Hello! I wanted to write a fic focused on Harley and Joker's relationship, the ups and downs. They always get in fights, often physical ones, but she's really getting sick of it lately. Enjoy!

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'Talking'

Fixes Everything

Harley frowned as she sat on the couch with a glass of wine, waiting for him to come home.

He'd left her behind again. Again, she thought angrily. It's been happening increasingly more often of late, just as she seemed to piss him off even more often than that. But she had been snarling and snapping against her bonds; she was fighting back more.

As an woman, she would always love her man. She didn't need codling or snuggles, kisses on her eyelids. Blech. The Joker satisfied her in a more primal way, rough and tumble, bites and hickeys always adorning the both of them.

Harley smirked at the thought and looked down at her shoulder where he'd bitten her just last night.

But as a woman, she wouldn't let his abuse continue much longer. She'd make him pay one way or another.

Women, as an unwritten rule, were the fairer sex, the weaker sex, the more emotional sex. Well, Harley shrugged, it was moderately true. She'd never be able to pick Joker up they way he could pick her up, nor would he ever cry like she cried while she screamed at him in rage for hitting her.

But, she conceded, god had made women weaker but he also gave them the cunning and intelligence to protect themselves and their children from their 'big, strong man'.

She could easily kill the Joker; all it took was a knife to his jugular in the throes of passion, a drop of poison in his black coffee she made him every morning. And he'd never know what hit him...

But she wasn't a quitter. She was going to show him he wasn't going to fuck with her and get away with it. She was an Irishwoman after all...

Her father had been a big Irishman who worked on the docks at Gotham to keep them afloat after coming to America. He liked to drink and be rowdy. But her mother always awed her when she cut the man down with a single look. Don't mess with the woman of the house.

Harley was smiling as she heard the front door unlock. She was still sitting on the couch, arms draped over the pillows with her legs tucked under her, glass of wine in hand. She was wearing the black silk teddy that she'd sent her personal lackey to fetch for her, and because she ordered online all the time and they couldn't have a real mailbox, he was one of the few who had been in the picture for a while.

But Harley knew she looked good and when he stepped inside the room, his eyes darkened accordingly.

"Well, well..." he said, his voice rough with the exhaustion of the job. It had taken all night. "Have you thought about what you've done, little girl?"

Harley merely smirked in answer.

He moved across the room slowly and she jumped up, downed the rest of her wine before setting it down softly. She wasn't going to be sitting, nor sober, when she fought him off.

It was always the same every night that he left her there. He expected her to keep quiet about their previous argument and be his compliant little bed-slave.

Her big blue eyes met his and she smiled, causing him to stop his advance and look her over. "Happy to see me then?" he asked.

"Of course I'm happy when you come back, because I never know if you're safe or not when I'm not there with you." His hand was swift and she found her throat caught within his grip.

"I told you I was done talking about this before I left." he hissed.

"You always decide what I should say or do. But I'm not done talking about it." she whispered just before she shattered the wine glass on the table and slashed it across his chest, cutting a button off his outer coat.

He snarled and caught her by the hair, yanking back roughly before he dragged her toward their bedroom.

"We're not doing anything in there!" she yelled. "You're going to fucking listen this time!" Harley used the glass to cut across the top of his hand before he dropped her to the ground and she rolled to the side before he could think about kicking her.

She leapt to her feet and immediately flipped backward, knocking him in the face with her bare heel. The force caused him to stagger back, clutching his face in shock. He stood up straight and patted beneath his nose, coming away with blood. He looked up then, and the way he was watching her sent chills up her spine. Irish or not, she was scared.

Joker dramatically frowned as he looked back down at his hand, pretending he didn't realize he'd just been smashed in the face by the only person he really trusted. "Harley," he said with a tsk, "You shouldn't jump around like that, honey bunny. You could hurt someone." he barked with laugher and literally sobered up in a blink, glaring openly at her from across the room.

"I think...I should teach you a lesson."

"You're not." she hissed back. "I'm going to Red's house. You can stay here and fuck yourself, cause I'm done with you."

"Oh, but Harls, I'm nooo-t done with you."

She never saw him move so fast, and she was reminded intensely of how dangerous he was when he caught her by the neck and lifted her up in the air, her short height causing her legs to flail in the air.

He didn't enjoy this, as much as he knew everyone thought he did. He cared for Harley and he wanted her with him despite their clashing personalities, which often ended up with a violent argument. Though he did secretly love her fire.

He watched, reluctantly, as her eyes searched for a way out of her situation, before they resolutely landed on his. Those eyes demanded retribution and bloody revenge. He couldn't wait.

"Don't," she choked out and when he only squeezed harder at her plea, her vision went red with rage. With a swift intake of breath, she released it with a howl that chilled even the Joker's blood.

She hauled her legs up above his head and caught his neck in a chokehold with her powerful thighs. They wrestled about together and she eventually snatched his messy hair in her hands, pulling relentlessly. If he wanted to play rough, by god she was going to pay him back.

The door to their own personal section of the warehouse they and the clown henchmen called home opened, and in stepped the lackey that dropped off things Joker and Harley ordered.

He had a bag in his hand and had gone one step into the room when he spotted the couple in multiple chokeholds, both looking determined to kill each other.

The man gasped when the two pairs of eyes caught sight of their intruder, and he blurted out and apology before he tripped over himself to leave the room.

With the threat gone, they returned full force to trying to overpower the other. Harley gritted her teeth as she swiftly loosened her hold, then snapped them back together with a force that rattled Joker's teeth.

He released a shout of pain and dropped her neck from his grip causing her upper body to fall back and dangle before his own.

But he didn't continue his torture in another painful avenue. In fact, he seemed to realize from the new angle that her black, silky attire covering her torso was matched by the tiny panties she was wearing.

With the perfect position, Joker smiled down at her as his head leaned to the side to see her face. Harley's glare disappeared to a look of shock and complete unease. "No! Don't you dare!"

"Harley..." he said huskily and she dropped her head back in defeat at just how easily his voice could arouse her. "Poor choice of words."

Joker, still holding up her one hundred and ten pounds above the floor with her legs around his neck still tight, yanked her panties to the side and lowered his head. Her shout of mixed delight and anger rung his ears, but he was having too much fun now to care.

This was why he refused to let her go. They always fought, always disagreed. But they always made up and it was never unsatisfying. And the best part? He'd never been happier.

"Mmm, Harley," he groaned and ran a hand down her front to grab one of her breasts, "Put up more of a fight, would you?"

She knew he was goading her to do something reckless, but she also knew he secretly wanted her not fight, to succumb to him. But his tongue felt amazing, so she decided for the later.

"Shut up." she hissed and ran her hands up his hips as best she could. It gave him pleasure and he returned the favor by burying his tongue with her core.

The shock of an abrupt orgasm caused her to lose the strength to keep her hold on his shoulders with her legs, but his strength once again amazed her when he caught her from falling and held onto her torso while letting her feet far to the floor. While she struggled to recover from the intense orgasm he'd given her, he lifted her body into his arms and went straight to the bedroom.

"Why do you always get what you want?" she moaned dejectedly. She always gives in, always renews the vicious cycle.

"You got what you wanted too, Harls." he said and nipped her shoulder before he set her on the bed. "We got to, ah, talk about our disagreement earlier."

"You're not helping yourself by fucking me now. I'm still going to leave tonight." she said, softly but seriously.

Her words stuck him sharply, as if she'd just jammed a knife in his heart. But he pushed away his guilt and pulled her back to him, his scarred lips moving slowly across her neck and collarbone. "Don't say things you can't back up." he whispered and took off his coat, jacket, and vest.

When he looked back, Harley was sitting up, looking at him sadly. It caused him to stop moving and watch her carefully. "Look, doll," he said affectionately. "If this is about you staying here when I'm gone then...well, you can start coming with me more."

To his surprise she began to cry.

"Hey, ah, Harls...stop that." he said warily. He'd never actually seen her cry out of sadness. Sure she would cry out of anger or out of happiness, but never had he made her cry out of true sadness. It just wasn't his normal Harley.

"What's wrong?" he asked finally as he sat down on the bed beside her, his hands to himself.

She stood up and began to pace, wiping her face roughly to clean them of her tears. It did embarrass her, she never cried in front of him unless she was mad. So she chanced a look behind her, and what she saw broke her resolve.

He looked lost, like he actually realized that she could potentially leave for good. She hadn't planned on it, she was just going to leave for a few nights. But she knew she couldn't just crawl on back to him now. He wouldn't learn anything, and it would just continue their painful, rarely rewarding relationship.

With a deep breath, she stepped over to him and held his head in her hands, lifting his face.

His makeup was streaked and he looked tired, very tired. Harley sighed as his dark green eyes met hers in a warning, or perhaps a plea. Don't go...

But she lowered her head and kissed him softly, running her hands through his hair lovingly, before she leaned back up and went to the closet.

She pulled on some jeans, yanked on a jacket over the black teddy and dumped some clothes into her duffel bag. She didn't need any toiletries, cause Red was always prepared just in case something like this happened.

When Harley came back into the room, the Joker had fallen back on the bed, his feet on the floor as he looked up at the ceiling fan.

"Jay," she said quietly. She waited, hoped he would look up at her, but he didn't even act as if he heard her. "Bye." she said and left the room, then their place.

She stepped down the old warehouse stairs and all the clowns who worked for Joker looked up, with respect. They must have heard about their little fight. "See ya boys," she said, her voice strong and authoritative whenever she spoke around them. She couldn't show fear around them, but she felt very real fear as she stepped out of the warehouse and walked towards Gotham.

It was a good thing Ivy had her cell phone on at all times, cause Red showed up within minutes from Harley calling.

"Hey, baby girl." Poison Ivy herself said as she leaned over to open the door for her best friend.

"Hey, Red." she said and entered the Escalade. "Hm, this is a bit...not ozone friendly."

"Oh, I know what you are thinking," Ivy said, "But it's a hybrid...and electric. I used my wiles to have it specially made. Free of charge."

Harley smirked and looked in the side mirror as Red drove away. She hoped Joker would understand and not attempt to kill her if he ever found her. But Ivy- like she said- had her wiles, and the Joker wouldn't be able to find them unless Poison Ivy wanted him to.

000

"What do you mean, she can't be found?!" Joker snarled at the clown he'd tasked with the job to find Harley.

"B-Boss it's like she dropped off the face of the earth! The boys can't find her anywheres!"

Without a single thought at all, the Joker withdrew his gun and fired. He ignored the gore and brain mass on his sleeve as he turned and left the open room of the warehouse and headed up stairs towards his and Harley's...

He stopped and turned, looking twitchy and murderous on the stairs above all his lackeys. More than a few of them were covered in blood and brains.

"I want her found, or one of you will die every single day she's gone. You know what? Make that every hour." Another one of the clowns went down from a bullet of Joker's gun and he shrugged. "Starting now. Go."

The room cleared even before he had made it up the stairs and entered the clean, domestic looking apartment with no emotions on his face.

He saw the glass that he still hadn't cleaned up from three nights ago, but he did not clean it. It reminded him of their fight, of her fury and pain. It forced him to realize that she had only acted out so violently because she'd felt the need to protect herself.

He had not realized how rough he'd been on her until she reacted.

The Joker smashed his hands into his hair, grabbing fistfuls of it, yanking until he feared blood would rush out from his head. He let out a roar, releasing hair, and he flailed out, smashing the lamps Harley had found for their place, slashed the leather couch she'd asked him to help pick out on a catalog.

After the room was in shambles and he'd accidentally cut his arm, Joker finally stopped moving and his knees gave out, causing him to collapse onto the torn couch behind.

"I fucking need her." he said, and his face looked astonished at the complete truth that had fallen from his lips. "She's the only thing I love...but I hurt her." Joker seemed to really think about it.

If he wanted and needed Harley so much...why would he want to hurt her?

000

Ivy had just gotten home from the grocery store and she smiled at Harley asleep on the couch. She was so happy that Quinny had actually stood up to Joker and had stayed away from him for one full week.

It was a time to celebrate in Ivy's book, so she'd bought rose wine and lots of snacks, including chocolate.

She set up the snacks on the coffee table and turned on the television, where it happened to be on the evening news. She smirked at Harley's compulsion to watch for her man on the news reports, and Ivy wondered at how many women in the world could make such a boast.

But when she looked away from her sleeping friend and back up at the television, she nearly choked on the air in her lungs.

As shaky camera was filming a group of hostages, clearly people of the higher social ranks of Gotham, all tied and gagged in a circle together. This had that makeup wearing freak written all over it.

Reluctantly, Ivy reached over and shook Harley's shoulder. "Quinn, wake up sweets." she whispered softly.

Harley yawned and stretched accidentally elbowing Ivy in the process. "Oh, I'm sorry!"

But Ivy wasn't concerned with it. She grabbed her friend's jaw and turned the woman's face to the television which just so happened to be moving to the face of the asshole of the millenia himself.

"Jay!" Harley barked and sat up in an instant, her hands grasping Ivy's in an iron grip.

"I am not addressing Gotham, nor am I speaking to the 'Batman'," he said, his makeup streaked but still covering his features. He looked even more dangerous than usual. "I am asking for my little Harlequin to come see me for that date we've been 'talking' about. I've got a present for you, doll." He was grinning maniaclly, but for some reason, Harley knew he was just trying to save face and protect the fear he'd injected within Gotham city. "If you're not here in one hour, Harlequin, I won't be able to let you have any of the fun." He ended on a crazed laugh that would have chilled another person to the core, but it warmed Harley's heart at his thoughtfulness that he would address her own the news.

"Red?" she said sweetly as the shocked news anchors replaced the Joker.

"God damn it," Ivy hissed and rubbed her temple. "Alright, but at least have a chocolate bar and some wine with me while I do your makeup."

"You know I would never turn you down, Red." Harley said as she snatched a chocolate.

"You know where he is?" Ivy said as they got up and opened up the box with the item they'd been working on together over the entire week.

"Oh yeah."

000

Her time was growing shorter and shorter, and the Joker had never been more nervous in his entire life. If she didn't come, she'd officially left him and never planned to come back.

He wasn't a nail biter, and since he didn't deal with nervousness ever, he just killed people, or more specifically his many Lackeys that had come along.

He'd gone through five of them, was about to turn on the sixth, until a sudden wail from one of the women hostages had him spinning around.

She was here...

Her outfit, completely different from her little red dress and black boots from before, had become a slim, formfitting two-toned bodysuit that hugged her small form and every last curve she sexily sported.

She walked over, hips swaying seductively, her blue eyes stark against the black surrounding her eyes and the white makeup on her face. Her lips were black but they looked so kissable the Joker dropped the clown he'd been about to kill.

But as she neared him she became every bit the playful yet lethal Harlequin, trotting and spinning toward the hostages. The spin had him practically panting...

It gave him a perfect visual of the shiny black and red vinyl suit that hugged the generous curve of her ass and ample breasts.

When she turned on him, he had been so close to creaming his jeans. "Hi ya, Mr. J!" she sang, in the voice she used to disguise her normal one. "When I saw you on tv I was soo excited that you would call me here!" she said and stepped up to him to rest her hand on his chest and lean under his open arm as he pulled her into his side.

"I'm glad you came." he said lowly and kissed her under her jawline, effectively causing her eyes to roll back in pure pleasure. "Love the hat," he growled, "And ah, the outfit." He emphasized the t, and she knew he was very pleased. His hand around her back moved down over her ass and he cupped it roughly, nearly lifting her off her feet.

"Glad you like it." she whispered back, and then went back into character. "So, Mr. J, what were ya plannin' on doin' ta these Gotham whores?"

"Well," he said, his tongue clicking. "You can do whatever you want with them, because I got 'em for you, doll." he said, still a little buzzed from having her sexy form so lined in the tight red and black right before him. He was close to tossing her over his shoulder and forget about all the chaos they could potentially cause. But she looked so excited, he would be willing to do whatever she wanted.

"Well Mr. J," she began, walking her fingers slowly up his vest. "While I am really grateful for the present, and letting me decide what to do tonight...what I really want to do..."

"Yeah, Harl?" he pressed when she stopped and looked over to the hostages, his voice breathy and excitable.

"I would rather do you." she said darkly and looked back up to him, her eyes sultry and hopeful.

His grin was a mile wide as he shot his arms out to his sides and shrugged towards the terrified hostages. "Sorry that I had to borrow all of you, but the party's over. We're kicking you out."

Harley smirked as the Joker picked her up effortlessly and turned around to leave the warehouse of their old hideout.

When they came outside, one of the clowns was there leaning against the suv they often drove. "Whoa! Hey boss! Ah, sorry but I was just taking a break." he said and noticed the woman in his arms. "Whoa! Harley is that you?"

"Just drive to the warehouse. Now!" he yelled, and he smirked when Harley brandished her gun towards the clown.

"You heard the man. The party's over, now we wanna go home."

Joker might have been annoyed before, but he was just so happy to have her back and better than ever. Sexier than he'd ever seen...

They got in the back seat, and the suv barreled onto the road while Harley crawled over his lap and pulled off her jester hat, allowing her platinum hair to tumble over her shoulders.

If he was hard before, he was a rock now.

Harley smiled as she wiggled her hips to mold her lower half to the tent of his pants and rubbed against him. "Easy, girl." he growled with a grin over his lips.

She pulled the purple lapel of his coat and brought his lips to her own for a rough and highly passionate kiss. Their tongues did battle for a while before they pulled apart to finally breathe.

As they looked at each other, he suddenly closed his eyes and sighed, as if disappointed.

Alarmed, Harley ran her hand up his neck. "Jay? Something wrong."

"Harley, babe, love of my life," he said and caught her incredible smile at his words. "I know you wanted to work with me more, but my work is going to start going down hill."

She cocked her head to the side, in an unspoken question, and he sighed once more, ending on a groan. "We'll never be able make it out the house with you dressed like that."

A look of dawning shadowed across her face and she burst into laughter as they pulled into the garage of the warehouse.

"Well then, I'll just have to wear it until it's no longer so sexy."

He blew out a breath and ran his hand through his hair, as if winded. "That's a lot to ask from a man with simple tastes, Harl. You're dynamite in that, and you know how much I love dynamite."

She laughed as the clown opened the back door and Joker lifted her fully into his arms as he stepped out. "Tell the boys to go to the bar or something. Harley and I have a lot to ah, talk about." He said to the lackey without looking at him.

When they finally made it inside their rooms, Harley was shocked to see how her meticulously organized living room was in shambles. "Jay!" she said and looked back at him, with her hands on her hips, looking pissed.

He trembled visibly and grabbed her, pulling her the ground, oblivious to the mess around them. "Fuck, you look even better in that when you're mad."

"Then you better get used to it until you get me a new couch!"

"Anything you want, Harley." he moaned as she pushed him onto his back over the cotton that once filled the couch. She ripped his shit open, buttons flying, and smiled down at him before she kissed him.

"You know I can't be mad at you for long..." she murmered and he smirked.

"You were for a whole week. So make it up to me, doll. I was a lonely man."

Harley smiled slyly and ran her hands down his chest, wiggling down his body to his pants. "I plan on it, Jay."

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Ha! Hope you liked it, see me some feedback, positive or otherwise.

-ciao!