with my help you could find him
And at first it was easy to ignore it.
At first.
The first time Natsu heard and felt this presence was when Igneel left him.
with my help you could find him
And at first it was easy to ignore it.
At first.
But the longer his father was missing the more he could feel this dark pressure inside him.
With every passing day he got closer and closer to giving in.
He was so close to give in.
Accepting the help this voice offered him.
power, power
Accepting it's promised strength.
At the same time he could feel deep inside him that this wasn't something good. It felt dark.
But he was just a kid. A kid whose father just disappeared.
And after being alone for months, one night he was about to give in.
He was alone. And with every passing day this thing inside him screamed at him to use it. To make himself
stronger.
He missed his father so much.
And then some old geezer found him alone in the woods and offered him to join a guild.
That guild slowly but surely made Natsu feel more and more at home. And the voice got quieter.
A small whisper every now and then.
And then after officially joining Fairy Tail and meeting Happy it almost disappeared for a while.
Almost.
Until...
Until.
He lost Lisanna.
After that the whispers came back at full force.
weak, weak, WEAK, WEAK
Whispering how he could have protected his friend. His family.
If he only was
stronger.
To protect the ones he cared about he needed
my strength.
And Natsu knew that it was the truth.
How was he supposed to protect his friends, his family, when he was this
weak.
But he knew that this darkness wasn't what Lisanna would have wanted for him.
He knew, that if he gave in, something would change.
So he tried to blend the voice out when it screamed at him.
That he was
weak,
so weak
Natsu couldn't help but agree.
It had been years since Igneel disappeared and he was still no closer to finding him.
weak
pathetic
And with every passing year it became more unlikely for him to find his father.
you need me
my strength
After Lisanna's death the voice never really disappeared.
It only grew
stronger.
And slowly Natsu learned to live with it.
With the constant reminders of his
weakness
by the dark presence next to his heart.
And then...
He meet his partner one day in Hargeon.
Formed a team with Erza and his rival, who he now considers his brother, Gray.
Meet other dragon slayers.
Protected other guilds.
And all of that made Fairy Tail feel more like home than ever before.
He had so many people he wanted to protect.
With his own power.
what power
His own strength.
what strength
For the most time he could almost ignore it.
Almost.
But it kept screaming
weak, weak, weak
at every battle he lost.
at every person he couldn't protect.
at every person whose tears he couldn't stop.
weak, weak,weak,weak,weak
just what did you achieve in that year
you can't protect her
He had to watch Lucy fight against Brandish, lying on the ground
useless.
It took all of his strength not to let it swallow him whole.
weak
He couldn't move anymore.
He was
so weak
so powerless
Then.
Darkness.
He woke up.
To Lucy's screams.
To his whole body burning up.
Chained to a chair opposite to her.
And he knew that this was it.
He failed to protect her, protect all of them, once again.
failed, failed, failed
All he could feel was this darkness.
weak
He couldn't feel his body anymore.
weakness
His whole being was trying not to be overtaken.
too weak, too weak
Lucy screamed again.
He looked at her tear stained face one last time.
And let the darkness swallow him whole.
Hey :D Hope you liked this little thing I wrote. I was listening to a song yesterday with that line and couldn't help myself but to quickly write something about it!^^
My tumblr is mereadingandstuff if you ever want to scream about stuff with me. I'd love to!
