic that i'ma do in my spare time. Hope you enjoy! Don't forget to R&R!!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of Holly Black's characters. The Cloaked Brethren are mine thank you very much. I made them. The other characters, not so much.
Warning: Language. Maybe SEX in later chapters, I'm not sure yet
Once Upon a Midnight Dreary.
Kaye looked up at Roiben, sitting there on his throne. Gods, she loved him so fucking much. It really was pissing her off though. What was pissing her off you ask?
He was being fawned over by gorgeous High-court fey. While she was down here. At a table. Because all she was just a fucking pixie with ugly green skin and hair and wings and black eyes.
She paused. Fuck now she was spouting off some kind of emo shit. Just great. Sighing, she turned to pull a hobgoblin off of a phooka. It was really quite entertaining to watch till the phooka's eyes bulged out so much that they were almost popped from it's annoying goat-like skull.
"Turpentine. He didn't mean it. What are you doing, listening to the taunts of a phooka anyway?" she pointed to the escaping monkey-thing. "Worthless pieces of shit aren't they?" the phooka turned around and promptly flipped her off.
"Yess. But he's so stupids that I was going to kill him for Lady Kaye." he bowed. She laughed
"Lady Kaye my ass. What did I do? I used pixie logic to trick the King of the Unseelie and Seelie courts." she covered her ears as a bane-sidhe wailed its way past.
"But you won your quest, did you not? You are the only one of all the fey that can lie!" his owl eyes widened, looking up at her in something akin to hero-worship.
She sighed. Then paused. She was sighing a lot lately. Must be the sexual frustration. Then she looked down at her cup. Or the Melancholy Wine she had drunk alongside the Mushroom Wine. "It was a trick, Turpentine. I cannot lie. I can lie but I can't." she bit her tongue. The Mushroom Wine was making her talk. Then the Court seemed to quiet...which was weird since there was always someone getting killed or tortured here.
She watched as a centaur walked by all the tables, the unruliness of the Dark Court quieting as he went past.
Tall dark and horsy. A face only a mother could love. Why was he here?
"The Dark Court greets an Emissary of the Cloaked Brethren." Roiben's quiet voice snaked through Underhill. Amazing how he never seemed to need to raise his voice a lot here.
The centaur bows. "And the Cloaked Brethren greet you, Roiben, king of the Two Courts." pulling a long cylindrical object from his side-bag (or saddlebag? She giggled at the thought, then stopped herself. Damn Mushroom Wine!)
"I am here to charge the pixie Kaye with a death sentence. The charges are blasphemy before the Great Mother Danu." he turned to the fey of the Dark Court. Kaye shrunk down in her seat.
Roiben burst from his. "What do you mean?"
The centaur paused, undaunted by the fury of the only elf that ruled two courts in the world. "We cannot tolerate a Faerie that can lie." he stated simply. "She must be dealt with before she ruins our world, and breaking the ancient laws by lying, she has started to unravel it. The tapestry of this world will fall, thread by thread, unless she is destroyed utterly."
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A.N. So was it good? I'm not going to update for a very long time unless i know it's good. Tell me, shower me with you acccolades of praise. Heck, get down and worship me. My ego needs feeding. JK I'll update whether i gedt Revs or not. I just really like them!! 3
