More Than Just Cadavers
Summary: One shot. Molly is a very skilled mortician, who can slice up more than just bodies. In lieu of autumn, Molly celebrates with some festive spirit by carving pumpkins with her assistant. When Sherlock walks into the morgue, he's very surprised to see what she's done.
"Morning, Molls!" said John walking into the morgue. He saw Molly bent over a workstation running some samples.
"Morning, John," she replied. Looking up she smiled, but then furrowed her brow in confusion. John was carrying a bright orange pumpkin. "What's that for?" Molly asked, pointing at the pumpkin.
"Well, it's for you, Molly. I know it's autumn, and I'd thought I'd bring you a little piece of it since, y'know, you work down here where you can't see it," he said placing the pumpkin on a table."
"Wouldn't it just rot along with all the other things down here?" she said.
John froze at the morbid question, but realised it was only a joke.
"Oh, jeez, sorry." Molly smacked her forehead with the palm of her hand.
"No, no. It's fine," John said with a small, reassuring smile. "Jokes are certainly not your strong suit," he said with a small laugh.
Molly smiled, "Thank you for the pumpkin, John. I really appreciate it." She then picked it up. "I'll put it in my office."
"Oh, no problem, Molls. I'll see you later."
"Bye, John!" she said as he left. She then walked out the mortuary doors, down the hall, and into her office. Molly slid some paperwork over to make way for her pumpkin, which was just a little larger than a football. After adjusting the pumpkin on the edge of her desk, she went back to the morgue to finish up her samples.
d(^_^)b
A couple hours laters, Molly was finished with the samples. Surprisingly, she had't had to do a single autopsy today, at least not yet. Just then, Mike came in.
"Molly, hello."
"Hello, Mike, what brings you here? Did you bring me any bodies?"
"Uh, no, but about that. I was wondering if you could let Declan Martin, your assistant, take over doing your autopsies for the next week or so. I've got an important project for you to do, and only you are able to do it."
"Yeah? Sure, Mike. What is it?"
"Well, it's not going to be pleasant, but I need you to re-file everything and put the files on the computes."
"What?!" asked Molly in astonishment. "That's going to take more than a week, maybe three."
Mike hesitated, knowing Molly wouldn't be able to do her autopsies. "I know this comes as a disappointment, and a tedious one at that, to you, but it must be done. A new hospital code has been passed and it requires every department, including yours to re-file documents and put them into computer databanks. We can't have the parts of files on paper and parts on computers anymore."
"Aww, Mike. Can't Declan help me?"
"No, Molly. Someone needs to do the autopsies, since Clyde is on holiday. Furthermore, you were the one who organised all of the files, so you'd know how to re-file all of them. Also, think of Declan. You know he won't be your assistant forever. He'll one day be where you are."
"Right. I'll get right to then."
"Sorry, Molly, I know this isn't as fun as cadavers for you, but thank you for doing this for me," he said. With that he left.
"Oh boy," Molly said under her breath. "Declan?!" she called out in the morgue. She'd have to relay Mike's information and relinquish her job to Declan for the next few weeks.
d(^_^)b
One week in, Molly was already bored out of her mind. She had spent so many hours filing, so many hours typing, so many hours staring at her computer. Her eyes were tired from the strain. She was afraid that if she didn't slice something up soon, her fine motor skills would fail her. She needed to excersise her skills, but she knew that she couldn't get back to doing post-mortems until the filing was complete.
Molly leaned back in her office chair to rest her eyes for a bit. She didn't want to leave her office for a break, because that would just prolong the filing process, meaning she couldn't get back to what she wanted to do. Molly placed her feet on her desk, leaned back, and shut her eyes. She enjoyed the moment of relaxation, but only for a few seconds.
"Molly! There you are. Why aren't you in the morgue?" abruptly asked a familiar voice.
She didn't even open her eyes. "I also have an office. What is it that you want, Sherlock?"
"Why aren't you doing autopsies? Declan is insufferable to work with."
"Some could say the same thing about you, you know?"
"Molly, he isn't as skilled as you are. He looks past everything and his attention to detail is abominable."
Molly finally opens her eyes. "Sherlock, I have to re-file documents and put them into databanks. If you care to let me get back to work, the sooner I'll be back in the morgue."
"But you were trying to sleep just now!" said Sherlock with his nose wrinkled.
"Yes, trying. I'm tired, Sherlock. I'm bored. Believe me, I don't want to be here any more than you. Come back in a few days, when I'll be in the morgue. I'll at least have the documents in my office finished."
"You mean, you have more documents in the morgue?"
"Of course I do, I can't walk to my office every time I need to pull a file," she said placing her head on her desk. "Just put up with Declan if you need to see bodies.
Sherlock sighs. "Fine, Molly, but do hurry–" he stopped. "Why do you have a pumpkin in your office?"
"John brought it for me, as a gift. He said it's a piece of autumn."
"That is ridiculous. It's just going to decay on your desk."
"That's what I told him, but more morbidly. Anyway Sherlock, I've got itchy surgeon's hands and I must get back to work before I go insane."
"Right. I will be back, Molly, and I hope to not see Declan again," he said walking out the door."
"Mmm. Yeah, bye, Sherlock," said Molly, with her head still on the desk. She was so tired of the filing and paperwork. She then glanced up at her pumpkin. She then had an idea to relieve her boredom.
d(^_^)b
A few says later, just like she said, she had finished all of the files in her office. She moved onto the many filing cabinets in the morgue down the hall. Now that she was in the morgue, she could at least see what Declan was doing with the bodies and observe.
The filing was tedious, so on her breaks, she had a great way to relieve her boredom. Molly had taken John's pumpkin into the morgue and placed it on the slab. Since it was her break, it was also Declan's break. The lab was empty, which was perfect for her to perform an autopsy on the poor pumpkin.
"Right, you ready mister?" she asked the pumpkin, grabbing a large knife. The pumpkin's skin was much thicker than that of a human's, so he would have to carve into the pumpkin. Molly started with the top, the pumpkin's cranium. Skillfully, held the knife just right and she cut a circle in the top, making the cap of the pumpkin.
Once she removed the top, she saw the innards of the pumpkin: a messy, orange web of slimy goo and seeds. It was like a monster's vomit, if such a thing existed. Molly then grabbed a metal bowl and a large spoon. Molly began to scrape and scoop out the entrails into the bowl. The pumpkin had a musky, dank, odor to it, but it surprisingly still smelled fresh. Pumpkins were peculiar squashes.
After Molly had finished scrapping the inside, she tried to decide what she would carve into the side. She thought of something brilliant. Her carving would take a lot of work, but Molly loves it. So she went over and picked up a smaller knife. "Okay, this is going to be a delicate procedure, so don't fuss when it stings," she said to the pumpkin.
Several minutes later, Molly was finished with her work of art. She then realised that she didn't have any candles to place inside of it, so she cut a hole in the bottom the pumpkin and placed it over a bunsen burner to illuminate it. It was perfect.
Just then, the doors of the morgue swung open. It was Declan.
"Hey there Molly– Whoa, Molly? What's this?" he said pointing at the illuminated masterpiece. He saw a bright pumpkin over a bunsen burner. Carved on its side was the human heart. He could see where she carved the aorta, both venae cavae, the septum, and all of the valves. The intricate detail was incredible and looked like it came straight from an art contest.
"It's just a little something I did on my break," Molly replied with a hint a modesty.
"It's incredible. You seriously did all of that during your break?"
"Yup!" she said, placing emphasis on the 'p' to make a popping noise.
"Mind if I snap a photo of it? This is absolutely exquisite," he said pulling out his mobile.
"Sure, Declan."
"Is pumpkin carving a hobby of yours?"
"Eh, no. I just did this on a whim, but I did carve a few pumpkins with my dad when I was a kid."
"You really must have itchy surgeon's hands to do all of this," he said leaning against the table, looking into the light being emitted from the pumpkin. "Honestly, I'm getting tired of doing all the autopsies by myself. I enjoy it, but not as much as you do. I just wish I could take a break from it."
"If only Mike would let us switch places. I think we both need a release, Declan. All of this paperwork might take another week to finish."
"Mmhmm," he said with a yawn. "Say, where did you get a pumpkin?"
"A friend of mine got it for me."
"Hmm, I have an idea, Molly. What if we both carved pumpkins for our release? I enjoy recreational surgery on things other than cadavers."
Molly laughed at such a morbid statement. "Oh, Declan. Don't make jokes, because they're certainly not in your area."
He gave her playful slap on the shoulder. "As if your jokes are any better."
She smiled, "Sure, I thinking pumpkin carving would be a great idea. I can cut something up and you get to take a break from autopsies.
d(^_^)b
Over the next few days, both Molly and Declan would bring pumpkins into the morgue. Each time they would receive a break, they would carve one pumpkin each. Eventually, they made it into a contest of who could do a better design or who could finish the quickest. Using pumpkin carving as their release turned out to be beneficial for both Molly and Declan. Molly dissecting the orange squash was almost as much fun as dissection cadavers. Declan was just happy to do something enjoyable, even as small as carving designs into a pumpkin.
"Molly, I think my pumpkin better represents the pancreas than yours does."
"No way. Just because it's the right shape doesn't mean it's better. Mine has more detail."
"Whatever man. What shall we do next? Spleen, liver, or gallbladder?" asked Declan.
"Hmm. Spleen, but after that, I want to do the lungs. I bet I could carve better alveoli than you!"
"Psht. Girl, prepare to eat pumpkin guts when you lose," he teased.
As both of them began to carve more pumpkins, they had eventually filled the morgue with orange representations of human anatomy.
d(^_^)b
"Stamford, where is Molly?" asked the detective.
"Sherlock, mate! Is she not in her office? I've not check in on her for about two weeks because of a project I have her working on."
"She's obviously not in her office, otherwise I wouldn't be asking you where she is."
"Let me think. Well, she might be out for lunch, or she could be in the morgue. I believe documents are in there as well."
"Right. Later Stamford," said Sherlock leaving Mike's office. He strode down the hall to the mortuary, but before he entered, he could hear laughter. It was Molly's laughter. It was strange to hear her laugh. What would cause her to laugh in the morgue? She couldn't possibly be doing an autopsy and finding it humorous. Then again, she might have lost her mind.
Sherlock entered the morgue, only to find himself completely bemused. He looked around and saw pumpkins everywhere; they were on shelves, on gurneys, the workbenches, tables, stools, and in the hands of two pathologists. Sherlock looked over and saw Molly, whom hadn't noticed him yet, laughing at the pumpkin. It apparently had a skull carved into it and Molly evidently was pretending to be Shakespeare.
Molly then looked over to see a catatonic Sherlock.
"Sherlock! Look at what I've done! Er, I mean what Declan and I've done!" she exclaimed waving at him to come over.
Sherlock slowly walked forward, speechless. He wasn't sure how to respond to something so ridiculous, yet so interesting.
"Um, Molly... I uh," he paused, wrinkling his nose. "Have you finished your filing?"
"Oh yeah! I finished that a couple days ago. I must've forgotten to text you."
He looked around the room again. "I can see the reason. Conducting experiments, Molly?"
"In a way, but it was just to keep us from getting so bored. Anyway, why are you here?"
"I came to see body, a Mr. Leonard Fisher," he said.
"Oh yeah! I did him earlier this mo," said Declan. "I put him in the fridge, come on."
All of them went over to the wall of fridges. Declan opened the respected fridge, but only to find things that didn't belong.
"Wait, I thought it was this one? Molly, did you put these here?"
"I did, so that's why Fisher's body is in the third one from the right."
"Right, okay," he said with a laugh.
d(^_^)b
At the end of the day, Declan had left for home and Sherlock had finished his business. However, he stayed behind with Molly.
"So, you put John's pumpkin to good use I see."
"Do you like my carving?"
"I find it quite good. You do have an excellent hand in carving, although I'm confused as to why you didn't ask me to join you. Pumpkin carving is certainly creative and enjoyable, Molly."
"Sorry, Sherlock. I hadn't meant for the pumpkin carving to get out of hand, it was just to pass the time. If you want, we can carve some. It's just I couldn't do it here. Mike is coming into the lab on Friday, and I'd have to clean up the lab."
"Well, I do believe John has some pumpkins back at Baker Street. Care to join me?"
"Molly gave a big smile. "Yes, I'd love to."
The End.