Tuesday
September 1, 1977
Kings Cross Station
Sirius Black is quite possibly the most dreadful human being to ever have been born.
In fact, I am not entirely sure that he is a person. He's probably a leech that's been transfigured into a humanesque form.
I don't even know what he was thinking, I mean honestly? I do not care if he was going to be given thirty galleons or that I would receive half of them. I honest to Merlin do not care.
There I was, I had just said goodbye to my mother and father and pushed my trolley through the barrier when he jumped me! No, "hi, Bishop!" or, "fancy seeing you here at the train station for the school we both attend!" It in fact sounded awfully a lot more like, "Despite the fact that you despise me, I think we should snog!" (Except without the despising part).
What?
I mean, honestly?
Is he completely and utterly bonkers?
Has he been drinking too much babbling beverage?
I had walked in and was looking forward to starting the school year on a positive note. My mother no longer cried when she dropped me off at Kings Cross which I took as a good sign.
It seems I should not have taken that as a good sign, because as soon as I walked in I was ambushed from behind, and naturally I thought it was Lily or Charlotte, but no. If the force of the hug wasn't a big enough clue that it wasn't them, him whispering, "I think we should snog," cemented it (unless they had developed an odd Eva fetish overnight).
You know when you're in a situation and the adrenaline kicks in and you're no longer in control of your body? This was one of those situations. I took the opportunity to kick his shin. Hard. Very, very hard. I may have also elbowed him in the stomach. I am unaware if it's just me, but kicking people gives me a certain sort of happiness, especially when one of those people is a member of the Marauders, or, as they should be referred to as, the Bloody Prat Quadruplet.
"What the bloody hell did you do that for, Bishop?" Black growled, clutching his shin. I stared at him. I felt a grin coming on. Wait, never mind.
"I could ask you the same question, Black." He frowned and narrowed his eyes in apparent confusion. "Or have you forgotten already? Have you lost your bloody mind?"
Black's grin returned to his face. "Oh," he said brightly. "That."
"Yes," I glowered at him. "That. Mind telling me how life as the only living brain donor is?"
My poor attempt at insulting him ended up with his grin spreading even wider than it previously was. "Well I'm pretty sure you heard me the first time, Evelyn, but if you so desperately want to hear me say it again then I would be most happy to oblige."
"I don't know what you're talking about," I retorted.
Black took a step closer and then paused, staring into my eyes. "I think that we should snog."
Ahh, there it was again.
Here enters James Potter, the complete and utter hare-brained fool, with the witty, "well aren't you two bipolar today?"
"Well if you wouldn't mind telling me why he's lost his mind I would quite possibly be slightly more agreeable," I glowered.
Potter beamed. "Oh, yes. I thought it would go down a bit like this. You see, I woke up this morning and thought, my oh my, what would be a good way to make today a bit more interesting? I always have galleons to spare-"
"Arrogant toerag," I muttered.
"-so I told Padfoot here that if he got you to kiss him I'd give him thirty galleons."
"Thirty galleons!"
Potter shrugged. "Yep, thirty. But of course he wasn't able to do it, so... no one gets any money. More's the pity."
"Yeah," Black whined. "And I was going to give you half for your participation!"
Now I had two people to glower at and it wasn't even 11 o'clock yet! Speaking of 11 o'clock, I hadn't loaded my belongings yet and that meant I had to yank my trunk over to the accommodating trunk lifter and hop onto the Express.
I stared at them for a bit as I tried to collect my thoughts from the tangled mush pit of despair they had sunken into.
"Well?" Black inquired.
"Don't ever suggest that again, to my face, thank you. I'm not afraid to cross wands with you."
"You want me to take out my wand?" He asked, looking surprisingly happy for someone who had just lost the opportunity to win 30 galleons.
"I would love it if you took out your wand, Black, but now is not the time. I need to get on the train. You can stay here and do whatever you want with your wand if you'd like."
Black grinned. "Probably for the best. Might not be the most appropriate thing to do right now with all these firsties around. Rain check?"
I glared at him and turned my back. I saw Potter give him a high five out of the corner of my eye.
The train was delightfully half-empty when I hopped on. The first years were all still wandering hopelessly around the platform, and the second and third years still hadn't received the get-on-the-train-earlyish-to-get-good-seats memo. The fourth years and fifth years had taken up some of the compartments, and the sixth years were standing around gossiping outside their chosen compartments, leaving the sevenths years to get on the train hopefully before all the good compartments were taken.
My yearly compartment was the third one from the back, and luckily was still empty after I kicked out some atrociously behaving fourth years with the threat of removing house points (the wonders of being a prefect). It was barely 10:50, so of course Lottie wasn't here yet. Her punctuality resembled the remains of a three-hundred year old leaf that had crumbled away 299 years ago(that is to say, non-existent).
Lily is the more punctual of the three of us, and knowing her, was already in the Prefects compartment, being Head Girl and all. Now that I mention it - I should probably be there (I know, shocker), but I have to wait until that ruddy friend of mine appears so she can take control of this compartment!
Well speak of the devil, here she is now.
Tuesday
September 1, 1977
The Hogwarts Express
So.
I have discovered some things.
Interesting and unfortunate things.
Things that I will proceed to document.
After Lottie blustered into the compartment, hair sticking up all over the place like an electrocuted chihuahua, I was successfully able to enter the prefects compartment.
Guess who was blooming Head Boy?
James bloody Potter.
That absolute twunt head was Head Boy.
Well that was possibly the most unexpected development. I was fully expecting the most realistic option, also known as Remus Lupin, to have had Head Boyness bestowed upon his perfect, screwed-on-correctly head.
What on earth has the world come to?
I was fully expecting my future husband (not that he knows) to be Head Boy. After all, he deserves it.
The other interesting thing that I discovered whilst in the prefects meeting is that despite his many large and obvious abundant faults, Potter may have some slight minor ability to make a half-decent Head Boy. Despite already having an altercation on the platform, Potter managed to somehow reign in his seemingly endless immaturity in order to make 'adult decisions.'
I never said that though, okay diary?
Okay Eva.
Okay.
Tuesday
September 1, 1977
Still on the Hogwarts Express
Well, after the fatefully woeful prefects meeting (by woeful, I am referring of course to the presence of Potter), Lily sort of stormed off to our compartment in a Head Girlish manner (and by that I mean walked calmly but I didn't want to get too close in case I burst into flames or something).
Lottie, being Lottie, noticed Lily's foul mood as soon as we walked in. "What's got your hippogriff in a twizzle?"
Lily glowered and scowled and spoke all sorts of obscenities before answering. "Potter, the bloody prat, was made Head Boy, and he didn't bloody think it important enough to inform me."
"He what?!" Lottie spluttered, her mouth opening and closing with an awful similarity to a fish. "Head Boy? But surely, Remus-"
"Head Boy, I tell you. Dumbledore's completely and utterly off his rocker, he's gone barmy, lost his bloody marbles!" Lily threw her hands up in the air.
"He's crazy," I echoed helpfully.
"What was he thinking? That's really rotten luck, Lily. Especially with everything that happened over the summer."
"I know," Lily grumbled, plonking down next to Lottie. "Potter'll probably be too busy ruining my life to pay any attention whatsoever to his Head Boy duties. What's the bet he'll destroy the school while he's at it."
After Lily had finished ranting about James Potter, we were able to settle down and play a riveting game of exploding snap. The train ride is awfully long, you see.
Poor Lily. She didn't deserve the horror that is Potter to have an even larger presence in her life. I mean Lily will be a great Head Girl, obviously. I mean she's a whizz at potions, and who's good at potions besides Severus Snape? Lily is, apparently. Lottie and I used to think she bribed him to help her write all her essays because he's half in love with her. Or was? I'm not really up to date with anything. Either way, it doesn't matter because they stopped talking mostly in fifth year, so it's obvious Lily has her own potions ability.
It does make sense though as to why Snape liked her though, despite being a Slytherin. She's so nice to people that aren't being prats, the most loyal friend, and she's really pretty with her bright red hair. Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure the first thing James Potter said to her was to ask if her head was on fire, and well, that probably started their hundred-year war.
Lottie and I aren't quite so good at potions. I mean, I'm alright, but not nearly as good as I am with charms. Lottie's kind of rubbish at it though. If it wasn't for Lily there's no way she would have gotten into NEWT level potions. She's also the only one of us who's actually related to someone magical - her mum's a witch. She has a sister (Julie) who's in fifth year, and a brother (Mark) in third year. Lottie's very quiet - except with the people she knows, and she likes to sleep. And eggs. She's always eating eggs.
And well-
Oh wait.
Oh, not now.
Tuesday
September 1, 1977
Still on the Hogwarts Express
Moral of this story: remember to tell friends about certain snogging related incidents before the other persons involved tell them.
We were interrupted from our intense game of exploding snap by some gits who obviously aren't intelligent enough to work out how to entertain themselves without pestering other people. It's not as if I went away over the summer and didn't get to see Lily or Lottie, is it? I totally did not want to spend this time purely with them so I could catch up on everything I missed, did I?
Instead, Potter and Black flung open the compartment door and barged inside.
Lily raised an eyebrow. "What do you think you are doing, Potter, because I'm pretty sure I told you that I didn't want to speak to you?"
Potter pretended to think before answering, "No idea what you're talking about. What I do know is that it's rather cold. We might come in." They closed the door behind them.
Lily was about to yell at him when the door opened again and my one and only true love, Remus Lupin, and Peter hopped in. "Oh hi, boys and girls," Peter waved hello. "Fancy seeing you here!"
Remus sat down on my right (swoon), across from Potter who had successfully squished himself in next to Lily. Peter squeezed in between the wall and Lottie, who was opposite Black, who had decided to sit next to yours truly (I'll kill him later).
I don't know how Remus puts up with that terror for a mate. It must be his increased level of maturity.
"I don't know what you think you're doing here Potter," Lily growled, "but I think you should leave."
"Oh?" He replied. "Well I'm not here for you Lily, we're here for Bishop!"
"What?"
About fifty percent of the people in the room looked confused by this statement. Normally Potter's terrorising of innocent people extends to Lily, the Slytherins, and unaware firsties.
"Oh yes," Black grinned. "Earlier on the platform we were talking about the most interesting subject, and we thought we should continue that conversation."
Dammit, Black.
"What conversation?" Lottie asked, confused.
"Merlin's beard, Black! Do you have problems with rejection?" I spluttered.
"What conversation?" Lottie echoed, still confused.
Potter and Black grinned. "Did Evelyn not tell you?" queried Black. "It's truly a riveting tale."
"Well," I divulged, "long story short, Potter's paying Black thirty galleons if he can get in a nice snog in with me."
Lily's eyes bulged and Remus choked on his water.
"He what?!" Lily bellowed.
Lily gets kind of dramatic about these things. Potter kind of triggers that in her. So do I, actually.
Potter appeared unconcerned with Lily's reaction. "Well you see, I had this money just lying around and I -"
"Out, Potter," Lily growled. He looked slightly startled at Lily's outburst, but remained seated. "I said get out, Potter!" Lily said again, putting full force into her anti-Potter glare. "You too, Black, and Remus and Peter. Leave."
"Wha
Tuesday
September 1, 1977
Hogwarts Dormitory
Oops. Spilt my ink.
It's almost 12:30am now, so I'm not going to finish recounting the entire story but you get the basic idea. Lily yelled, Potter left and then Lily yelled at Black, leaving Peter, Remus, Lottie and I to sort of look confused, but eventually all the Marauders were gone. Then Lily had the nerve to yell at me! At me!
What had I done?
Now that I think about it, why was she so upset? It wasn't even about her.
She's completely bonkers.
Ooh, my owl, Selene, just arrived with the annual you just arrived at school it's been a day I can't handle the separation letter from my mother.
I'll read it in the morning. It's too late for me to write what else happened last night.
After the eventful day I've just had, I very much need to sleep.
AN: Hey all! This is the first chapter of my fic, in the style of Commentarius by B.C. Daily! Please leave feedback and/or ideas below.
XOX
