Author Notes: Hey guys, this is written for my challenge 'just another lengthy love quote challenge'. I'm aiming to write one chapter for every quote i have in there. thats 117. This first chapter is a bit rushed because i wanted to get the story going and get some exposition out of the way. If you were expecting Lily/Scorpy to happen right away I"m sorry it's not. I usually jump right into things thats why i love one shots so well but since i decided to write an actual story this time i'm going to try to build up to it as best i can so bear with me. Scorpy is only mentioned in this chapter but i promise he'll be in the next one.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Characters from Harry Potter but I think JK Rowling with blessing me with her books to write about :)

"How the hell could he do this to me! Is he out of his bloody mind!"

The shrill cry of Lily Potter called the attention of almost all of the people in the small square she and her cousin Hugo were walking through at noon on a particularly cold day at the end of December. It was the Christmas Holidays during their fifth year at Hogwarts and one would think they would be back at the Burrow with their entire extended family celebrating the birth of Christ or whatever it was they were supposed to be celebrating. It didn't matter anymore, Lily didn't care. She was never going back there and Hugo had come to accept that.

He was currently in the process of procuring a small golden coin from his pocket and struggling to send a message on it. In lieu of muggle cell phones since their parents could not seem to grasp the concept of how such things worked his father had come up with the brilliant plan to bring back the gold coins he and his friends had used in their school days to help the family stay in touch. Bloody brilliant dad but seeing as Ron himself did not know how to correctly use the things neither did his son. Lily had been behaving herself and standing quietly next to him, sulking, until her outburst that was. Hugo dropped the coin in surprise and looked up to see several dozen sets of eyes peering out of dimly lit windows at him, not all of them friendly with concern…

Grabbing his cousins arm he started walking, dragging her along with him. Lily was showing all the signs of being a toddler who was throwing a temper tantrum. "Lily, you're being a bit immature aren't you? I mean his parents are pretty much family to our parents you had to know he'd be there." He was getting rather tired of this and he was getting rather cold and he wanted to go home. Now. But that wasn't about to happen.

When he stopped once they were safely out of the square and away from busy bodies who would want to know why they were out in the cold on Christmas Day he looked up and was met with the big green eyes that commanded the attention of everyone who looked at Lily. It bad always been through her eyes that he had been able to tell exactly what she was thinking on hundred percent of the time. When she was about to cry her eyes would get wide and then scrunch tight in quite succession as she fought to keep the tears in their ducts. When she was happy they would sparkle and reflect all of the light around them. But now they were full of anger and her eye brows were furrowed at him as though he had just claimed that he had legal evidence proving she had been adopted.

"What on earth are you talking about I knew he'd be there? You know full well I knew he'd be there! I knew he'd be there and I had hoped that he would come to his senses when he saw me and immediately beg me to take him back. But then I got here and he was already here with that…harlot!" She crossed her arms and pouted like a five year old and had anyone seen her at that moment in her white Christmas dress that was entirely unpractical for the weather outside on this day with her arms folded and apparently furious they would have thought she was having a fit.

For the past year and a half Lily had been dating one Lysander Scamander. He was a Ravenclaw and by far the most desirable boy in his year in Ravenclaw. She hadn't had any classes with him because she was Gryffindor and a year younger than him at that but she'd known him her whole life and they both had a particular love for herbology. Then again Lily had a love for every other subject as well as she just loved to learn but they had really bonded over herbology and spent a lot of time in the green houses together just talking and laughing. Everyone else had seen it coming before she had and when he asked her out for tea in Hogsmeade one weekend at the beginning of her fourth year she had been completely blindsighted.

It had been complete bliss from there on out. Their relationship hadn't been one of those sickening ones where they were inseparable or never had anything to talk about that didn't include their partner. They liked to spend time with their friends or in the library casually holding hands on the table while they read text for class or in the greenhouses where they would get told off for throwing dirt at each other and running around the tables and causing a ruckus. They were in love and Lily had never really known anything about relationships before and so she completely enveloped herself in it.

The summer had consisted of lazy days in Godrics Hollow, laying on the grass. Lily delighted in the way her long red hair mixed with his shaggy blonde head when they'd lean their heads together. She loved to talk to him because he was smart and funny and he made her feel special. Her cousins would come over often as their parents couldn't go, oh, five seconds without being around each other. Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione were a hoot and Lily would always do her hair in braided pigtails the way she liked them when Lysander would come to visit.

Sometimes his mother would come with him and spend the day talking her parents' ears off about Rolf's latest endeavor or the latest issue of the Quibbler she was working on. Rose had always thought Luna Lovegood was fascinating and funny and she could see a lot of Luna in Lysander especially the blonde hair and blue eyes. Lorcan had his own girlfriend who, believe it or not, had nothing to do with any of them. He was terribly embarrassed by the whole to do everyone made about how their parents had helped to save the wizarding world and all that and refused to take part in any family events or reunion outings or even pretend to be friendly.

That's why when Lorcan had begun speaking to her at the beginning of December during final exams Lily had known that something was up. During the fall term things had been a bit odd between her an Lysander, he'd always been off in his own little world but she had convinced herself it was because of the new harder classes he had to take now that he was at NEWT level. She always offered to help him study for all the extra courses he was taking but he said she was too much of a distraction which she had taken as a compliment. So she'd taken to studying alone in the library when she usually would have with Lysander as company. It was lonely business studying mundane lessons by yourself and so when Lorcan had appeared one night she had been happy for the company if not a bit surprised.

They began having odd study sessions in which Lorcan requested help in Herbology, which unlike his brother had never been his strong suit, or Potions or some other field Lily was more skilled at than him. Lorcan was already in NEWTs level courses as well but Lily had taken to education as easily as her name sake had and already knew a lot of the things he was studying by reading all of her brothers' text books. After a few nights of this Lorcan seemed to be improving greatly which pleased Lily. She was very happy to be making a connection with her boyfriend's twin, something she had been trying to do during their entire relationship. She was happy, that was, until Lorcan started telling her that she should be careful with Lysander.

After that Lily got so angry at Lorcan she refused to talk to him any longer and started doing her studying in the common room. The night before break began she went to see Lysander and told him what Lorcan had said expecting him to qualm the worries it had caused. Instead he told her that he didn't want to see her anymore, that things were just too weird with them being in different houses and different years and that he couldn't handle a relationship this year because of how busy he was. Lily was completely devastated and pent the entirety of Christmas holidays preparing to see him at the family gathering which she knew he would attend whether or not he wanted to because Luna never took no for an answer. She was sure that once he had gone awhile without her he would realize how much he missed her and needed her back and that he would be practically begging her to take him back when he saw her at the Burrow.

She'd worn her favorite Christmas dress. It was yellow and against her pale skin and with her red hair falling down over her shoulders it looked very lovely. It used to be her mothers and so it was a bit old fashioned but she loved it all the same and she was sure Lysander would appreciate it just as well. When she walked through the front door she was greeted with the familiar, homely scent of the house and the hub bub of the entire Weasley clan and all of their friends echoing through the house. And she was also greeted by Lorcan Scamander of all people.

What could have possibly possessed Lorcan Scamander to attend one of these functions which he loathed to the core of his being? She was so confused by his appearance that she momentarily forgot to be shocked by the fact that the Scamanders were there before her family which meant Lysander was already here. He looked quite uncomfortable while he tried to tell her something and lily couldn't quite grasp what he was triyng to say. "So er…usually I wouldn't come to these things but well… I just…it's just that I actually got to be rather fond of you as person when you helped me past Herbology and well… I just wanted to warn you before…"

But Lily hadn't heard the rest of that explanation because over his shoulder she had seen them. Coming down the steps from the upper levels of the house she had always felt so comfortable in was the boy she loved more than anything in the world and her favorite cousin. Rose Weasley was walking down the steps backwards, her brown hair up in a plain pony tail exposing her shoulders in an off the shoulder purple sweater that came down over the belt of her dark jeans. She was laughing and pulling someone after her. That someone just happened to be Lysander whose eyes were pasted to Rose's and had showed the flush on his cheeks that Lily knew from experience happened after he had been kissing someone.

It was like watching a tragedy. She was screaming on the inside and her insides were ripping out but she couldn't pull her eyes away from it. Stepping off the last step Rose spun herself under Lysander's arm in a cutesy dance move and he pulled her into his chest and kissed the tip of her nose as though they were the only people in the room. Lily felt her heart literally break in her chest and immediately had the sensation that she was going to vomit. Clutching at her stomach she suddenly felt a hand steadying her shoulder.

"Yeah" Lysander said, "I thought it might go something like that…." He tried to steer her to a sofa but all she would allow him to do was help her sit down on a stool near the door. She was still staring at Lysander and Rose who looked perfectly comfortable snogging near the stairs while their parents made a ruckus in the kitchen preparing a meal for them. It was as though everyone was used to this sort of behavior. "When mum told me he came to stay here last week and we'd retrieve him when we came I had a feeling something like this was happening…I'm really sorry Lily."

Lily's stomach flipped. So everyone had known. Everyone in her family had known this was happening and no one had told her. More still Lysander had hid it from her. Forget that, her cousin was snogging her ex boyfriend. Hardly ex boyfriend they had only broken up before coming home for the holidays they were practically still together. But she wouldn't cry, she wouldn't give Lysander the satisfaction of seeing her cry. What was he? Nothing special. Fat chance she believed that. But she just kept staring at them talking to each other in whispers and kissing each others face everywhere but their lips. Somewhere near her she heard Lorcan sigh. And stand up.

"Listen…I'm leaving. I only came to tell you but I don't think I'm being much help especially since you won't talk to me...Scorpius Malfoy is having a Christmas party because his parents are out of the country…if you need to get out of here, away from this" he gestured disgustedly at the rest of the house, "floo me and I"ll tell you how to get there". He waited a minute as though waiting for her to respond to him and then stepped to the side and without saying good bye to his family or anything walked out of the door.

Lily had sat there for several more minutes just staring at the place she'd seen them emerge from. Without seeming to notice her they had moved to the garden and she could no longer see them but she just kept staring unsure of what to do. Hugo had found her after awhile. "Lils, what's wrong? Lils?" He's shaken her and she hadn't responded and he'd crouched down next to her. At that moment Lysander and Rose had emerged from the back yard yet again, Lysander's cheeks even redder than they had been and Lily flinched. Hugo looked over his shoulder and saw what she was staring at and looked back at her guiltily. "Oh…that…"

Lily had suddenly let out a frustrated scream alerting the entire first floor of her presence including the disgusting couple who had both turned the shade of a red she hadn't thought possible. Hugo had grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the house intending only to take her outside and calm her down. Lily had other ideas, she started off towards the little town nearby, walking so fast that he had to jog at times to keep up. She was never, never returning to that house again.

And now here they were, several miles from the Burrow, freezing their buns off and Hugo was quickly tiring of it. "Lily. We have to go back. It's almost time for dinner…Mum made gram's sugar free cherry pie..." Something in Hugo's voice said that he knew that his attempt was in vain, not to mention that sugar free cherry pie wasn't exactly appealing….but Lily ignored him.

"Oh I'm not going back Hugo…you go back. You go back there and tell them…tell HER that…that I disown her…That I disown ALL of them! Any family that would keep this from me… I don't want them. I don't." And she turned away form him again because he too had lied to her, he should have told her. He should have been the one to tell her not Lorcan…Lorcan… "Besides. I have plans. I'm going to Malfoy's party."

Hugo had been kicking at a patch of ice on the path, avoiding looking at her, but when he heard what she said he looked up and his eyes bugged out. "As in Scorpius Malfoy? The Scorpius Malfoy who pulled Rose's hair whil she was being sorted and pushed my face into the dirt when we were second years? Why on earth would you go to his party? On Christmas no less!" Lily liked that this idea seemed to upset Hugo so much. He should be upset, because she was upset with him and she hated him. They'd been best friends since they were in diapers but she hated him right now. He should have told her…

"Yes, Scorpius Malfy. And if I remember correctly when he put your face in the dirt you had kicked him in the shin you little twat. And I'm going because Lorcan invited me and I'm beginning to think he has the right idea about our families…Their better appreciated from afar." And with that she turned on her heal and walked back to town leaving Hugo in the dust. Turning around right before she left hearing distance she yelled back to him. "Tell my dad I'm with Lorcan okay? DON"T TELL HIM WHOSE HOUSE I'M AT!" She emphasized the last part. "Don't tell your dad either!" She knew that if her dad or uncle heard she was at Malfoy Manor they would show up with wands in hand and she couldn't have that. She was planning on going to this party and forgetting all about her stupid family who didn't love her at all. She was planning on getting into all kinds of trouble and making all kinds of new friends because obviously she had been doing things all wrong for the last fifteen years of her life.

Within an hour Lily had dirtied up the front of her dress a bit kneeling on the floor of a dingy pub and flooing Lorcan at Malfoy's. However surprised to hear from her Lorcan had followed through in that he had given her exact instructions on how to floo to the Manor. Immediately upon arrival she had been blasted by a onslaught of music and smoke and heat that she hadn't thought possible on a day like today. Lorcan had put his arm around her in a protective way and guided her through the crowded den and right to the bar which was set up in the kitchen of Scorpius' house. She hadn't known what to ask for so she just told him to make her something strong and by Merlin he had followed through.

After two glasses of what Lorcan referred to as a Firewhisky Meltdown and a shot of a muggle drink called Aftershock some seventh year bloke had nicked from his father's liquor cabinet, Lily was enjoyably sloshed. She found herself sitting on a sofa in a dimly lit room with a grand piano in one corner leaning in the crook of Lorcan's arm. She was getting very sleepy with the heat which was only intensified because someone had lit the fireplace next to the sofa and her eyes kept drooping shut only to be nudged by Lorcan who was trying to make sure she didn't pass out too early. After once such occurance Lily opened her eyes to look at him.

He looked very much like Lysander, which was not surprising since they were identical twins. He had the same blonde hair although his was shorter and curlier not wavy like his brothers. Lily drunkenly reached up and twisted a bit of it around her finger. Entranced by the movement her fingers executed to do this she was in a daze. But then a thought occurred to her. "Lorcan why isn't your girlfriend at this party with you?" Come to think of it she hadn't seen Lorcan's girlfriend Darcy in quite some time… had she even seen her at all since term began?

"Darcy graduated last year. She's off in the America's studying Zoology or something at a Muggle university…merlin knows why…thinks we should take some time off." Lorcan's answer was emotionless and to the point which was just as Lily had always known to take him. Lily realized after a moment that he was looking at her hair and she could feel him running his hands through it a bit. He looked just as lost as she felt and it made her even sadder than she already was.

"Do you miss her terribly?" It was a silly thing to ask and Lily was sure she would not have said it were she not intoxicated but she genuinely wanted to know. It was interesting to her how Lorcan had invited her to this party with him and come to the Burrow expressly to be there for her when she found out about Lysander and Rose and she was beginning to feel very close to him.

"Yes." Again his answer was cold but she could tell he meant it and that admitting it caused him great pain. He stopped playing with her hair and looked at her. There was something in those blue eyes that reminded her so much of his brother but at the same time she knew he was completely different. He would have married Darcy, she thought. He never would have left her for her cousin, or any relative for that matter. And she realized he was here for the exact same reason she was, to drink her feelings and try to start fresh again.

Something came over Lily and she pushed her head forward what seemed to her like a mile that separated them and kissed Lorcan very softly on the lips. She pulled back and looked at him expecting him to look very surprised the way Lysander had the first time she had kissed him in the greenhouse. But Lorcan looked cool, almost as though he had been expecting it. he started running his hand through her hair for a moment again and looked as though he was considering it, as though the kiss had not happened. But then he tilted his chin down and kissed her, pressing his lips against hers softly at first and then probing her lips open with his tongue and using it to investigate the crevices of her mouth and brush over her teeth.

Maybe it was just that she was drunk or that she had missed being close to someone or that he looked so much like his brother but Lily found herself thinking that this may be the best kiss she had ever experienced. It sent tingles through her skin and made her feel alive. After a few moments of kissing like that, he pulled back and closed his eyes as though sleeping, leaning his forehead against hers and pulling her closer to him. Lily's mind flickered to the image of Lysander pulling Rose into him earlier that evening but luckily she didn't have much time to dwell.

At that exact moment a drunken Slytherin sixth year who Lily thought as name Kyle stumbled into the room brandishing a whiskey bottle as though it were a weapon. He took one look at them and said, "Oi, Scamander, another wench eh? Does this one have another boyfriend too?" Without opening his eyes Lysander took a deep ragged breath that made Lily wonder if he was about to cry, but he did not. He just stayed put. She looked at the boy who seemed to be waiting for a response and wondered about what he had said.

Suddenly it made sense. Darcy had found someone else. She might be in the Americas but seeing as her family had been Death Eater supporters she very much doubted that she was studying at a Muggle university….Reaching down and grasping one of Lysanders hand she gave it a squeeze and looked at the boy. "I had a boyfriend but…" She didn't quite know what to say… she didn't full well want to tell people her ex boyfriend was off shagging her cousin, that just wouldn't do…. She looked up and on the wall there was a picture of a lake with a single sail boat on it. On a shore in the distance you could see someone waving. She imagined she was on the shore waving and Lysander was on the boat, sailing away from her. She smiled and squeezed Lorcan's hand again. "He…sailed away" And with that she settled down on Lorcan's shoulder and closed her eyes again. Maybe now he'd let her go to sleep.