Yet another spin off as Same as it Never Was, possibly one of the best and most shocking eps of the new cartoon series. Well, pre Fast Forward and Back to the Sewer. I'm not all together sure I should be posting this. It's something I've been working on for five years and even after five years I haven't gotten that far – school, work and a new born don't allow much time for writing. But it's been a while since I've done anything fanfic related and I want back in. So here it is. Give me some feedback and let me know if you guys are liking what you're seeing. I sure hope ya do!!

Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT, if I did…well, Raph would be in a hell of a lot of trouble! Lol. I just take liberties with their characters as I please. Considering the outcome, they don't have much room for griping about it. All OC's that will appear later on in the fic are mine however.

Chapter One

"Don, why do you have to do this?"

The turtle in question resisted the strong urge to yank at the ends of his bandana and shot his older brother a weak glare, then turned back to his computer. There was no way he was going to explain his decision yet again. How the hell many ways was there to say, "I need to do this so I can sleep at night"?

"Come on Donnie. I know what you went through was pretty disturbing, but you've got to get over it," Leonardo persisted.

Okay, so apparently he would have to explain it again. Man, he was seriously getting sick of this. Pushing away from the desk, Donatello stood and turned to face his brother. "Pretty disturbing? It was a damn nightmare Leo! Why can't you just be as understanding as Raph and Mikey were?"

"Yeah Leo, lay off the guy, would ya?" Raph called from the couch where he, Michelangelo and Casey were watching pro wresting.

"Thanks Raph." Donnie sighed and shook his head. "I know you're worried Leo, but that's not going to stop me, okay? You weren't there. You didn't have to watch your brothers all get killed in the span of ten minutes. You didn't stand-." Donnie paused to cast an apprehensive glance at the occupants of the couch and lowered his voice. "You didn't stand over Splinters grave listening to a way too hardened Mikey telling you how he was killed. Not how he died Leo…how he was killed. It's hard to deal with the knowledge that there's a reality out there like that. Especially when you know there's a way you can fix it."

"That's just it though," Leo argued, "you don't know! What if you get stuck there? What if we can't get you back?"

Donatello bit back another sigh of exasperation. "I wouldn't have given the idea a second thought if I didn't think it could be done. Leo…look." Taking a hold of his brothers arm, he turned him so that they were both looking over the cavernous lair that had become their home. It was clean now: the floor swept, all books, weapons and various inventions to alleviate boredom put away. The beat-up coffee table in the living room was cleared, a miracle in itself, but looked well on its way to being cluttered again. Their two brothers, Michelangelo and Raphael were in a heated discussion over which wrestler had made the better commissioner. So far it sounded like the credit was going to Mick Foley.

"Could you deal with the fact that in some other reality this was destroyed? That our brothers were dead? That we all pretty much abandoned Mikey?" Don asked, then went on to tell Leo the one thing he'd kept to himself. He was desperate to make Leo understand. "When I saw you and Raph there, you guys were two seconds away from killing each other. If you thought you had a chance to change that, wouldn't you take it?"

Leo stared straight ahead, silent. Finally, he said, "Couldn't you take one of us with you?"

"No." Donnie shook his head sadly. "You, Mike and Raph all exist in that reality. I…don't."

"What about Splinter?"

"He wouldn't want to see what's happened to you guys and that's way too much of a shock-bringing back a Sensei they all believe to be dead."

"Jesus Don, I really don't like this."

Donnie placed a hand on Leo's shoulder. He could feel his older brothers resolve crumbling. "Leatherhead and April are helping me with this. They know what to do if it works and they know what to do if something goes wrong. Just calm down and trust me, okay?"

"I do trust you Don. You're the smartest guy I know." Leo faced him, his gaze troubled. "I just don't want whatever happened in that reality to happen here."

Donnie watched him walk off and tried not to feel guilty. He was doing the right thing. He was going to make a big change in one world that he could never make in this one. He was going to help his family. And he was going to stop having nightmares about something that could never be.

*~*~*~*~*~*

"So you've got the right coordinates…but you're unsure of the date?" April asked uncertainly, looking over a detailed layout of the program Donatello had been working on for weeks, her green eyes scanning every little detail.

A few feet away, studying an open door frame that was made entirely from metal and looked as if it would be much more at home in the Triceriton galaxy than in a cramped corner of the lair, Donnie looked back at April. "Yeah. Back when all of the craziness with the Triceriton's and the Republic was going on, I was able to steal a few programs from the computer system. Nothing really serious, but it helped. Unfortunately, none of the programs gave much information on a time leap this big and those that did were pretty vague. I think between the three of us though, we were able to figure it out." Donnie walked over to April and clicked to a separate screen on the computer, explaining to her how the machine would work. "The coordinates were relatively easy to obtain. The year and time, however, wasn't. Doesn't really help that whatever I was told wasn't that specific. A couple of years…about thirty. I set it for three years a head from today's date so hopefully it will only be off by one or two."

"And you're sure you want to do this?"

The look Donnie gave April said it all. Yes, he wanted to do this, yes he was aware that something could go really wrong but he was tired of people asking and wished they would stop.

April held her hands up in front of her with a weak smile. "Okay, sorry I asked." Tucking a strand of bright red hair behind her ear, she turned back to the screen, her eyes taking in all numbers, every miniscule detail. She couldn't help but think that Donnie was a complete genius. If he was human and there was no Casey to be somewhat involved with…and maybe if he was just a little older…She grinned ruefully. That was a dangerous train of thought to be following. But, he really was brilliant.

"All is finished here, Donatello." A large mutated crocodile in a white lab coat came around the open doorway, studying the device critically from behind a pair of thin, wire rimmed glasses. "There seems to be not much else we can do but attempt to use it and pray that all goes well."

"Thanks Leatherhead. I'm glad you helped me out with this. As always, it's been a pleasure working with you," Donnie said, holding out a hand.

Leatherhead grasped it, smiling warily. "I worry for you, my friend. But I also know you would not risk such a journey if you were uncertain of the results." Releasing his friend's hand, Leatherhead reached into the breast pocket of his lab coat and withdrew a small remote. "The portal device is designed to create a time pocket upon your arrival in this other reality. It will remain dormant until you activate it with this and can only be activated once, so do not use it until you're certain you want to return. The portal will remain open for a matter of minutes; then it and the time pocket will disappear."

Donnie took the remote and stared at it. It was hard to believe that something so small was in control of whether or not he made it back home. Doubt started to nag at him. It had before, but never with this much persistence. He almost wanted to give in, to say screw it and stay where he knew his family was alive and together. Before he could change his mind, he walked over to where his bag lay on the floor several feet away and tucked the remote in one of the inner pockets. Several other things were packed in there. Disks filled with important information, a digital camcorder April insisted he try using (although he probably wouldn't) a few of his own inventions he thought might help, and now the remote. There wasn't much else for him to do but grab his bo staff and go.

Pushing his doubt to the far recess of his mind, Donnie pulled the zipper shut, stood and slung the bag over his shoulder. When he turned, his brothers were waiting for him along with Splinter. "Well," he stated hesitantly, "guess I should probably get this over with."

Michelangelo approached him first, giving him a hug and slapping his back extra hard. "Have a fun trip Donnie. Tell future me I say hi."

Donnie smiled and nodded, but wouldn't promise anything. The future Mikey was nowhere near as carefree and optimistic as this one was. Donnie wasn't sure he'd appreciate being told that the younger version of him with body and family intact said hi.

Raphael was next. He tossed Donnie his bo with a smirk, clapped a hand on his shoulder and said, "Later brianiac." That was it. Never let it be said that Raph was one for long goodbyes. But his abruptness made Donnie feel better. At least one of his brothers seemed to have faith that he was going to be coming back.

Donnie moved on to Leo and Splinter, half dreading what his oldest brother would say. He already knew how Splinter felt. His sensei, after hearing a detailed account of what had happened in the dimension Donatello had been sent to, had only hesitated for a moment when the purple-masked turtle had told him he wanted to make things better. Out of all of his family, Splinter had been the most understanding.

Leonardo surprised him though. No lecture, no asking once again if Donatello was sure about this. There was a tentative look, but then Leonardo hugged his younger brother tightly. "Just hurry back, okay? We need ya here Donnie," he murmured.

"I will Leo. I promise."

Donatello stepped away from his bother and gave him a brave smile. "I'll be back before you even get a chance to miss me."

"Doubtful."

Turning away from Leonardo, the younger turtle shared a quick goodbye with Splinter and finally faced the portal. "Go for it, April," he instructed, not looking back. If he did, he might want to stay. And if he stayed, so did the nightmares.

There was a long pause, followed by the click-clack of April's fingers striking the keys. Then there was a low, electrical hum. Energy filled the lair, waves upon waves of it and it was all flowing towards the same place-that gaping doorway.

Donnie watched as volts of blue pulsated around the doorway, collecting and slithering over the metal like snakes. Soon, they covered the frame, emanating a blinding neon blue. The humming became louder, almost deafening. A sudden crack echoed through the lair and everything fell silent.

The portal was open, a swirling vortex of blues and greens that twisted slowly. A gentle wind, hardly noticeable, spilled from the opening. It brushed Donatello's feet and he swallowed hard. Man, he sure hoped this worked.

"Dude, that was kind of awesome," he heard Michelangelo say.

"Don…" That was Leo, forming another protest.

It went unheeded because before he could get much further than that one syllable, Donatello squared his shoulders and walked into the portal, leaving his world and his family behind.