Kitana: Mwahahahaha!!! thunder booms in the background and lightning flashes
Kida: What the heck do you think you're doing?
Kitana: Beginning another useless story of course!!! Mwahahahahaha!!! more thunder and lightning
Kida: And the point of that would be…?
Kitana: Because if people don't review this one, I'll have an excuse to destroy the world!!!
Kida: You're nuts… oh man… O.o I guess I have no choice but to stop you then…
Kitana: You can't stop me!!! I'm invincible – well, at least in this story I am…
Kida: gets a saucepan out of nowhere and knocks Kitana over the head There we go, all better now. Now, we'd better do a disclaimer.
Kitana: dizzy Kitana and Kida don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! But we do have a heck of a lot of Duel Monster cards – IN YOUR FACE YUGI!!!!
Kida: sigh Do I need to get the saucepan again?
Kitana: No! clutches head
Kida: Well in that case, let's get this story started!
Kitana: Okay!
Both of them: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
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Chapter One
Recruiting the Thief King
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Ryou Bakura was walking home at an unusually slow pace. It was the end of a Friday afternoon – which meant no school. He sighed. Ever since the end of Battle City, life had been moving fairly slowly, with Ryou caught in the midst of it all.
He turned a corner. His house was in sight.
Suddenly, there was a clap of thunder. Ryou looked up, surprise etched upon his face. The sun was still shining brightly. What was going on? Had that really been thunder? Or was he just imagining things? Anyway, it didn't really matter. He just had to focus on getting home.
Ryou unlocked the front door and froze. He could hear voices.
He tiptoed towards the living room. Yes, they were definitely coming from in there.
He pressed his ear to the door. He could just about understand what was being said.
"Hey! That's an illegal move! You CAN'T activate 'Monster Reborn' on that guy because he can't be Special Summoned!"
"Whatever, I wasn't going to get him, I was going to take your precious Dragon!"
"Well, you can't take him either!"
"And why not MAY I ASK?!"
"Because he's mine you jerk!"
Ryou stepped away from the door and shook his head. This was insane! The burglars who had broken into his house were playing Duel Monsters! He could tell that there were two individuals in the room – one voice had been low and controlled whereas the other voice had been high-pitched and kind of squeaky. It didn't matter – even if they were playing Duel Monsters, he had to call the police.
Suddenly, the door burst open. Two girls were standing there, deck boxes in their hands.
Kitana: Okay, this is where WE take over! Whoever was doing the commentary can leave now, we don't need you!
Commentator Dude: Fine! sniffs and walks off annoyed Have it your way!
Ryou: Who on earth are you two?!
Kitana and Kida: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Ryou: turns into Bakura That doesn't answer the question…foolish mortals!
Kitana: frowns Prepare for trouble!
Kida: Make it – oh no, stop there, otherwise we'll have to add it to the disclaimer!
Kitana: slaps a hand to her forehead Whoops!
Bakura: I STILL DON'T KNOW JUST WHO THE HECK YOU ARE!
Kida: I am Kida Loon, the champion of cards and justice! On behalf of all Loons, I will right wrongs and triumph over bakas and that means you! points at Kitana
Kitana: Hey, no fair! I'm supposed to be on your side! And wait, weren't you the one giving me lectures on disclaimers?
(Bakura meanwhile has sneaked off and has grabbed a knife from the kitchen. It is very pointy)
Bakura: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Kitana and Kida: look at each other His evil laugh outdid ours! Now we really must punish him!
Bakura: comes back from kitchen Foolish mortals, you can't defeat me! And what exactly is your name?! points the knife at Kitana
Kitana: sees how very pointy it is Yikes! faints
Kida: sigh Oh all right then, I guess I owe you a proper explanation.
Bakura: nods
Kida: We are two insane girls who live in England. We've come to Japan in search of your assistance, for a great task lies ahead of us.
Bakura: And that would be…?
Kida: We're going to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!
Bakura: Sounds like fun grins But what makes you think that I'd actually help you out? And for that matter, what do you want me to do?
Kida: Well, really, you've got the freaky ability to bring cards to life, and that can be really useful for World Domination!
Kitana: sits up and looks like a zombie doing so And then we're going to destroy the world. Mwahahaha!!!
Kida and Bakura exchange glances: Nah.
Kitana: looking tearful And why not?
Bakura: Because if we blow up the world, we'll be taking ourselves along with it!
Kida: nods And it's better just to go for takeover – cause then we don't die!
Kitana: Oh, okay then, I guess that's a good enough reason…
Bakura: whispers to Kida Just how dumb is she?
Kida: Incredibly stupid.
Bakura: Figures.
Kitana: Lalalalalalalalalala… we're gonna take over the world… lalalalala……
Bakura: But first –
Kida and Kitana: look at Bakura
Bakura: - we need a plan of action!
Kitana: jumps to her feet I've got the perfect idea! All we need to do is kidnap Seto Kaiba and Joey Wheeler!!
Bakura: Why Wheeler?
Kida: So he can get in the way of course!
Bakura: whines But I want THIS plan to work!!
Kitana and Kida: Tough!!
Bakura: We also need the Pharaoh's Puzzle.
Kitana: Yeah, but we can come to that bit later.
Kida: And one thing's for sure, we won't leave it up to you to get the Puzzle.
Bakura: Which 'you'?
Kida: Both of you!
Bakura: angrily And why not?
Kida: looks at Bakura Because you do tons of illegal moves and always end up getting sent to the Shadow Realm, and you're looks at Kitana just too dumb to be allowed.
Bakura: Then who's going to beat the Pharaoh?
Kida: An associate.
Kitana: shrugs Fair enough. If…
Bakura: If what?
Kitana: IF I GET TO BE THE ONE WHO KIDNAPS SETO!!!
Kida: Fine, just don't mess up.
Bakura: Who made you the leader of this team anyway?
Kida: towers over him menacingly Do you dare question me?
Bakura: holds up the very pointy knife
Kida: sees how very pointy it is Yikes! faints
Kitana: gets a jug of water from the kitchen and throws it over Kida
Kida: gets up
Bakura: So while you're kidnapping Kaiba and you're looks at Kida dealing with Wheeler, what am I supposed to do?
Kitana: Get Marik of course!
Bakura: narrows eyes Why do we need him? For that matter, why do we need Kaiba?
Kitana: For his technology!
Kida: Duh.
Bakura: Remind me why I'm helping you two foolish mortals.
Kitana: Erm… cause… I've got all of Exodia!
Bakura: YOU WHAT???!!!
Kitana: Yep, and I'll give all the pieces to you if we succeed in our demented yet very feasible plan!
Bakura: Deal.
Kida: Why DO we need Marik?
Kitana: So we can read his back and find out how to drain the Pharaoh of all his powers!
Bakura: I like this plan.
Kida: We also need Marik so that his Rare Hunters can rob Shadi.
Bakura: Him? What are we going to take from him?
Kida: The Scales of Justice and the Millennium Key!
Kitana: Okay, in that case, let's go and gather our team!!! We'll regroup in an hour!!
Bakura: raises eyebrow It's only going to take you an hour to kidnap Kaiba?
Kitana: I have my ways….
All three: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
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Danny: We don't own Sailor Moon or Pokemon.
Julia: Why the heck weren't the rest of us in this chapter?
Kitana: 'Cos it's dumb to introduce five Original Characters at once.
Kida: Yep, you guys just have to wait.
Kirika: Whatever, just tune in next time and make sure you review!
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