It was a fine day. The birds were singing, the temperature was perfect. However, as beautiful as a day it is, it cannot fix something as terrible as Gaius's boredom. Robin, Lucina, and Chrom had left a month ago to attend something called "Smash", and everyone else was too busy to keep him company. Except for one.
"Hi, Gaius!" it was Henry. "I was just at the store, and I found this awesome board game!" Henry presented the box to Gaius. "Candy Land." Gaius read. "Would you like to play it with me?" Henry asked. The box was filled with colors, with happy characters on the front. It was defiantly a kid's game, but it wasn't like he had anything better to do…
"Alright. I'll play," Gaius said. "Yay!" Henry cheered. He opened the box, and got everything set up. Gaius was the red piece, and Henry was the blue one. "Do you want to go first?" Gaius asked. "Okay!" Henry replied. He picked up a card. "Double Yellow," he announced, moving his piece quite a distance. Gaius took his turn. "Purple," he said, as he moved his piece. The game continued. Gaius and Henry were neck and neck throughout the game. Soon, they were on the last stretch of the board. It was Gaius's turn. He picked up a card. However, this card was very strange. Instead of having the color in which to go to, it had text. "You are our savior." Gaius read aloud from the card. Henry giggled. "Funny joke! What does it actually say?" he asked. "I'm serious! It says 'You are our savior'!" Gaius exclaimed as he showed Henry the card.
For the first time in his life, Henry felt disturbed. He picked up the next card. "Save us." He read. By now the two were hugging each other in fear, just as any cartoon character would do. Gaius picked up the whole deck. "Hey! You're cheating!" Henry scolded. Gaius just ignored him.
"We're under attack."
"We need help."
"Liberate us, savior."
Gaius had never felt so much fear. Was the game Henry bought just some creepy Chinese bootleg? Suddenly, all of the spaces began to light up. Henry screamed. Then, there was a flash just like in every generic self-insert fic and the two were gone.
Gaius awoke to a squeal. He felt something violently shaking him. "OHMERGAWSH, GAIUS! EVERYTHING IS MADE OUT OF CANDY!" It was none other than Henry. Gaius was opened his eyes, and wouldn't you know it. The whole world was made out of candy! There were lollipop trees! There were gumdrop bushes! The water was even Kool-Aid! I get diabetes just thinking about it! Then, Gaius and Henry just lost it. They went ballistic, eating everything they could find. Quicker than you could say, well, anything really, the two had devoured several bushes, a few trees, and even a giant rock candy, well, rock. The two were so sugar high, it was impossible to be still for a millisecond. "Freeze, ruffians!" came a voice. The two turned around. It was a gingerbread man. A walking, talking, gingerbread. Gaius's and Henry's mouths began to water uncontrollably. "You are eating Candy Land's natural resources! We can't afford to lose any more with the war going on!" the gingerbread man scolded. It quickly came to Henry's realization. "Gaius! We're in my board game!" he gleefully cheered. "Can we eat you?" Gaius asked the gingerbread man. "Absolutely not!" the edible man said as he raised his peppermint spear. "Hey, Fred!" came another voice. It was another gingerbread man. He looked at Gaius and Henry. Then, he screamed. "It's the inedible ones! They are the ones prophesized to save Candy Land from the invaders?" "Prophesized since when, George?" Fred asked. "Since last Monday," George replied. "Um, who exactly are your invaders?" Gaius asked. Fred sighed. "I'm afraid we're under attack from a group called ISIS-Qaeda and their evil fascist leader, Robo-Hitler!"
So yeah. This is the first chapter of this crackfic I'm writing. If you like it, leave a comment and tell me what you think, and perhaps constructive criticism to help improve anything needed! :3
