Stacy lay by herself. The twelfth time in two weeks. She could feel her relationship with John slowly slipping away through her tender fingers. It's been this way since the engagement was officially stated. The parties, the visits, the invitations. All plans were made and the wedding was in less than a month but yet she found herself, alone. She sat there confused not understanding what was going on.
There was a time the two of them were the talk of the town, as much in love as two lovers could be. She can remember the small fight they got into over him practicing his raps throughout the house they built and shared together during all hours of the night. She still remembers the look on his face when he sighed and told her they needed to talk. That was a moment she was dreading. She remembers the nerves shooting through her body as he sat her down on the corner of the bed and kneeled down in front of her rubbing his hands up and down to warm her up. She was nervous she remembers as she let out a small giggle. He gave her a smile as he proceeded to quietly rap together about their previous two year relationship. It was obvious to her he was nervous as she was. When he spoke the final line of his rap especially for her, she can remember her shock and the beating of her heart quickening as he reached into the drawer pulling out a ring and speaking the line "Stacy, you make me happier than any man could ever dream to be, Will you marry me?" She couldn't stop the tears as they proceeded to roll down her cheeks as she accepted the proposal and they made love in celebration. Thinking back she still feels the same way, in disbelief that she was actually getting married to him.
Of course, that was six months ago and things had gone downhill from that point. She still was as in love with him as ever before, but as plans were coming to a close.. John became distant, and quiet. He seemed to not be interested in her. Stacy didn't want to believe what was happening but she couldn't beat around the bush anymore. Thoughts were racing in her head as to what could be going on. Could he not love her anymore? Could she bore him enough to not love her anymore? Does he want to spend little time with her and enjoy his time of being a bachelor? Could he.. perhaps, be seeing someone else on the side? No, it can't be she thought as she rolled on her side and brought the covers up over her shoulders. He loved her and she loved him, things would be better after the wedding she told herself. She wasn't so sure, but she kept repeating in her head that it will be, trying to convince herself of it.
She awoke the next morning, once again feeling alone. She emerged from bed feeling refreshed and anxious to work on John today and try to at least figure something out. She emerged out of bed and made her way into the kitchen they shared together where she found John in his boxer shorts standing over the counter reading the sports section of the newspaper. She smiled to herself as she made her way over to him wrapping her arms around his waist from behind and kissing his shoulderblade.
"Well, good morning John. How's my baby?"
John seemed tense and uneasy to her, this wasn't her John, something was wrong.
"Oh, what? Morning Stace."
"Where were you last night? You didn't come to bed.. I got kinda worried."
"Eh, I slept on the couch."
Stacy stayed silent, he was sleeping on the couch without even a fight? She tried to hold back her tears for she was starting to have her fill of it. She maintained her composure as she slid her hand along his abdomen.
"Well, why would you do that silly? I was.. all.. alone in our.. big bed waiting for you."
"Sorry.. guess I was just tired and didn't feel like going upstairs."
Stacy sighed and backed away slowly. She then smiled as she made her way toward the refrigerator.. opening the door.
"So babe, whatcha want for breakfast?"
He shook his head flipping the page to the newspaper.
"Not hungry."
"Well, d'ya want some coff--"
"No thanks."
Stacy couldn't understand what was going on. She sighed and leaned on the counter next to him trying to squeeze in between him and the newspaper. She smiled and slid her hand along his lower abdomen toying with the elastic to his boxers.
"Well, you know, we could always.. well, you know, spend the morning.. here.. together?"
Stacy winked to him as she slid her hand into his boxers. He smirked for a second before grabbing Stacy's wrist and pulling her hand out. Stacy pouted.
"Not now."
"John.. we haven't made love in over a month, and we haven't shared a day or night together in over two weeks. Something's wrong with you. Is it me? Am I doing something wrong!?"
John slammed his fist on the counter and rolled his eyes looking over at her. A cold dark stare that just depressed Stacy and made her feel like she was nothing.
"Jesus Stacy, does everything always have to be about you!?"
"No, I didn't say that, but I'm not just a person John! I'm your fiance, your world SHOULD revolve around me, because mine revolves around YOU!"
"Stacy, just because we're engaged does not mean everything I do, has to involve you.. the way I am, you said you loved. If you don't like it, then you just need to get over it."
"That's the thing John, I don't know who you are anymore.. Ever since the engagement was made official you've been different, more distant. Kinda like you don't want anything to do with me! Does that really make me think you love me!?"
"You KNOW I love you! Do we have to make love and constantly be together for me to show you that!? What's it gonna take to make you happy!?"
Stacy's face lowered as she laid her head on his shoulder, her voice softening.
"All I need is you to be happy John, just let me in some."
John forcefully walks away from her.
"Just.. stop Stacy, just stop with it already!"
Stacy lets out a quiet cry as he walks out into the living room and puts on a pair of jean shorts and a throwback jersey. Stacy desperately makes her way nxt to him. It's too late to turn back now.
"Stop what John!? Stop caring about you!? Stop loving you!? Is that what you want!? Do you want us to be over!? If so, tell me because i can't live like this anymore! I can't stand to see the man I love with all my heart act this way toward me!"
John stayed silent sitting on the couch, his hands folded and brought up to his face. Stacy sits next to him and rubs his back.
"John.. say something.. say what's on your mind.. please?"
John stared at her.. deep into her eyes.
"I'm not talking about this anymore.. I'm leaving, be home later."
He gets up and makes his way toward the door with Stacy running after him.
"Where are you going!?"
"Out."
"When are you gonna be home?"
"Later."
"That's just fine John, fine and dandy, walk away from all your problems.. you do it every other time anyway! What's so different about this time!?"
He slams the front door shut as Stacy falls to the ground and tears roll down her cheeks.
There was a time the two of them were the talk of the town, as much in love as two lovers could be. She can remember the small fight they got into over him practicing his raps throughout the house they built and shared together during all hours of the night. She still remembers the look on his face when he sighed and told her they needed to talk. That was a moment she was dreading. She remembers the nerves shooting through her body as he sat her down on the corner of the bed and kneeled down in front of her rubbing his hands up and down to warm her up. She was nervous she remembers as she let out a small giggle. He gave her a smile as he proceeded to quietly rap together about their previous two year relationship. It was obvious to her he was nervous as she was. When he spoke the final line of his rap especially for her, she can remember her shock and the beating of her heart quickening as he reached into the drawer pulling out a ring and speaking the line "Stacy, you make me happier than any man could ever dream to be, Will you marry me?" She couldn't stop the tears as they proceeded to roll down her cheeks as she accepted the proposal and they made love in celebration. Thinking back she still feels the same way, in disbelief that she was actually getting married to him.
Of course, that was six months ago and things had gone downhill from that point. She still was as in love with him as ever before, but as plans were coming to a close.. John became distant, and quiet. He seemed to not be interested in her. Stacy didn't want to believe what was happening but she couldn't beat around the bush anymore. Thoughts were racing in her head as to what could be going on. Could he not love her anymore? Could she bore him enough to not love her anymore? Does he want to spend little time with her and enjoy his time of being a bachelor? Could he.. perhaps, be seeing someone else on the side? No, it can't be she thought as she rolled on her side and brought the covers up over her shoulders. He loved her and she loved him, things would be better after the wedding she told herself. She wasn't so sure, but she kept repeating in her head that it will be, trying to convince herself of it.
She awoke the next morning, once again feeling alone. She emerged from bed feeling refreshed and anxious to work on John today and try to at least figure something out. She emerged out of bed and made her way into the kitchen they shared together where she found John in his boxer shorts standing over the counter reading the sports section of the newspaper. She smiled to herself as she made her way over to him wrapping her arms around his waist from behind and kissing his shoulderblade.
"Well, good morning John. How's my baby?"
John seemed tense and uneasy to her, this wasn't her John, something was wrong.
"Oh, what? Morning Stace."
"Where were you last night? You didn't come to bed.. I got kinda worried."
"Eh, I slept on the couch."
Stacy stayed silent, he was sleeping on the couch without even a fight? She tried to hold back her tears for she was starting to have her fill of it. She maintained her composure as she slid her hand along his abdomen.
"Well, why would you do that silly? I was.. all.. alone in our.. big bed waiting for you."
"Sorry.. guess I was just tired and didn't feel like going upstairs."
Stacy sighed and backed away slowly. She then smiled as she made her way toward the refrigerator.. opening the door.
"So babe, whatcha want for breakfast?"
He shook his head flipping the page to the newspaper.
"Not hungry."
"Well, d'ya want some coff--"
"No thanks."
Stacy couldn't understand what was going on. She sighed and leaned on the counter next to him trying to squeeze in between him and the newspaper. She smiled and slid her hand along his lower abdomen toying with the elastic to his boxers.
"Well, you know, we could always.. well, you know, spend the morning.. here.. together?"
Stacy winked to him as she slid her hand into his boxers. He smirked for a second before grabbing Stacy's wrist and pulling her hand out. Stacy pouted.
"Not now."
"John.. we haven't made love in over a month, and we haven't shared a day or night together in over two weeks. Something's wrong with you. Is it me? Am I doing something wrong!?"
John slammed his fist on the counter and rolled his eyes looking over at her. A cold dark stare that just depressed Stacy and made her feel like she was nothing.
"Jesus Stacy, does everything always have to be about you!?"
"No, I didn't say that, but I'm not just a person John! I'm your fiance, your world SHOULD revolve around me, because mine revolves around YOU!"
"Stacy, just because we're engaged does not mean everything I do, has to involve you.. the way I am, you said you loved. If you don't like it, then you just need to get over it."
"That's the thing John, I don't know who you are anymore.. Ever since the engagement was made official you've been different, more distant. Kinda like you don't want anything to do with me! Does that really make me think you love me!?"
"You KNOW I love you! Do we have to make love and constantly be together for me to show you that!? What's it gonna take to make you happy!?"
Stacy's face lowered as she laid her head on his shoulder, her voice softening.
"All I need is you to be happy John, just let me in some."
John forcefully walks away from her.
"Just.. stop Stacy, just stop with it already!"
Stacy lets out a quiet cry as he walks out into the living room and puts on a pair of jean shorts and a throwback jersey. Stacy desperately makes her way nxt to him. It's too late to turn back now.
"Stop what John!? Stop caring about you!? Stop loving you!? Is that what you want!? Do you want us to be over!? If so, tell me because i can't live like this anymore! I can't stand to see the man I love with all my heart act this way toward me!"
John stayed silent sitting on the couch, his hands folded and brought up to his face. Stacy sits next to him and rubs his back.
"John.. say something.. say what's on your mind.. please?"
John stared at her.. deep into her eyes.
"I'm not talking about this anymore.. I'm leaving, be home later."
He gets up and makes his way toward the door with Stacy running after him.
"Where are you going!?"
"Out."
"When are you gonna be home?"
"Later."
"That's just fine John, fine and dandy, walk away from all your problems.. you do it every other time anyway! What's so different about this time!?"
He slams the front door shut as Stacy falls to the ground and tears roll down her cheeks.
