A/N: This absurd idea came to me during work. Originally, it was supposed to be Edward discovering the Twilight series, reading them, and subsequently, freaking out when he realizes he has to wait for Breaking Dawn. This story is completely unedited, although I would like a beta. So, if you think this story needs improving, send me your ideas. I love constructive criticism. Not flames. Again... if you'd like to beta my future stories, as there are bound to be some this summer... send me a message.

Summary: One night, while Bella sleeps, Edward does what all humans eventually do at some point in their lives... he googles himself. Imagine the complications when he finds out he is the protagonist in America's most popular book series...

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, or any of its characters or plot lines. Actually, scratch that. I do own Edward. Just don't tell Stephenie... or Bella. I also do not own Wikipedia.

Here it is, people.


Why Do You Think I Never Bet Against Alice?


It was 4:19 am. I glanced over at my bed, where Bella lay sleeping. She hadn't said a word so far, and I had spent the last few hours with her in my arms, matching my breathing with her own. This was one of the last nights we would get to spend together, as Alice insisted the bride and the groom weren't allowed to see each other a week before the wedding. I told her it was ridiculous, and that since we were a decidedly unorthodox couple, we should not have to follow stupid wedding traditions. Anyways, I was sure of the fact that if indeed we were to stick to traditions, we wouldn't be allowed to see each other the night before… but Alice will be Alice. She, of course, knew she was going to win our argument, and I could see that proudly on display in her mind, so I eventually gave up.

Bella turned over, mumbling something incoherent, and I sighed. It had always been frustrating for me, to not know what she was thinking. I almost crawled back into bed with her, but then I remembered there was something I wanted to do first. I sat at my computer in the dark, the Internet browser open to . I stared at the rainbow letters, determined to see what exactly this page had to offer me. Apparently, this was a source of amusement for humans – "googling" their names. I had always wondered what it would be like to see if someone else shared my name… which was entirely possible, since I had been around for quite a while. My curiousity overcame me, and I slowly entered 'Edward Cullen' into the search bar, and dragged my mouse over to hit the search button.

What came next was a complete and total shock. About 1,490,000 results? Of course this was amusing to humans… it made them feel like they were famous. I clicked on the first link, one to a site called Wikipedia, and my jaw dropped to the floor.

"Edward Cullen (born Edward Anthony Masen) is a fictional character in Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series. He is currently featured in the books Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse. He will also appear in the upcoming books, also by Stephenie Meyer, Breaking Dawn and Midnight Sun, the latter of which will be from Edward's point of view."

This couldn't be right. I was a fictional character? No. This had to be a different Edward… Anthony… Masen… Cullen. It had to be. I'm not ficticious, quite obviously. What were these Twilight books, anyways? I decided to make that my next point of interest. I stayed on this 'Wikipedia' site, as it seemed to be capable of providing useful, if not necessarily correct, information. I typed 'Twilight' into the search bar, and if vampires could faint, I'm sure I would have when my eyes scanned the screen in front of me.

There it was, plain as day.

"Twilight is a young adult vampire novel written by author Stephenie Meyer, originally published in hardcover in 2005. It is the first book of the Twilight series, and introduces seventeen-year-old Isabella "Bella" Swan who moves from Phoenix, Arizona to Forks, Washington and finds her life in danger when she falls in love with a vampire, Edward Cullen."

Yep. This was definitely me. And Bella. Wait… Bella. I quickly scanned through the summary the website provided, and broke out into a grin. I would finally be able to know what she was thinking! Or, should I say… had been thinking, as the book only covered the events of last spring. But wait… there was a sequel. And a sequel to that sequel! Were our lives being written as I was searching for them? I had to get my hands on this. Had to. Quickly, I found the Forks Public Library homepage, and searched for the first book. Crap. They had 2 copies, both of which were checked out through next week. Definitely couldn't wait that long. I opened a new window, this time for Barnes and Noble, and searched again. They were completely out of stock. Of all three books. How could this be possible? I needed to know what she was thinking. I had gone so long without that luxury, but simply couldn't ignore it once it was put right in front of my face.

Edward? What's bugging you?

Jasper's thoughts floated up to me from below. I must have been significantly angry to have Jasper take notice… from downstairs.

I raced out the door to find Carlisle.

"Carlisle," I said calmly, "I need to speak with you."

Yes, Edward? Jasper said you were a bit… on edge. What's the matter?

I continued to speak to him out loud. "There's… this… book. Written about me, Bella… our whole family. How is this possible? This… Stephenie Meyer. There is no way she can know our whole life."

Carlisle didn't even look puzzled. In fact, he looked almost like he was… gloating.

"You mean 'Twilight'."

Of course. I've had those books for a couple of years now… can't believe he hasn't noticed.

I just stared. "You… what?

He nodded.

"Why do you think I never bet against Alice?"


Review if you want. I won't make you. It'll just make my day to know whether you liked or didn't like this. No pressure, or anything...


A/N: Based on recent reviews, I've posted a poll. I'm not quite sure how you guys access those, maybe it's in my profile or something. Anyways, if you know what I'm talking about, poll it up! (The poll is asking my lovely readers whether I should continue this story... so go vote, and I'll decide!)