Severus Snape: Cupid Incarnate
Valentine's Day at Hogwarts: ordinarily, it is just another day with some addle-minded decorations dotted around the castle. But no, Professor Smarmy-swarthy-sickening – Lockheart, that is – deemed today special. Gag. Love appears to be, unfortunately quite literally, in the air.
Even that ugly cat of Ms. Granger's: what was that irritating creature's name again? Crumble? Crankyshit? Crookshrooms? Who cares. Even that horrid-looking animal had managed to involve himself in a torrid love affair involving Ms. Parkinson's fluffy pink slippers (an ungodly pairing, if I've ever seen one). Of course, his advances were wholly unwelcome, and caused Ms. Parkinson faint on seeing her beloved slippers being so completely defiled by the ginger beast. Having been called in to aid her, I was asked to chase the thing away. But I, Severus Snape, do not chase cats like some schoolyard bully. No, I merely transfigured the slippers into a brick, which caused the cat to howl and hiss before sprinting away. Apparently, the rumours regarding his face and a wall are true…
Of course, now the damned cat has begun a new romance: a love affair for the ages - with my. Damn. Slytherin. Towel. We'll see how he likes the towel once I transfigure it into a pair of scissors, primed to slice his bushy little tail off the next time he makes a move.
Day of love, my ass.
A/N: Hello! I hope you've enjoyed reading this short little ficlet as much as I enjoyed writing it. This goes out to Phoenix's Fairy, who gave me the prompts: Crookshanks, Brick, Fluffy pink slippers, Slytherin Towel, and a pair of scissors to write this. I hope I've done them justice! If you enjoyed this, please leave a review :)
