. . . . . .

The warm water surrounding me, allowing me to slowly slip away. What is this strange strange light? It's beckoning me to come forward. I have been told not to listen, but this feeling is too overwhelming. Speak. Speak to me light, tell me that everything will be better on the other side. So close, so close to the light.

What? What is this? Why is it getting farther away, light! Come back to me! Tell me it's okay! This noise, it's too loud now. Go away. Please, just go.

I slowly lifted my head from the water, the door. Someones knocking on the door. I drag my body out of the water and wrap a towel around my waist. The door slowly opens.

"Feliciano? A-Are you okay?" It's Miss Hungary. I wonder how long I've been in here.

I plaster on a fake smile, "Oh hello Hungary! Did you need me for something?" this is how it is lately, fake a smile for everyone. I'm happy. I'm perfectly happy. No one understands that everything I do is an act.

"No no, I just wanted to know where you were, I made some tea if you would like some."

"Oh sure, I'll be out in a moment." I close the door, and when she's out of earshot, I lock it. My eyes wander to the mirror. Ugly. Disgusting. Horrid. Me. The medicine cabinet. My razor. My release. My sweet sweet release.

The beautiful silver color on this metal. Simply stunning. I wish I was as beautiful as this. I bring the razor to my lips for a quick peck before I press it to my thigh. A quick tear rolls down my cheek as I bite my lip in an attempt to keep quiet. I press harder and drag. Harder and harder. The more the blood drips down. The more pain I feel. The better I want to feel.

This time, I let the tears fall. This time, I want someone to find me. Maybe this time, someone will save me.

. . . . . .