Title: Understand the Silence
Author: castiel-thepizzaman
Pairing: eventual Dean/Castiel
Rating: NC-17 or M, PG this chapter.
Warning: I do not own Supernatural. There is some swearing and mentions of abuse in this chapter.

A/N: So I seem to love just making up silly little plots in my head. But suggestions of where this story should go are always interesting. This will not be an instalove fic. It's actually going to go through Castiel's and Dean's friendship pretty thoroughly first, before they get together. So it's going to be a pretty long story! I apologize if that isn't what you want. Yeah, I know, sucky summary.

But actually, what I want is a relaxed fic... so this may not be up to my normal writing standards, and I apologize for that. But I want something I can enjoy writing while not feeling pressured to make it into the best thing I've ever written. Plus, I wrote this out during a 11-7 shift I covered for my friend, not a person stirred and I was all alone. So writing time.

Also, to cover my ass. This story does not reflect or reveal any information from the residents I work with. All of them are purely figments of my imagination.

I promise I'll get back to my other stories, especially the ones I post regularly. They've been making me jump around shifts and I've been too tired/busy to proof read.

Enjoy reading! Feel free to comment on anything that's good, bad, or whatever in-between. If you have suggestions for things you want to see happen I would love to know!

Understand the Silence
Chapter One

"It's my wedding today." A sweet voice called out to the man sitting at the curved nurses desk. "Castiel, are you coming to my wedding?"

Castiel glanced up, his blue eyes meeting the faded gray ones and he let out a small smile before he reached up to push his dark hair off his forehead and out of his eyes. "Your wedding, Laura?" His deep voice seemed to echo around the small area.

Laura smiled, her hands moving away from her walker to smooth her light purple, long sleeved shirt. "Yes, see!" She pulled up her dark slacks, showing the white T.E.D. socks she wore that helped with circulation. "I'm even wearing white socks for my wedding day." She let the ankle of her pants fall down before she beamed at the man sitting behind the desk.

"I see that." Castiel said, returning her smile. He placed his pen back onto the folder he was filling out. "I'll be sure to attend your wedding." By now, Castiel was used to Laura's antics, attempting to bring her out of her fantasy and keep her grounded in reality was something he had stopped doing a few years ago. Something would set her off and in her dementia she would believe that it was the day she was getting married. It usually started when Castiel would wake her in the morning and ask her some simple questions. When Laura couldn't answer one she would claim that her mother would know the answer. Despair would wash over the man since Laura was nearing her ninetieth birthday in a few months and her mother had passed away years ago.

Laura chuckled, placing her hands back on her walker. "Good, and I want to see you sitting up front since you're my favorite." She smiled and winked at him before slowly moving towards the activities room.

Castiel kept his smile on his face, slightly taken aback at the wink she had thrown in his direction. Just this morning she was yelling at him, telling him he couldn't treat her like a child on her wedding day even though all he wanted to do was give her a partial bed bath. No one ever said working in a nursing home would be easy, especially for Castiel. He had some co-workers who breezed easily through their daily routines and schedules, barely batting an eyelash, but not many of them voluntarily worked in the hospice ward, taking care of people and easing their passing into death. Castiel sighed, rubbing his hand over his eyes and knew that he needed to check up on Arthur. Right now, his family was with him, but Arthur probably needed his bedpan changed so Castiel hoped that he could do that once he finished his intake paper for one of his residents. All together, including Arthur and May, who resided in the hospice ward, he had nine residents, being just one below the maximum count. Each resident had their own personal nurse and the same C.N.A. would come in and take care of them each day.

As Castiel was counting up the total water that Ruth had taken in during lunch he was mentally running through the list that he needed to do before the end of the shift he heard some footsteps approaching his bowed head, scribbling down his initials on the lined paper.

"You getting ready for your wedding?" A sweet voice drawled across the counter of the nurses station. Castiel just scoffed, initialing that all the alarms were working for his residents. "I thought Ms. Laura was going to ask you to be her husband."

Castiel closed the binder and slid it into the slot next to the Wing One binder and shook his head, his cerulean eyes meeting his boss. "That would be slightly difficult since she is already married, her husband is coming to visit her after he gets off of work at two."

Pamela leaned against the counter and shook her head letting a small smile spread across her lips and joy dancing behind her eyes. "Why do you have to take the fun out of everything, Castiel?"

"Because you don't pay me to do that." He stood, noticing Abigail hovering three feet to the right of Pamela, an uncomfortable look on her face. He assumed she needed help moving a patient or something along that nature and Castiel turned back to his employer, about to excuse himself when he noticed the look on her face. "Oh no... I know that look. Please stop giving me that look." Pamela shrugged and her smirk got wider as she handed a folder over to Castiel. He hesitated, holding his hands back before he sighed and grasped it as if it would explode. "I'm at the maximum limit, you know." Castiel growled, quickly glancing at the name before he looked at his boss again.

"I know, and I apologize for this, but you know, he's a guy, you're a guy." She shrugged but at Castiel's glare she back tracked and told the truth. "Okay, not really, but I hear he's a bitch so I figured you'd put him straight."

"Pamela." Castiel hissed at her language, glancing around at the residents who were sitting lazily around the area, rocking in their wheelchairs while watching Daytime television on the large screen or napping. "You owe me for this."

Pamela leaned across the counter and placed a light kiss on Castiel's lips. "Of course I do, sweetie. Thank you." Then she pulled back and turned away from the stunned man, walking down the hallway to her office.

Once the woman was gone, Castiel reached up to wipe the traces of the woman's lipstick off his lips. He never took her advances seriously, Pamela was a flirty woman as it was and Castiel just happened to be a male within her presence. He was one of the few males who worked here, nursing, especially in a nursing home, was not particularly favored by the male population. Castiel did it because he was good at it and it was what he loved doing.

As soon as Castiel was sure the red lipstick was off his face he turned to Abigail who was smiling at him. She opened her mouth to say something before Castiel held up his hand to signal her to stop. Instantly, she shut her mouth, a little too forcefully and quickly for his liking. "Don't you dare say a word!" Castiel joked, a smile on his face to dissuade any grievances he had about Abigail's actions. "You need help?"

A smile returned to her face and Castiel sighed inwardly. "Yeah, Macmeller's slipped down her bed, feel like using your manly muscles to help me get her right?"

Castiel nodded, following the tail end of Abigail's maroon scrubs, wondering if they were the same ones she wore two weeks ago when he had forcibly entered her home and tackled her boyfriend to the ground. It was obvious, at least to him, that Abigail was being abused. He had not witnessed it first hand until he was getting into his car in the parking lot and Abigail was standing on the sidewalk waiting for her ride. It was over an hour since her shift hand ended and Castiel was only still there because of his hospice duty and he was about to offer her a ride when a blue Jeep Liberty drove up and stopped in front of her. A fearful smile appeared on her face as she greeted the man in the car, but he just roughly grabbed her and pulled her into the vehicle, an angry look flashing across his face. Castiel was entranced as he saw words form on her lips and fear fill her eyes. It wasn't enough for her boyfriend and he reached across and slapped her, hard, across the face, leaving her crumpled in the seat. As he took off, Abigail sat up and looked out the window, her eyes meeting Castiel's with shame.

The two stepped inside the room and Castiel glanced over at Abigail as she shrugged and headed towards Ms. Macmeller's bed. When Abigail said the woman had moved down the bed, Castiel wasn't thinking that she was so far down that her knees were bent and her thighs were almost touching the base board.

"You want to take the lead?" Castiel asked as he placed a bed protector on one side of Mrs. Macmeller while Abigail lowered the bed to knee height.

"Sure." Abigail grunted and Castiel felt a flutter of pride that the nervous CNA who showed up a few month previous and nearly ran out of a residents room crying when a bought of Alzheimer made them irrational and mean had turned into this confident and knowledgable woman. "Hope." Abigail placed an hand on the woman's arm and calling her by her first name. "This is Castiel, he's going to help me get you positioned right in the bed. Is that okay?"

The woman's brown eyes glanced owlishly up at Castiel and he gave her a reassuring smile. "Sure." The woman nodded, giving them her consent.

They both became busy rolling the drawsheet up to the woman's body, grabbing the sheet at the shoulder and waist area with their palms up. Then, they placed the knee closest to the headboard on the bed protector."Will you cross your arms for me, Hope, and tuck your chin?" The woman complied, a small smile on her face as she kept her eyes glued to Castiel. He glanced up at the woman across from him, but Abigail just shrugged. "We're going to do a rocking movement and move you on three, ready? One... Two... Three." In an easy fluid movement, they had moved Hope up to her pillows and set her down gently.

Abigail and Castiel began to tuck their drawsheet in, Abigail chanting the movements silently. That was one thing she still did from her training and Castiel appreciated it, brining him back to the time he was in nursing school.

"Alright, Hope, enjoy your nap!" Abigail's cheery voice called out, breaking Castiel from his thoughts about college. Even though he had fun during it, returning home with many stories that his parent's wouldn't approve of, it still wasn't a time he ever wanted to repeat. Hence, why he was still an Registered Nurse and had given up any thoughts pf pursuing his Master's degree.

Castiel was the first one to leave the room, standing in the hallway as Abigail turned off the light and moved the privacy curtain. Once she exited the room she sighed and pushed a stray strand of auburn hair behind her ear.

"Coffee?" He asked, glancing at his watch and seeing that their breaks were nearing. He attempted to change around the schedules without Pamela knowing, and if she did, not often did she complain about it. He tried to keep the workers that disliked each other, or didn't work well together separate. Since he thought that Abigail and him worked well together he would often coordinate so their breaks and lunches were the same time.

"Thought you'd never ask." Abigail asked, reaching into the front pocket of her scrubs to grab some hand sanitizer. She squeezed a healthy dose into her hand and offered it to Castiel who accepted it gratefully.

"I forgot mine at home, I feel so lost without it." Castiel admitted as he rubbed the gel in between his hands and fingers and headed towards the break room making sure Abigail was following.

"I know how you feel." She replied, a small smile on her face that turned instantly into sheer panic.

Castiel noted the change and glanced around only to see his friend lifted up by the corner of his eyes.

"Abby!" A female voice cooed and Castiel instantly recognized it as Anna's voice. Abigail noted it too and her posture relaxed as she was placed back on the ground. "I thought I wasn't going to get to see you, but I was called in early due to the influx of residents." The red head appeared from behind Abigail and smiled at Castiel. "Hey you, I called your home. I didn't know you were working this shift."

"I was called in, but I work the night shift as well today." Both of the women wrinkled their noses, knowing that Castiel got off at three and then would be back at eleven that night.

Anna followed them to the break room since her shift technically did not start for another fifteen minutes. "Guess you're going to need that coffee then." Anna piqued up as she watched the two throw themselves into the blue plastic hairs that surrounded a white, sanitary table. She poured two cups of coffee and put some cream in sugar in one and passed it to Castiel. "Abby, what do you like in your coffee?"

Abigail looked up gratefully, "Just cream, please."

After a few seconds of toying around, Anna came back to the table and set the coffee in front of Jess and held one in her own hands. The three of them sat there in silence, being the only ones in the break room. Working the early morning to mid-afternoon shift was the worst of them all. They all had to get their patients ready in an hour for breakfast. Castiel had barely gotten Ruth, the last patent he woke that day, to breakfast on time. Now that lunch had passed, they were awaiting most of their residents to wake up from their nap after their meal.

Suddenly remembering Arthur's bedpan, Castiel pulled out his phone and unlocked it, scrolling through his contacts before he found Ruby's name, opening a new message to her and typing out his request. Not many people would go willingly into the hospice ward, death being an uncomfortable and awkward thing to most. But Castiel knew he could always count on Ruby to accompany him into the ward. Something in his life told him that she was not unaccustomed to death. A few seconds later he got a reply from the woman, claiming she would do it, but he owed her something in return. With her, she wouldn't give something with out getting something in return and Castiel knew he would be bartering with her later. She seemed nice, probably was nice in reality, but he had never gained any desire to get to know the woman. They were just different and he couldn't see any way around their problems.

Castiel placed this cellphone back in his light blue scrubs before he turned back to Anna and Abigail who were chatting quietly between each other. "What are you guys talking about?" Castiel asked, bringing the coffee to his lips to take a sip. Anna had made it just the way he liked it and was thankful for that.

Abigail smirked at him. "Oh you know, girlish stuff that you would have no interest in."

"Is it a sleepover? I would totally be interested in a sleepover." Castiel commented before he realized how sexually that could be taken. Thankfully the two women knew Castiel well enough to know he did not mean it in in such a lewd way.

"Castiel, I sleep over at your house all the time." Anna laughed, rolling her eyes. "You've never been interested in having a girlish sleepover."

Castiel shook his head, setting the cup down on the table. "Since you're my sister it's different. I've been living with you my whole life. Now, even when I'm twenty-six, I can't seem to get rid of you."

"Fine. How about this? Abigail comes over, maybe some other girls from work. Not Chuck or Adam." Confusion crossed Castiel's face and Anna noticed it. "A girlish sleepover meaning only girls and for some reason you." Anna continued as if their wasn't any interruption. "We'll bake cookies, have pillow fights, talk about boys, watch movies, do our make-up, and paint our nails."

A deep laugh came from Castiel's lips and he shook his head. "That doesn't sound like something that would interest me."

The three of them laughed but after some convincing, Castiel agreed to the plan and they began to drift to other topics. As Abigail threw her cup away in the trash, the sleeves of her shirt underneath her maroon scrub top raised and Castiel could see the fading bruise around her wrist and a tremor of anger ran through his body.

A light knock on the break room door brought him out of his revive, Jessica poked her head in, her mess of curls pulled into a ponytail and slung over her shoulder. "Castiel, your new resident is in. I didn't know if you wanted to greet him once he got here."

Castiel sighed, chugging the last of his coffee before he nodded at Jessica. "Sure, Jess, I'll be right there. Thanks." The blonde haired woman smiled back before she disappeared, shutting the door behind her. "Alright. I've got to meet my new resident, who I've heard is a hard-ass."

They all bid their goodbyes and Castiel pulled on the hem of his light blue scrubs, fixing it so it was straight as he headed down the hallways. He finally glanced through the folder he was carrying around with him and flipped through the files. Robert Steven Singer. Knee injury from an accident in his junk yard. Junk yard. Castiel raised an eyebrow at that. Spending about two weeks in this facility for physical therapy and care. This should be a joy.

Glancing at the room number the man was going to be moved into, Castiel closed the folder and placed it in a tray on the nurses station desk before heading down a hallway into the physical care section. Once he stopped outside of 114 Castiel knocked and entered to room since the door was already opened.

Five pairs of eyes stared at him as he tried to force a smile on his face to greet them with.