Disclaimer: What's up with these?

OH YEA BABY IT'S HAPPENING! This is my first one-shot/story on fanfiction, and I'm so excited, I could just…freakin'…kill a guy.

Kendall scooped another spoonful of Fruit Loops into his mouth, reading over his text messages.

Hey Kendall, we still on for that date later? Love ya!

-Jo

Logan, meet me in our room at 12! You said you wouldn't be late!

-Carlos

Sorry Kendall, I accidentally sent that message to you.

-Carlos

Chuckling, Kendall put his phone back into his back pocket. There was NEVER a typical morning in apartment 2J, and now Kendall was curious about what Logan and Carlos were going to do at 12. Shrugging it off, he took his phone back out and replied to Jo's text.

Yep! Can't wait, love you!

-Kendall

"Hey Kendall, have you seen Carlos anywhere?" Logan asks, walking through the front door.

"Yea, he's in you guys's room, and you're late for whatever's happening at 12" he answers, and Logan's eyes widen.

"Haha, yea thanks" he says, and hurries off. "Oh Logan!" Kendall talks, making the short brunette turn towards him.

"What's happening at 12 exactly?" He asks, and Logan sighs. "Well, yesterday Carlos told me about his secret, and-"

"Logan! Get in here!" Carlos shouts, and Logan mouths the word 'Sorry' and walks into his room. Kendall laughs and rolls his eyes. After finishing off his cereal, he puts his bowl in the sink, and walks over to the couch. Kendall never really liked the color of the bright orange couch. He kind of preferred the color yellow, or purple, because those were the colors on his hockey-

"Carlos why are you in the closet?"

Kendall's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Logan's voice, talking to Carlos. He sat up, and looked towards his friend's bedroom door.

"What's going on in there?" Kendall asked himself.

'In the closet, who was in the closet?' he though. The blonde looked at the door for a few seconds, before rising off the couch, and walked a few feet, so he was standing in front of it.

He leaned his ear up against the piece of cool wood, and listened to their whole conversation. "Okay, Logie. Put this on" Carlos said.

Logan eyeballed the outfit Carlos was showing him, and looked Carlos in the eye. "Why on earth do you want me to wear that?" he asks.

"Because! It'll get me in the mood, now just put it on, please Logie?"

On the outside of the door, Kendall gasped. 'What 'mood' is Carlos trying to get into?"

"Carlos, I said I'd be happy to do this with you, but you're making it a pain in the butt" Logan says, and Carlos giggles.

Kendall takes out his phone, sending a text to James.

DUDE, get up to the apartment, ASAP!

-Kendall

It takes a few minutes before he gets a reply.

On my way up now.

-James

Putting away his phone, Kendall continued to listen. The things he was hearing were indescribable, and Kendall was in pure shock. He was wondering why they never told him or James, why they wouldn't tell each other a secret that was so HUGE.

Kendall covered his mouth, as he heard a loud moan coming from the other side. Then James walked in. "Hey buddy, you said you needed me?"

Signaling him to be quiet, Kendall motioned James to come sit next to him. "Listen to this, and tell me what you think is going on in there" Kendall tells James, and he puts his ear up against the door.

"Oh yea, that's good" the 2 boys heard Carlos say, right after another moan. James raised an eyebrow, and looked at the door like it was some kind of Alien.

"What the heck is goin' on in there?" he whispers into Kendall's ear., and he shrugs.

"I don't know, but earlier, I heard Logan say Carlos was in the closet, and Carlos wanted Logan to put on some kind of outfit to get him in the 'mood'".

James didn't know how to react, so he just asked "What else?"

"Logan said he was happy to do it, but Carlos was gonna make it a pain in the butt. A pain in the butt, James!"

Kendall and James stared at themselves, then back at the door for a good 3 minutes. Every now and then there was a soft moan, coming from Carlos and Logan.

James snickered, and Kendall looked at him, his face expression saying 'Why!'

"Who would've thought it would be Carlos and Logan? Didn't you at least thing it would be Carlos and me, or you and me, or Logan and you? Only if we were 'In the closet' that is" James says, and Kendall laughs quietly. "Okay, that's true, but, but we aren't…we aren't…In the closet".

"Logan! Harder!" Carlos's cry was hear clear throughout the entire apartment. James's eyes nearly popped out of his head, and Kendall just smirked.

"Do you have it?" Logan asks, who sounded tired and worn out. Carlos nodded and pulled the package out.

"Does he have what?" James and Kendall shrugged. "I have a feeling it's a-" Kendall didn't know how to put it, so he just kept quiet.

"Do it slow, okay?" Logan tells Carlos, in which he nods. Kendall and James tried to stifle their laughter. It was kind of funny to listen to Carlos and Logan.

After a few more minutes of awkward moaning, Kendall and James heard a choking sound.

"Carlos! You can't just shove that In my mouth!" Logan shouts. "Doesn't it taste good, Logan?"

Logan shrugs before nodding. "I guess," he says, earning a disappointing look from Carlos. "It's fine dude, this is new to me, and I just need to get use to it"

"It's gonna take some getting use to alright!" James says, and Kendall laughs, punching him playfully in the shoulder.

James and Kendall sat there for another 30 minutes, entertained listening to their best friends.

"Ahhhhhhh!" Carlos's scream actually hurt Kendall's ear. "It's okay! It's okay!" Logan says to him. A few more silent minutes went by, until they heard Carlos's voice again.

"Oh, that's good! More, more!" Kendall and James couldn't take I anymore, they were dying to see what Logan and Carlos were doing.

Kendall looked at James, who had sort of a dreamy look in his eyes. "You okay?" Kendall asks him, and he nods.

"I was thinking, instead of listening, how about we go join them?"

With his jaw dropped, He looked at James horrified. "Are you kidding me?" he asks, and James shakes his head. "You know I'm not, Kendall. Even though we don't play for the other team, we should at least give it shot" Standing up, Jams knocked on the door.

"Okay, I guess you're right" Kendall Agrees, standing up as well. "Who is it?" Logan calls.

"H-Hey Logan and Carlos, um, we know what you're doing in there-"

"You do?" Carlos asks. He sounded scared, and helpless, and that made Kendall and James…attracted?

"Yea, we do. And we were wondering, if we could join?" James asks, shutting his eyes tight. There was a moment of silence, before Logan said "Sure, come on in".

James and Kendall high-five each other, before taking of their shirts and walking into the room. "I hope Katie and mom don't find out about-"

"Why don't you guys have any shirts on?" Carlos asks, similar to a puppy, if puppies could talk. "For you guys" James answers, and Logan raises an eyebrow.

"Why? Why on earth would we need that?" he asks. "Because you said we could-" Kendall stops talking, when he finally realizes what Logan is wearing.

"Why are you in a chef's costume?" he asks, and Logan sighs.

"Carlos said it would help him get in the mood" James smiles at them before he and Kendall take off their pants.

"Whoa! What are you doing!" Carlos shouts, covering his eyes. Kendall hops in the bed. "We're gonna help you guys with Carlos's little problem"

"Okay, great. Carlos was really wearing me out. You can help by putting your clothes back on, and cutting those tomatoes over there" Logan points to a small wooden table with a whole bunch of vegetables on it, and a large pot in the middle of it.

"Tomatoes?" James asks. "What exactly were you guys doing in here?" Kendall asks, voice rising ever so slightly. "Carlos told me yesterday that he was sad that he missed the annual sauce off , back in Minnosota, so he asked if I could help him make some here and I said yes,but I'm starting to regret it" Logan explains.

"Sauce, really?"

"Yea, what did you think-…Wow you guys are such perverts" Logan says, tapping the knife against the table. By now James and Kendall were getting re-dressed, and Carlos was laughing like hyena at what they though. "Me, and Logan! You've got to be kidding!" he cries, clutching his stomach.

"Well it's not our fault! You guys sure made it sound like you were doing something in here!" James defends them.

"Yea, I mean what 'mood' were you trying to get in Carlos?" Kendall asks. "My cooking mood. I can't cook when I don't feel like it" he says.

"But why did you scream out like that?" James asks, and Carlos shows him his bandaged thumb. "I cut it with the knife"

"And why did you say 'Oh yea, more, more!' James imitates, making Logan laugh. "Because Logan sprayed it with some medical spray or something. At first it hurt, but then it felt really good".

"But, Logan said you were in the closet! Is it true? Are you? Are you playing for the other team, are you-"

"I was in the closet because I was trying to find the chef's outfit" Carlos interrupts. "Well, what did you shove into Logan's mouth, huh? Explain that!"

Carlos walks over to the table and holds up a bag of beef jerky. Every year me, my mom, and my papi always put beef jerky in our sauce to give it the extra flavor!" he says, and eats a strip of it. "Yea, and I don't really like beef jerky" Logan tells the two.

"Oh, well I guess that explains everything" James says, turning to Kendall. He nods, and stares at his feet awkwardly.

"Are you guys gonna help us or what?" Carlos asks, and they nod and make their way over to the table.

So, nothing was going on here. And Logan and Carlos just need to wok on how they respond to each other. I hope you didn't think that they were doing something completely different in there, like Kendall and James. Speaking of the two eavesdroppers, did they feel the slightest bit guilty about what they thought, though?

The answer to that question is no, because there was never a typical morning in apartment 2J

Hope you liked it! I thought it was pretty funny, and I was totally inspired by 'Fish Stick Friday'

So, now I will be writing my next one-shot called 'Big Time Reality'.

So, um a cookie right in front of me..I have to go now.

I feel guilty, because I'm just leaving but-yea bye!

Yum yum yum!