The Sleepover, Dracula vs. Lord Hater
Author's Note: I own nothing. The story of Dracula is Bram Stoker's. Also, in this one, the brides are just servants, not girlfriends or whatever the most appropriate term for the three is.
A blood red moon illuminated the planet Bran, where Bran Castle sat among the dense forests and jagged cliffs. Both the moon and castle were so bold and daunting in the night, as if fighting for dominance, that no alien, even with the sharpest eyes(s), could have spotted one star in the pitch black sky.
It was midnight on planet Bran, and every living, breathing creature there seemed to know that fact. From the pestering space flies to the ravenous beasts, all the creatures were asleep.
All the perishable ones, that is.
And on this eerily calm night, two friends, one sluggish and the other wide awake, arrived and stared at Bran Castle.
"Oh my gravy..." Wander, an orange star nomad, uttered in awe, before hopping off of his friend's back and raising his twangy voice. "This is where we're spending the slumber party?! WHOO HOO!"
His friend, a blue zbornak named Sylvia, tensed up all of a sudden and tried to cover Wander's blabbering, non-stop mouth. She knew what kinds of beasts lived on Bran, and she also knew she was way too exhausted to put up much of a fight for both of them. So, in order to avoid a chow down, Sylvia knew Wander had to lower his voice.
"Wander! Shush!"
"I'm sorry, Sylvia. I just can't help it! I haven't been to many sleepovers!"
"Wander..." Sylvia released a groggy yawn before continuing. "I can't believe you're even doing this." The reason why Wander was so chirpy and active at midnight was because he decided to sleep during the whole day to prepare himself for the night. The reason why Sylvia was so sleepy and groggy at midnight was because she could not stop worrying and wondering if this was all just an elaborate threat - a threat too great for them. Therefore, she could not get any sleep throughout the day.
"I mean... Isn't it a little odd that this... Rad sent you an invite, and you don't even know him? And that it starts at midnight? A little inconvenient, don't you think?"
Wander shrugged and gave her an innocent smile. "I can't say no to a new friend, Syl." He took the invitation out of his hat. "Besides, this invite says it'll be tasty! That must mean he has yummy food!"
"Tasty?" Sylvia frowned bemusedly. "Huh. Weird adjective for this case."
"And scary!"
"Scary?"
"And fun!" Wander squealed and jumped up and down euphorically. "I LOVE haunted house themed sleepovers! How did he know?!"
Knowing it was futile trying to talk Wander out of entering the sketchy-looking castle, Sylvia relented and spoke up quickly. "Fine. But I'm going with you -" She dragged her feet over to the castle, but Wander blocked her path.
"Sylvia, you can't. I'm sorry but it's for guy's only."
Sylvia stood at her full height and frowned down at her best pal stubbornly. "Wander, I'm not leaving you with some stranger. He could be a creep. I'm already suspicious since a bat gave you the invite - and in midday, no less! No bat does that!"
"Hmm... Okay." Sylvia visibly relaxed until Wander started to grin mischievously. Then, it hit her; it was dress-up time.
"Oh no."
"Oh yes, Syl - Silas!"
A few minutes later, Sylvia was dressed in an over-sized, navy blue jumpsuit with the words Got Nothin' On This in sloppy, white letters on the front. She also wore a matching baseball cap and a curly red mustache.
"You look pretty convincing!" Wander complimented his sour-faced friend, before checking his sleepover kit in his hat. "Sleeping bags? Check! Toothbrushes? Check! Bag of chocolates? Check! Bag of extra popcorn? Check! Pillows? Check! Slippers? Check! Sandwiches -"
"Sandwiches?" Sylvia raised her eyebrows.
"He might be one of those people who gets hungry in the middle of the night. We have to be open-minded!" Wander put on his hat and grinned excitably. "I think we're all done here. Let's go party!" And with that, he skipped merrily to the intimidating, stone gray, twin doors of the gargantuan castle. Then, he knocked thrice. "Helloooo?"
The door unexpectedly creaked open, and no one greeted them. The duo stepped inside, where it was so dark they could barely see each other. Then, as soon as they entered, they heard an assortment of scratching, and the doors slammed shut.
Sylvia gasped so loud they heard echoes for several minutes. "Okay... S-Suspicions confirmed. Getting creepy, and he's probably not home so how about we - "
Although he jumped as well, Wander quickly recovered and gave Sylvia a playful grin. "Oh, relax! Everything's fine. Though I gotta give props to Rad. This is going swell so far!"
Suddenly, all the black candles in the room lit up, forming a circle of white flames around Wander and Sylvia. Then, a slim, pale, attractive woman with luscious, wavy, blue-black hair slid gracefully down the foyer and bowed.
"Hello..." Her vivacious eyes scanned them. "Sir Wander and his... friend."
Near Bran Castle, an infamous, skull-faced space ship landed on Bran. Lord Hater, one of the most notorious villains in the entire galaxy, emerged from the ship with his third-in-command, Commander Peepers, and his watchdogs.
Peepers fought the urge to yawn as he caught up with his lord. "Sir, are you sure you want to attend this... slumber party?" It sounded a little childish to the monocular commander, but more importantly, it also sounded fishy. "It could be a trap!"
Lord Hater groaned and gave Peepers a dirty look. "I know it's a trap, Peepers! That's why I'm going - to give him the element of surprise and get my old place back on the Galactic Villain Leaderboard."
Peepers perked up at this tidbit of news. "Excellent! Great thinking, sir! But what's your plan?"
Lord Hater paused to give instructions, and Peepers ordered everyone else to stop as well and listen. "Some watchdogs will surround that stupid, wannabe gothic castle." Hater began. "Peepers and I will walk in with weapons hidden. We'll enter through the front. Once we're in, once I give the signal, before he attacks, we will nab him and attack!" His army cheered him on quietly so that their enemies would not hear them.
"Excellent, sir!" Peepers praised. "Once you defeat Rad and conquer his dreary planet, you'll be number ten on the board again!"
The eager leader and some of his watchdogs crept over to the castle grounds. The rest of the watchdogs stayed on the ship, ready to rescue their lord and co-workers and abort the mission at any second. Then, with ropes and impressive flips, the watchdogs near Hater crawled and climbed surreptitiously to every window and door of the castle.
Unbeknown to Hater and Peepers, who marched up to the front entrance, all the watchdogs surrounding the castle were instantly knocked out cold and nabbed.
"Sir, it's customary to knock twice on this planet but if you like to take risks -" Lord Hater unceremoniously tore the door out of its hinges, burnt it to a crisp, and stormed inside.
"That..." Peepers gulped. "That works, too." He followed his lord, and the door mysteriously reappeared and slammed behind them, leaving them in the unforgiving dark.
Hater flinched as he felt something clutching his robe. But then he groaned irritably as he realized it was only Peepers. "Peepers! Let go of me!"
"S-Sorry, s-sir! I - I just hate the dark!" The poor commander cried frantically, his tiny fists clenching the fabric with all his might.
Hater, however, was unmoved. "Don't be a wimp." He roughly shook Peepers off of him and walked a few steps to the left. "It's only - AHHHHH!"
"Sir?" Peepers trembled and panted when he realized Hater was missing. He followed Hater's tracks and soon found himself in the same predicament: falling to an underground pit. "AHHHH!"
They both landed in a massive cage, where a balding, demented man with pale, chalky white skin, yellowed teeth, and black eyes stared at them with unrestrained excitement and glee.
"Greetingssss!" He crawled over to them. And to the pair's disgust, he picked up a dying fly and munched on it. "Me name is Renfield, mortal flesh and bones. And the master cometh for thee..."
Meanwhile, two more pale, beautiful women welcomed Wander and Sylvia. They all wore long, matching crimson gowns with slits at the legs. Wander blushed bashfully as the women complimented them innocently, while Sylvia just narrowed her eyes.
"Wander? I thought this party was reserved for men only."
"Well, these kind women are obviously Rad's sisters. Am I right, ladies?"
"Of course," the one with blue-black hair agreed.
"Whatever you say," the one with straight, ash blonde hair purred.
"Our... brother will be down here shortly," the one with curly red hair assured them.
"Great!" Wander cheered, taking out his slumber party kit from his trusty hat. "Who wants chocolate? Ooh! And I also have sandwiches: Mustard, mayo, cold-cut, egg salad, classic PB and J, cheese and garlic - " The three women suddenly recoiled as if Wander had struck them, making Sylvia even more wary.
Wander noticed this as well and quickly put everything back in his hat. "I'm so sorry! I -"
"We have refined tastes," one hissed.
"But don't fret, darling."
"We just looove having company." One of them tried to pet Wander on the head, but Sylvia protectively pulled him closer to her and gave the woman a bit of a distrusting glare. She did not trust any of these girls one bit.
Then, Sylvia noticed something. All three women had unnaturally scarlet red eyes. And Sylvia had a gut feeling that something more twisted than chromosomes played a role in this.
"Jade! Cassandra! Vixen!" Someone roared from the top of the staircase. "SCATTER!" The three women quickly ran off, and a man dressed in a black suit descended down the stairs. He had slick black hair, the palest skin, and red eyes - eyes akin to the women's.
As Sylvia watched him approach, she instinctively placed Wander behind her. "Not a very brotherly brother, is he?" She didn't know whether she was making light of the situation for Wander or herself.
The handsome man gave them a warm smile. "Greetings, my dear guests." He knelt down on one knee and gave both Wander and Sylvia kisses on the back of their hands. (When he wasn't looking, Sylvia, wiped her hand on her jumpsuit.) "I am Rad. Let me show you to your room." They ascended up the stairs.
"Wow…" Wander marveled at every painting they passed in the hallway. "Your house is huge and very well-decorated! And…" He finally processed Rad's last comment and squealed with delight. "And... Our own room?! Sy - Silas, isn't this fantastic?!"
Sylvia did not miss the predatory look in Rad's eye as he glanced at her.
Creepy scuz monkey. "Wonderful."
Lord Hater and Peepers barely made it out of the underground prison. They had managed to crawl out of the trap door that took them there in the first place.
Peepers fearfully sealed the trap door shut, while Hater was seething at it.
"Stupid trap door," he mumbled bitterly. They began exploring the castle, and Hater spotted the impressive collection of armory. "Stupid weapons!" They crossed a torture chamber. "Stupid torture chamber!" Hater was about to blow a fuse when he heard women giggling upstairs. "And hot girls?!" Flushing and foaming with anger, he grabbed a mallet and hit a portrait of Rad, breaking it into several pieces and stomping on them like a child.
"WHY - " Stomp. "IS -" Stomp. Stomp. "HE -" Stomp. "SO COOOOOOL?!" Peepers, who was used to Hater's raging fits, just watched him, waiting for the tantrum to end.
"Okay…." Taking a massively deep breath, Hater began to calm down and stopped destroying the remains of the painting. "It's all good... I bet he doesn't have an enemy like Wander."
Lord Hater began thinking about that wandering weirdo, about how much he hated him, of course. But recently, Hater grew insanely obsessed over Wander because his most hated enemy simply wasn't bothering him enough. Only a few weeks ago, Hater would've loved to hear that Wander was pestering him less and less, but now… Conquering planets and crushing hopes and dreams simply wasn't the same without his enemy.
Peepers casually mentioned that it had to do with the rising number of enemies. The commander quickly figured out that Wander simply had other enemies besides Hater to turn to the good side.
"But that only makes our jobs easier, sir!" Peepers chirped. "You should be happy about this!"
Why wasn't he happy about it? Was it because having an enemy gave Hater a purpose? Was it because Wander realized Hater was winning and Hater would never turn good?
Or… Was Hater slowly realizing that Wander was winning because Hater almost, dare he even think it, missed him?
The idea was repulsing to the skeleton, and yet, thoughts of Wander remained intact in his mind.
Hater was shaken out of his musings when he heard a familiar voice squeal. "You have fangs?! That is amazing! But how do you eat?"
There was an awkward silence. Then, a deep, velvety voice crooned, "Don't worry about me, dear Wander. I will be fine."
Hater saw nothing but red again. "WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?!"
"Shhh!" Peepers tried to silence his lord's angry, indignant shouting, but they were quickly heard and spotted by the three brides. They eyed them like a new entrée.
"Lord Hater…"
"Good evening…"
"The master is expecting you…"
Meanwhile, Wander, Sylvia, and Rad were all in the guest room, where there were two king-sized beds and a fireplace. Sylvia finally put two and two together.
"Wander, run! This guy is Drac -" She suddenly felt her whole body droop and turn numb. Her mind drew a blank as she stared in Rad's penetrating eyes.
"You're getting sleepy, my love." Rad told her softly. "Sleep. Sleep…."
"Sleep…" Sylvia obeyed and fell on the bed, snoring instantly.
Wander smiled sweetly at his friend and draped the blankets over her, oblivious to the danger beside him. "Aww! Boy, didn't know she was so tired!" He turned to Rad. "So, it's just you and me, huh? What do you wanna do, Rad? Pillow fight? Makeover? Binge watch?"
Rad grinned wickedly at his unsuspecting prey and draped an arm over his shoulders. "I was thinking we could… see how the girls are doing."
Wander nodded eagerly. "Okay!"
"Now you just wait here and I'll go get them." He snapped his fingers, and bed sheets wrapped around Wander's wrists and ankles, tying him to the bed beside Sylvia's.
"Oh…" Wander studied the sheets with a puzzled frown until it clicked. "Oh! This is part of the haunted house theme, isn't it?"
Rad scratched his head. They weren't kidding when they said he was a clueless one, were they? "Er… Sure. Whatever helps your blood drain faster." He kissed the top of Wander's head to help expedite the transformation, but Wander didn't bat an eye. Strange… Most aliens in no commitment fall victim to that. Unless… But he has no lover! It's not that zbornak! I have checked with countless!
Shaking his head, Rad exited the room. A few seconds later, the three brides appeared and sat on the bed with Wander.
"Hello again." Jade stroked his head.
"Enjoying the party?" Cassandra asked, slapping away Jade's hand so she could pet Wander's head.
Wander grinned shyly at them and nodded. "You guys are all so polite and courteous. Thank you for inviting us!"
"No problem." Vixen eyed his beating heart like it was candy.
"I hope your friend sleeps soundly." Jade giggled at Sylvia, who was now drooling a little in her sleep. "She drools like Cassie."
Wander sighed, shaking his head. "She's awfully tired, I'm afraid. I wish I was more considerate, but I just couldn't wait to meet Rad."
Cassandra giggled and stared into Wander's eyes, hypnotizing him. "What a gentlemen!"
"What a delight!" Vixen and Jade began hypnotizing him, too, their eyes shining with insatiable hunger.
"I wonder if your blood is as sweet as your tongue."
"S-Syl…" Wander fell limp on the bed, and the women kissed and petted his head. To their amusement, the star nomad grinned and purred like a cat.
"It's a shame we have to hurt such a precious creature," Jade whispered.
"Master's orders," Cassandra reminded her.
Vixen laughed triumphantly. "The master's new servant, the purest in the galaxy, is finally ours!"
"DISPERSE!" The three brides crawled off the bed, and Rad Dracula cupped Wander's chin. "Open your eyes, Wander." Wander did, and he smiled sleepily at the head vampire.
"Hello, Wander."
"Hiya… Flying fishy."
Ignoring the odd remark, Dracula turned to his three servants. "Bring Lord Hater and his pipsqueak to me, ladies. Finally, that buffoon will see me transform his most hated enemy!" He chuckled evilly as the desire for blood overcame him. Not a minute later did the brides arrive with Hater and Peepers in tow.
Peepers' eye widened at the sight of his two foes. "Wander? Sylvia?!" While Peepers was terrified, Hater was furious.
"Dracula… What are you doing with my enemy?" Suddenly, it occurred to Hater that Wander could be severely hurt. But, that didn't scare him as much as the realization that he might not want Wander hurt at all.
I mean… He tried to find the evilness in his concern. It's obvious I don't want an injured enemy, especially since this particular enemy has been particularly lacking in the enemy department… right?
His train of thought came to a halt when Dracula cupped Wander's chin.
"HOW DARE YOU TOUCH MY ENEMY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
Dracula's red eyes shined with barely contained amusement. "There's a fine line between love and hate, isn't there?" As if to prove a point, he kissed Wander's cheek. This only made Lord Hater growl even louder. "To answer your question, nothing. I'm just going to bite his neck and turn him into a creature of the night." His gaze suddenly darkened, and he revealed his pointy fangs. "And he will love me and only me FOREVER AND EVER!"
"You're disgusting!" Hater was now so livid he was speaking before thinking rationally. "Wander loves everyone! It's what he does!"
"What?" Peepers blinked at him.
"My most hated enemy shall remain how he is, an infuriating fool who loves everyone, not just some stupid, lanky dude who's obviously never had a decent tan in his life!" Without a warning, green bolts emitted from his entire body, shocking the brides who held him. "Anyway, he is mine!"
"Prove it," Dracula taunted, releasing Wander. "It's no use anyway. Only his love's pleas can free him from my enchantment, if he even has one to begin with." He and the brides surrounded Hater and Peepers, their fangs shining in the moonlight.
"Now that that's in your thick skull, do your worst, you bag of bones!"
Ten minutes later, Dracula received Hater's worst: many bolts, a variety of punches, and cussing that made a vampire bleed from the ears. Peepers managed to sneak off and free the rest of the watchdogs, and they all surrounded the brides. Then, Hater's troop shoved the four in a closet and threw away the key. (Why there was a closet in a medieval castle was a question for another day.)
After that brawl, Hater carried Wander outside, and Peepers and some watchdogs carried Sylvia outside, too. They laid the two, sleeping heroes on the grass.
"Sylvia, wake up!" He paused. "Sir..." Peepers couldn't even try shaking Sylvia; he knew it was hopeless. Hater, on the other hand, was not giving up on his enemy.
"Wander?" He shook the nomad's shoulders. "Wander." He lightly slapped his cheeks. "Wander! Wake up!" He was about to give Wander a harder smack, but Peepers stopped him.
"Sir! Remember what Dracula said! I guess we could try to wake Sylvia up and - "
Wander opened his eyes and yawned. "H-Hater?" Beside him, Sylvia stretched her limbs.
"P-Peepers?"
Both the lord and his commander blushed fervently before turning to each other. "Oh grop…" They muttered in unison. "He/She… You… I…"
Wander wiped the sleep out of his eyes and smiled at them all. "Are you all here for the slumber party, too? GREAT!" He looked around for more familiar faces. "Hey, where's Rad and his three sisters?"
Hater glared daggers at Wander. "Don't ever say that name again!"
Peepers nudged Hater with a playful glint in his eye. "Jealous, sir?" One split second later, Peepers met his doom in the form of an angry skeleton, chasing after him and threatening to fry his tiny body.
Perplexed, Wander turned to Sylvia. "What's with them?"
"Beats me. Hey, you still got those chocolates? This beats a movie at that creep's house."
"Yep!" Grinning ear to ear, Wander took out the delectable treats, and the two pals watched the chase under the currently visible stars.
The End
