The Hotpocket Hunter: Hello! This is the Hotpocket Hunter and The Accomplice's combined account. We are currently on my hand-me-down couch, surrounded by candy wrappers-
The Accomplice: and random leaflets of paper! Waiting for Hotpocket to make me a corn-dog so I may be rather random for a few moments. The Rulebook is my baby, but our minds have twisted its rules into everyday events of the Black Order. So we bring to you the Black Order Insanity! Our combined insanity...
The Hotpocket Hunter: My parents just tried and failed to explain the logic of adding a minute per corndog to the microwave. Oh well, and least me and Accomplice will be fed. We're also taking turns wrestling my male Siamese ^^' Yeah, we're messed up. Whatever. Anyway, check out our other accounts if you like anything here or even just our writing style. These are going to be combined fics. With BIZARRE Author's notes.
Enjoy, mortals!
This is the intended beginning of Black Order Insanity, written by the Hotpocket Hunter and a lot of sugar. It is an account of the cause and result of each of The Accomplice's DGM rules. We're both writing these,
1. Do not make Allen mad.
a) We need him.
b) He is the Destroyer of Time.
c) Calling him Noah-chan is likely to annoy him at best, enrage him and cause him to release the 14th at worst.
This should have been fairly obvious, but some Exorcists and Finders had apparently picked up Lavi's habit of calling Allen "His dear, sweet, Noah-chan." The only reason Lavi could get away with this was because Kanda had first dibs on ending his existence.
The cause of rule #1.
Allen let out a blood-chilling cackle as he fiddled with something on the table. Even Kanda edged away from him. The past two hours had marked the occurrence of Black Allen's longest appearance, and no one was eager to ask why the demon was out and about.
Apparently, Lenalee didn't get the message. As she walked into the cafeteria, she glanced around, brow furrowing slightly at the crowd of people watching Allen with morbid fascination. Getting her food, she set the tray down beside Kanda before going to greet Allen, not noticing all the scientists hand-signalling her to stop.
"Hi Allen!"
No response.
"Allen?" Lenalee was concerned now. "Are you alright? What are you doing?"
Another demonic laugh answered her as a dark aura surrounded the white-haired exorcist.
"Eep!" she scooted back, eyes wide.
Turning to Kanda, she asked, "Kanda, what's wrong with Allen?"
Reever sighed. "So you haven't met Black Allen before?"
"Black... Allen?"
"Tch." Kanda's emotionless face didn't match the way he gave the younger male a wide berth. "The moyashi's off his rocker. His dark side is making an appearance."
Lenalee looked very worried. "But... He's okay, right?"
Reever nodded. "In a way, yes. I'm a lot more worried about whoever brought this on. They're in for some serious trouble."
"What do you mean?" asked Lenalee.
"One of the guys mentioned d-e-b-t-s around Allen," Reever spelled out. "It was worse than a Komurin incident, because there was no one to kick him in the head."
Lenalee eyed Allen warily as she sat down to eat. "Well, it doesn't seem to be any of us, so I guess we shouldn't worry to much, right?"
Reever nodded. "As long as we stay out of his way, we'll be fine. He's a lot more focused when he rampages than Kanda."
Kanda growled, but made no comment.
Johnny came up to them, grinning. "Anyway, I can't wait to see who he's after! I want to get it on film, I'm making a horror movie for Friday nights in the lab."
Reever crossed his heart. "I can't help but feel sorry for the poor soul."
Lavi looked around, humming absently. "I wonder where everyone is..." Shrugging, he headed to the cafeteria.
He stepped inside, and froze.
Allen's head snapped up instantly, eyes lit with the fires of hell. "Hello, Lavi."
There was something incredibly creepy about the greeting, and Lavi shuddered, instincts telling him to run. Being Lavi, he ignored them. "Hello, my dear, sweet Noah-chan!"
Allen chuckled a perfect, demonic, Black-Allen-with-5-aces-up-his-sleeve laugh. "About that..." He held up a weapon.
Is that paper mache?
"I don't like that nickname!" Allen's voice rose from a whisper to a shriek, and he dove at Lavi.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Lavi screamed, running as fast as his little rabbit legs could take him. Allen followed in close pursuit, still laughing.
Kanda snorted. "Baka Usagi."
Reever looked at him. "Would you like me to ask him what he thinks about you calling him Moyashi?"
"No, thank you," answered Kanda quickly.
Johnny cheered. "We finally found something that scares Kanda! Yes! This is fantastic! Think of the blackmail!"
Kanda disappeared quickly after it became clear that Johnny was being affected in a very diabolical way by his hero's sudden defection to unholy evil. Who knew the Moyashi could inspire a cult with a mere split-personality?
Out in the hall, Lavi's screams suddenly cut off.
All the science division crossed their hearts and prayed for Lavi.