The word was: scared
A/N: I dislike Abigail Whistler immensely. Immensely. But this was one of those things that demanded to be written.
Abigail Whistler is not scared of many things, but being one of the boys means that she's not scared of anything. Which is bullshit because she knows King's scared most of the time and his wisecracks only cover half his ass. Blade, on the other hand, doesn't indulge in those types of feelings: fear, guilt, regret, sorrow, but because Abigail's still a girl, she believes he has them anyway. He's at least half human, and her father's friend so he can't be a complete machine. (15min)
There are two things she won't admit she's scared of. The first one comes from rescuing and knowing King. Though she has balls of titanium, King's balls are at least steel, and anything that makes him sob in nightmares should scare the shit out of anyone. Abigail lies awake at night, not-hearing him whimper and not-seeing him cry. King is one of the boys and not afraid of anything.
She's not scared of being a vampire in the same way she's not scared of dying (because killing herself is the preferable option). She's scared of being a vampire, and surviving.
The second thing she's not scared of is disgustingly sentimental thing, one of the those things that she suspects comes with being a girl. She's not-scared for King. She's not-scared for Zoe, Sommerfield, Hedges and Dex. She's not-scared that one day she'll arrive home find their bodies lying in pools of blood, or worse, that she won't find bodies at all. Abigail knows it isn't really about them. It's the selfish thought that no one will be there for her, and that she'll be alone (again).
There are two things that Abigail is scared of. Together, they've accumulated an impressive collection of nightmares. She's scared, but that's alright. Fearless is not to be devoid of fear,but to carry on despite it.
