Scream!

Even though I was determined that Grade 10 was going to be my best year yet, it was beginning to look like that was not going to happen. Firstly, my two best friends, or should I say my only two friends, were not in any of my classes and secondly, last night my parents had sat me down for the talk. The one that starts with them telling you how much they both love you and ends with them telling you they are getting divorced but it has nothing to do with you.

I should not have been surprised at this latest development. After all, all my parents ever did was yell at each other but still how could they both sit there smiling when they were destroying my life. I am an only child so its not like I could share this horribly unhappy moment with anyone. Then just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, they started going over the living arrangements. It was obvious that even though they never agreed on anything else, when it came to giving me away for a week at a time, they had no trouble. I couldn't stand another minute of this and stormed out of the room slamming my bedroom door in response to their calls.

The next morning I took special care with my appearance. I didn't want to go to school with a neon sign announcing the disaster that my home life had became. I considered my appearance to be punk/scene/goth. I have naturally black hair that I darken even more in which I have red highlights. I love to outline my blue eyes with thick black eyeliner. To my delight my parents seen endlessly distressed by my looks. I don't care what they think especially after last night. Wouldn't they be surprised to learn the details of the real me. The girl who sits in her bedroom marking small cuts on her arms, the girl who keeps a baggie in between her mattresses so that a joint was always available whenever I needed it. Most especially when I need to escape this boring bedroom and the world outside my door.

I always meet my best friends, Angel and Darcy at the bus stop. When I rounded the corner Angel was standing away from all the other passengers. Angel's hair was as light as mine was dark. She was a natural blonde who highlighted her hair with black streaks. Like me, she had numerous piercings, a little diamond in her nose, a Monroe just below her lip and five ear piercings. We had both just got industrial piercings on the top of our ears. Our identical make-up style made us look like twins.

As Angel turned towards me, to my embarrassment, tears began to fall. I had been unable to call Angel last night because my cell phone was in the kitchen and after my grand exit to my bedroom I refused to come out. My lap top was also in the living room so all contact with the world was cut off. Angel, who had been my BFF since Grade 5 came rushing toward me. Just then Darcy, our gay guy BFF, came running down the street. As usual, he arrived just as the bus pulled up. Darcy's lateness was caused by his lengthy morning routine. His black hair was always perfectly styled. Piercings also dominated his face with one in each corner of his mouth and a third one in the middle of his nose between the two nostrils. We had to rush to get onto the bus.

The three of us headed down the aisle toward our favorite seats in the back of the bus, keeping our heads down and ignoring the other people on the bus. Just before reaching our seats, I noticed a group of five guys. I had seen them around school. They were considered to be the punk emo group. I had heard that they were a really talented band but I had never heard them play. I think they were in Grade 11 or 12 so definitely way out of my range, not that I cared. My general dark appearance put off most people and my life's recent happenings added to my signals of "Stay Away".

The bus started moving before I reached my seat and I flew forward. As I put out a hand to steady myself I caught the arm of one of the punkers. As I muttered "Oh Shit" , the most gorgeous pair of blue eyes looked at me and assured me that it was OK. I couldn't believe that my heart was betraying me and skipped a beat as I quickly sat down with my friends. I glared at them daring them to say anything. The conversation quickly turned to my parent's betrayal.

School passed in the usual hazy blur that I preferred to spend my days in. At the beginning of each semester my new teachers would do their best to try and draw me out but after six or so weeks most of them would give up. Thankfully it was had passed the six week point as I was not in the mood to deal with a do-gooder today.

However, I did notice the posters all over the school announcing the dance tonight featuring a band called the "Black Veil Brides" and mostly I noticed the face of the lead singer, featuring the blue eyes from the bus.

I couldn't believe that it was me suggesting to Darcy and Angel that we attend the dance, the most anti-social person in our school! What was happening? Was it the fact that I didn't want to be at home alone with my Mother or was it for some other reason?

As we entered the gym that night, the punk sounds of the Black Veil Brides rattled the bleachers. Obviously I wasn't the only female to notice the lead singer. Most of the female school population was pressed close to the stage. Again, someone or something took over my brain and I heard myself convincing my friends to follow me to the front for a closer look. We pushed through the crowd, made easier by the fact that a lot of people were scared of us as they were never sure what we were thinking.

The band was playing a song called "Perfect Weapon". Suddenly my eyes locked with the lead singer's, whose name I had since learned was Andy Six. Andy wore dark black make-up, even darker than mine! He was dressed totally in black with a bullet belt and leather gloves. The band had black paint smeared over their arms and chests. Then to my surprise Andy winked at me. I was sure that I had imagined this.

A couple of songs later, the band took a break. As Andy was leaving the stage he called out to me "Hey, Girl from the bus". Then again to my utter surprise Andy asked if I would like to hook up for coffee after the dance. I stuttered out a mumble "Yes".

And as they say the rest is history. My life which seemed so dismal suddenly didn't look so bad. Screaming and tears were no longer needed. Over the next month, Andy encouraged me to talk to my Mom and Dad. He also took me a school counselor to help with my cutting problem. Andy showed me that drugs were just causing more problems than they helped.

It's now been three months. Andy and I are celebrating are month anniversary and I haven't cut or smoked a joint since October. Life is great! This proves that life can really change no matter how bad you think your life is and that you have the power to change it.