Dark Ritual - The One Waiting
About the Dark Ritual from the point of view of my Grey Warden (HNF), who is in love with Alistair (well who wouldn't be?).
"Look, even if I was willing to entertain this idea... and I'm not saying I am... is this really what you want me to do? Are you sure..?"
Forcing back the tears Sari walked over to him. Leaning against the table to steady herself she looked at him, he seemed... afraid. "I love you. I can't lose you, I... I need you to trust me."
"I do trust you." His response came immediately, "If this is what you think is best... I'll do it."
She rolled over in bed. It felt so empty without him there. All she could think of was where he was, who he was with, what he was doing.
"Stop it." She whispered. She was the one who'd told him to do it. This was what was going to save their lives, wasn't it?
She ran her hand over the vacant bed sheets.
When had she become this woman? The one who didn't want to spend a night alone. The one who was increasingly becoming convinced that if he wasn't there she actually wouldn't be able to sleep. The one who'd made the right choice, she was certain of it, but selfishly wanted her secret dreams to be real... well, she'd always been that woman.
In the quiet she felt convinced she could hear them.
Closing her eyes she shook her head, she could hear nothing. Even if it wasn't true she would convince herself it was.
Or had she convinced herself this was the right thing, wrongly.
She sat up abruptly, exhaling sharply. "Enough." She said. She refused to think on this anymore. She would spend the rest of her night reminding herself quite how foolish she was for questioning something she could not change or she would fall asleep. One would be good for her the other would leave her at a disadvantage.
Falling back against the pillow she sighed. Forcing her eyes shut she hoped sleep would claim her yet all she could think was quite how stupid she really was.
Straightening her shoulder pads she walked down the corridor in Redcliffe Castle. She was waiting for Arl Eamon to tell her they were ready. It was time. Time to end this, one way or another. Well, it would be as soon as he emerged.
She was oblivious to all around her; her mind was focused on Denerim and what they would face there. She couldn't help her thoughts slipping back to Alistair.
"Are you sure..?" He seemed... afraid.
She had to find him. Would he even want to see her? After what she forced him to do? Could things ever be the same between them?
"Sari," A voice called her.
She blinked and looked up, Zevran was stood before her.
"Are you alright? You seem a little... preoccupied."
She blinked again and frowned, "What?"
"My point exactly. Is there something wrong? Other than we go to Denerim to fight the Archdemon, obviously."
"I, um... Yes I'm preoccupied. I'm sorry."
"It is no problem. Until the Darkspawn skewer you on their blades of course. But I have promised you I'll try to stop that from happening." He smiled.
The corner of her mouth turned but no smile materialised.
"That is not what is troubling you."
"Hmm?" She frowned, what had he said? "Have you seen Alistair?"
"Ah, I see. Yes. As a matter of fact, you passed him in the corridor."
She span round, it was empty.
"I think he called you but he left when you ignored him."
Oh no. "Where did he go?"
"I'm not sure I remember, but I'm sure something could remind me..." He smirked.
"Zev." Her face hardened, "Where did he go?"
"Alright, alright. He took the door on the left. I assume he went outside. Why? What has happened between you two to make you so... preoccupied?"
"I have to go to him." She whispered without responding to his question, "Thanks Zev." She called as she ran pushing the door to the outside open as she did so.
There he was, standing looking out over the village. Her heart lurched at the sight of him, she felt so ashamed. All the determination she'd had when she'd run out of the door failed her. "Alistair." Her voice almost a whisper. Clearing her throat she tried again," Alistair."
He turned. Was that fear on his face?
Tears reached her eyes. If they were going to be parted anyway why should they be parted by what was meant to save them? She pushed herself into a run and flung her arms around him with such force he almost fell over. Steadying himself he grasped her tightly.
"I love you." She told him, "I love you, don't ever forget it and don't you dare ever doubt it." She traced the outline of his face with her finger as tears streamed down her face, "Nothing will change how I feel about you. My heart is yours."
"What did I do to deserve you?" He whispered.
"You just had to be you."
I've kind of just left it there. I kind of wanted to write more. But I'm also happy with this 'sweet' ending.
Please review.