Author's Note: Okay, so I've been writing for years, but this is the first time I've ever posted something. So, review- pretty, pretty, please. And be gentle...but honest. Obviously I own none of the actual Grey's characters, I only own Ava. This is a one-shot, but there are three other one-shot's related to this, if people want them.
Finally
She is not Meredith Grey anymore. In fact, she hasn't been for just over three years. Professionally she has chosen to hyphenate her new and old last names, while in her personal life she chooses to simply bear her husband's surname. Husband. It had been a foreign word to her for so long, especially with her own father leaving so many years ago, that she couldn't believe how comfortable it was now. It seemed to slip easily off her tongue, as a lot of words that used to give her trouble now did. Married, surgeon, wife, mother. All titles that used to trouble her, titles that now defined her. Yes, she is a surgeon, a realization of a dream. She is also a wife and mother, a realization of her biggest fears. But though she has only been a wife for three years, and a mother for only eighteen months, neither frightens her any longer. She is good at this, she thinks, finally. She is finally good at living life, not just prolonging or ending it. She has finally learned to live, and make mistakes, and move on. To be happy. She has learned not to fear plans of any kind, to allow herself to see a future. She is not Meredith Grey anymore. She is Dr. Meredith Grey. Meredith Grey, attending. She is the mother of Avery Eleanor, fondly known as Ava. She is the wife of Dr. Finn Dandridge, fondly known as McVet. She is the equal of Drs. Derek and Addison Shepherd.
Every day she passes both in the halls, sometimes assisting both in cases. She offers a nod of recognition, a cordial smile. Things will never stop being tense, but every time she waves at one of them and the light catches her engagement and wedding bands, she smiles to herself, proud and thankful that for once she made the right decision. For once she didn't run away from something wonderful and terrifying. Something scary and damaged. Looking up from the charts she was studying, a man and a girl caught her eye, coming through the main entrance.
"Hi", she spoke softly, an enormous smile gracing her face. She leaned in for a kiss, only to be interrupted by the little girl in her arms who cheerily chirped, "Hi Mama." The words warmed Meredith's heart in a way she never knew possible. On the nights Meredith worked, Finn often stopped by, allowing mother and daughter to spend a few moments together and giving him some time with his wife as well.
"Dr. Dandridge", a voice called, breaking the moment as both Finn and Meredith turned. It was Derek, stopping by to say hello to the two. After a few years it had ceased to amaze Meredith that Derek could be near to her, could be watching her, and she would have no clue, no feeling for it. If not for the heads up from Izzie, Cristina (Yang in the hospital, Burke outside of it, thank you very much), and George, and the occasional icy glare from Addison, Meredith would never know.
"How are you doing, Finn?" Derek asked politely, reaching to shake his former vet's hand.
"Can't complain", Finn responded cheerfully. It had taken much time and convincing to get Finn to believe that there were no longer any feelings between the two, on Meredith's part anyway. Finn no longer worried now, and could chat easily with his once upon a time rival.
"And how's Ava?" he asked, smiling at the little girl, a carbon copy of Meredith, but with Finn's soft, caring eyes.
Finn looked down at his daughter sweetly, "Tell Dr. Shepherd you're good, baby girl."
"I good", the little girl repeated shyly, her eyes focused downward.
"How's Addison doing?" came Finn's response, and both Dandridges pretended not to notice the disconcerting mix of discontent and disinterest that flashed in Derek's eyes.
"She's fine" he said unconvincingly. "She's fine."
"That's good", Finn smiled kindly. "I hate to run off, but I really have to get her home. I just wanted to stop by quickly and let Ava see her Mommy."
"it was good to see you, Finn", Derek answered, shaking the veterinarian's hand once again. "Bye, Ava", he smiled. The little girl waved in response. Derek walked off leaving the couple alone and happy once again.
"I don't want you to go", Meredith pouted at her husband.
"No pout, Mama", Ava scolded her, causing Finn to laugh.
"Yeah, no pout, Mama", Finn repeated. "I don't want to go either Mer, but I really have to get Ava home and put her to b-e-d."
"I know", Meredith sighed. "I just miss you." Meredith felt more than lucky sometimes. The fact that she had someone to miss, two people to miss, waiting for her when she got home everyday, good and bad, was beyond her. She would never know what she did to deserve this, but she refused to question it.
"Aw, Meredith, I miss you too. I promise, I'll be waiting up for you when you get home."
"Seriously?", she teased good-naturedly, knowing that her husband could never quite manage to wait up.
"Seriously", he proclaimed with confidence. "And if I'm not, I seriously want you to wake me up."
"I will", Meredith replied with a smile, "I love you." The words were easy now, now that no guilt or desperation was attached.
"I love you too", came Finn's equally easy reply. The two leaned in for a short but passionate kiss before Meredith lifted the baby into her arms.
"I love you baby girl" she said softly, hugging Ava to her tightly and kissing the girl lightly on the head.
"Love Mama", was Ava's response. The little girl's words touched Meredith as always.
Stealing one final kiss from his wife, Finn and Ava waved goodbye and left Seattle Grace.
Meredith Grey no longer existed. Meredith Grey was lonely and bitter, scary and damaged, and extinct. Meredith Dandridge was loved and confident. She was happy. Things weren't perfect for Meredith. Her mother was still alive, but would never comprehend the existence of her son-in-law and granddaughter. She had never reconciled with her father, though Finn brought it up every so often and Meredith did sometimes consider it. And though she knew how lucky she was to have a husband who had a flexible enough schedule to work and watch their daughter simultaneously, her long hours did, on many occassions, make her ache for Finn and Avery. But Meredith Dandridge could not complain. She had more than she could have hoped for. This is what she thought as she walked through the halls of the hospital. This is what brought a smile to her face as she passed by Derek Shepherd without a glance. She had everything. Finally. +
