Complexity Kills By Ardin
Disclaimer: I own the DVDs (Season Three on April 24th!!! Bwa-ha-ha), but I don't own anything else that is NCIS related except for the ideas.
Spoilers: Everything up to and including Twilight is completely fair game.
A/N: I originally posted the prologue as an NC-17 on the NCIS ezboard. This is an all-age friendly version and will be followed by the sequel that I promised everyone who read on the board. It is set immediately after the events of Twilight, but it is an AU where kate doesn't die, which should be pretty obvious through the reading.
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Prologue: Simple Reality
His boat did not provide its usual mental distraction as his mind ran through the events of the day. Growling slightly, he put more force into each stroke, sanding the wood before him to a smooth finish. He hated that Fornell had been the one responsible for saving all of their asses up on that roof. He hated that he hadn't been the one to think of putting snipers on the adjoining rooftops; snipers that had seen Ari before the terrorist could fire a shot at his team. And he hated that he hadn't been the one to shoot the bastard.
His mind played through hundreds of alternate realities for the afternoon: Ari shooting him; Ari shooting Tony or one of the others. It was bad enough that Kate had taken those rounds to her vest; he didn't even want to think of what he would do if she had… With a forceful shake of his head he pushed away the image of Kate on a slab in the morgue.
Stepping away from the framework in front of him, he took a large sip from the coffee mug on his workbench. The air in his basement was thick and muggy, the result of a brutal combination of unseasonably hot weather and the oppressive 'what ifs' that raced through his mind. He had stripped out of his shirt hours ago, preferring to allow the sweat to run down his bare back rather than letting it collect in the sticky fabric of the garment.
Taking another swallow of the bitter liquid before setting the cup down, he turned back to the wood frame and sander. He had only been at it for a few more minutes when her footsteps on the stairs drew him once again out of his mental wanderings. Her pace was slow, but purposeful and he chose to continue his work, acknowledging her presence only with the slight straightening of his back, preferring to let her speak first about whatever had drawn her to his home so late at night.
He followed her progress towards him by the sound of her footsteps, wholly expecting her to speak at any moment. Words that would make apologies, or inquire after his state of mind, or ask for reassurance that they had done right without actually voicing the request. But the words never came. Instead she stopped behind him, the loud silence drowning out his ability to exactly pinpoint her location.
He was just about to give in - to turn and start the conversation himself - when he felt her hand trail lightly, almost reverently down his naked back. He stiffened at the touch, only just managing to hold back his gasp of surprise. Her fingers tracked fleetingly across his right shoulder to his spine, where they applied more pressure to trace the slight bumps of his vertebrae. Holding completely still, partially in shock but mostly out of curiosity, he closed his eyes as she laid her palm solid just above the waistband of his pants, pausing her motion for the barest of moments. Continuing on she moved her hand to the left, stopping only when she was lightly gripping his side, her thumb running up and down the length of the small scar she found just below his lowest rib.
He opened his eyes as the reality of their situation came flooding back to him. Their ranks, positions, and the trauma of the day quelling his desire to see just where the hell she was planning on taking all of this. He tried to rationalize her behavior, his mind coming up with dozens of idiotic explanations that would allow them both to stay inside their professional walls. He was just about to ask her what was going on when he felt her thumb pull away from its motion over his puckered wound, only to have it replaced by the feel of her lips closing on the skin in a wet kiss. Sucking in a deep breath, he turned sharply toward her, clamping down on the arousal that her brief touch had ignited.
Her features showed no sign of embarrassment or insanity, as she locked her eyes on his for a short second. They were dark with intensity and desire, and they held his blue gaze for only a moment before moving downward to take in his bare chest and abdomen. Hands that had fallen to her side when he turned moved back to his body, one gripping his waist again as the other skated briefly over his pecs. Resisting the urge to touch her, he cleared his throat before speaking.
"Kate, stop." His voice was soft, almost caring. His mind had managed during the brief moments of their contact to connect her actions with the events of the day: their close brush with death, the end of the tension that had settled over NCIS since that day in the morgue over a year ago. As much as he wanted exactly what she was offering him, he also wanted her to be thinking clearly about it. He repeated his request. "Stop."
His words seemed to barely register as she closed most of the remaining distance between them, leaning in to kiss his shoulder, sucking lightly at the scar Ari had left during their original encounter. He closed his eyes briefly as all the heat that had been present in the air seemed to shift to center on her presence. He tried again to stop her, voice a little louder and harsher. "Kate, stop."
His tone was slightly husky as her ministrations continued to eat away at his resolve, his arousal starting to make itself known despite his efforts at self-control. His words appeared to make it to her this time, as she shook her head lightly in response and moved her mouth across his chest to his left bicep and the grenade shrapnel mark from Columbia. He could feel his resolve slipping away, and he tried again, this time moving his hands to her hips and holding her forcefully away from him as he spoke.
"Kate, stop this. Tomorrow, you're going to wake up and seriously regret coming here… doing this. You should go home." He held her gaze as he spoke, silently promising to never speak of it again if she just left. He didn't expect her to react vocally, and her clear, confident tone surprised him.
"Even if I regret this…" She paused and he clearly understood her unspoken completion of the phrase 'and I won't.' "…I would rather regret doing this, than someday regret never having the chance to do this." Memories of earlier in the day flashed again through his head. Her body crashing to the ground, two rounds stuck in the vest. His fleeting anguish that she might be dead. And the sound of a rifle shot that could just as easily have been Ari as the FBI agent who had actually pulled the trigger.
His resolve continued to degrade, as he internally acknowledged that if anything ever did actually happen to one of them, he would regret never telling her how he felt. And it crumbled further as her voice once again sounded in the silent basement. "I want you, and have for a long time." His hands tightened involuntarily on her hips, pulling her slightly closer. "If you don't want me, than I'll leave, but…" She left the words hanging and the last of his defenses crumbled in the silence that followed.
Leaning toward her, he touched his lips lightly to her own; his hands sliding around to her back, pulling her closer. All hesitation that he felt was blown from his mind at her moan as his large palm slipped under her shirt hem. Kissing her soundly, head tilting to an optimum angle, tongue tracing her bottom lip, he turned them, pressing her back against the wooden frame of his boat. She squirmed against him, trying desperately to increase their already total body contact and opened her mouth willingly to his questing tongue. His hands stayed steady on her back, rubbing small circles under her shirt as hers found purchase on his neck and in his hair. Their mouths made love, tongues wrapping erotically around each other, thrusting forcefully past teeth and gums. Her mixed taste of vanilla and coffee dueled with his bourbon, both quickly losing themselves in the other.
Pulling her away from the boat and turning her, he led her out of the basement, his hands on her waist the entire trip. As they came out of the basement, he turned her once again to face him, catching her lips with his as he pushed her gently down the hall to his bedroom.
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The alarm clock woke him the next morning. Growling at the insistent beeping he reached to the nightstand to turn it off, taking in the empty bed as he did so. He hadn't actually expected her to stay with him. He had known even as he kissed her lips that first time downstairs that she wouldn't. Had known as he settled himself over her on his bed, as he made love to her in complete silence.
A part of him still wished that she had remained with him, been curled up next to him when the alarm went off. Ironically it was the same part of him that had known last night that what they were doing was insane and potentially disastrous. Now all he wanted was to have her cuddled up beside him, to make love to her again, to talk about what it all meant.
Heaving a heavy sigh, he threw the covers off and slid to sit on the edge of the bed. Resting his palms on his bare knees he rubbed his hands roughly over his face, trying hopelessly to banish the images of Kate which kept making their way to the forefront of his mind. Standing quickly, he ignored the desire to call in sick for the first time in his life and made his way instead to the bathroom for a shower.
It was going to be a very long day at work, and as the hot water coursed down his body, a myriad of different scenarios for seeing Kate during the day flashed through his mind, none of them giving much comfort to the hollow sensation that had settled in his stomach.
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A/N: I'm already more than halfway through the next section and hope to have it posted by tomorrow (Saturday). Feel free to yell at me, politely please, if you think it will help guarentee that. Reviews are appreciated. I'm hoping that this will get posted reasonably quickly now that I've finally figured out where I want it to go.
