Firefly fanfic

What happened to Jubal Early?

Floating in space, Jubal Early considers, is very difficult to describe. "It's not like you could swim in it 'cause there's nuttin' to push or propel ya." Early talks to himself, as he usually does - but then what else is there to do when you're floating all alone in space with chances of survival so small, you're about as likely to contract a strange virus, which will makes you lay hen's eggs in your suit.

"And it's not like sky diving 'cause the air resistance doesn't stop you from falling and it makes one hell of a din. Not like hanging on a safety wire either, 'cause that puts pressure on whichever parts of the body you're hangin' from." A frown comes over his face as he remembers one hunt when he'd had to dangle himself down through a hole he'd made in a hostel roof to get to his target, but the harness which the black market dealer had sold him was too small, just small enough to make it uncomfortable. He then smiles and recalls blowing the dealer's head off.

He sees a flash at the corner of his vision and turns his head to see what it is.

The flash has almost gone now, and a cold fury has come over Early. "Those pieces of GOSSA have blown up my GORRAMSHIP!" He adds the Firefly crew's names to his list of people to kill - or horribly disfigure. "Jayne, Zoe, Wash, Book, Inara, Kaylee, Simon, Malcolm and especially River. Your asses are mine when I get out of this". 'If I get out of this,' a corner of his mind adds.

He looks around the dark space around him. "So much space! If there is a god, and he made all the planets, then why is there so much space for nothing. Does that seem right to you?" Then remembering he is all alone, he shrugs. "In fact, if god is in everyone then he has a few screws loose, to let a bit of him die."

Then Early makes a decision "Well I've got nutting better to lose. Hey big guy! Why don't you send over a space ship to me and I'll kill any five people for you. Does that sound fair?"

Silence answers him.

"Huh. Looks like you are a shrewder than I thought"

He sees something coming just into view over the top of his visor. He looks up and see a ship. "Or you have a lousier gorram sense of humour than I have ever witnessed"

The Ship that comes toward him is an abomination: big, dark, red splotches all over the hull with big gashes in some areas. The engines flicker bright yellow, then back to the more normal greenish yellow, but that flickering gives Early the impression that it is about to explode. The magnetic grappler is out to take him inside the ship, where even the bravest of men go insane.

"GOSSA, GODDAMN REAVERS!"