Bramtana Week, Day 6- Missing Moments: Season 2

Title: Thanks For Kicking My Ass in the Right Direction

Spoilers: none really, takes place around 2x16

Word Count: 3,391/ T

Summary: "Sorry Trouty. I gots to get my girl"

Disclaimer : I own none of these characters or glee.

A/N: Shout out to my beta, Demiroar on Tumblr for taking the time to help edit a few times.

Santana was sitting at a far corner of the choir room. Anyone who looked at her would assume she was just observing the group practice from a distance and not lost in her own thoughts and daydreams, but she was. Her head was certainly not in the number they were supposed to be rehearsing. Instead, she was focused on the beautiful, carefree blond dancing thoughtlessly around the classroom. Those graceful moves always seemed to capture and hold Santana's attention, but lately the choir room was the only place she could even witness them. It had been weeks since she had last spoken to Brittany and Santana was growing exceedingly hopeless and angry, but at the same time sad and empty. She would do anything to have her best friend back, even if that was all she could get. All those movie nights where they'd stay up late to just talk began filling her mind. Most ended in pillow fights in Brittany's room where Artie probably now enjoyed all his time, stealing every second away from Santana. But she wasn't allowed to be jealous, she had her chances and she was stupid enough to waste them. An all too familiar laugh brought her back to the present. Artie had Brittany on his lap and was giving her a ride around the room. They rode past Santana and Brittany offered her a small smile .

A warm feeling instantly spread over her at the thought that Britt, for the first time in days, had looked at her the way she did before when their frienship wasn't a mess of feelings and denials. The good feeling was gone as soon as it started as Santana remembered why their relationship had begun to suffer in the first place. She had gotten so caught up in her thoughts about Brittany that she was startled to find Sam staring intently at her from his seat with an unreadable gaze. He nodded towards the door, indicating for her to follow him outside. Deciding she had better leave anyway before her inner Snix hurt the geek on wheels, Santana got up and the two stepped out.

They stood in the empty hallway for a few silent moments facing each other, Santana wondered what the guppy-lipped boy could want from her. He was always around her lately, although that could probably have something to do with the fact that they were somewhat dating or whatever.

Sam had his arms crossed and was surveying the girl in front of him. He cleared his throat and started tentatively, "You know I'm sure if you talked to Britt, you guys could work things out ."

She didn't know what she expected to hear but this was far from it. What's he talking about, he couldn't, he didn't possibly, Santana's thoughts were all over the place. "What?"

"I see the way you look at her in glee club. And you guys barely talk anymore." He answered. They locked eyes. Where was he going with this? "You love her, don't you?" Oh. That's where. Santana mentally kicked herself for getting herself into this situation thanks to her inability to keep her eyes from constantly wandering over to Brittany . Nevertheless, Sam's was a sincere question, no teasing undertone , no disgusted disapproval. Although they have been dating for a few weeks, their conversations never reached a too deep or personal level but they had formed a unique type of a bond that must be inevitable when becoming used to someone's presence. There was a long silence as she weighed her options. She could lie, and get away with it too, but if her feelings were already that obvious she saw no point in denying anything, Sam would just badger her with more questions. Before she knew what she was doing Santana was nodding, silently wondering who else knew?

"And you're...are you.." he stopped there, not wanting to push a very vulnerable looking Santana. She was fidgeting with her fingers, looking everywhere BUT at him. It was strange for Sam to see her so out of her zone when she was usually ranting a mile a minute about something Rachel said or criticizing Mr. Schue's vest obsession. Something told him his goofy impressions weren't going to be enough to cheer her up this time.

Wanting to say something useful, he spoke up. "Santana, y'know, I realize maybe we aren't the ideal couple. You're always yelling names at me and I admit you kind of scare me but we kinda work in some weird way. I care about you, and if there's anything you wanna talk about maybe, when you're ready, I'll be here to listen, no judging. Promise."

Santana wasn't one for emotional conversations, let alone emotions themselves, but something about the honesty and care lacing Sam's voice had almost caused tears to spring to her eyes. She wanted to think that it was because ever since Berry's little party, her feelings had been all over the place but in reality, she was just caught completely by surprise. It was a rare moment for someone to kindly reach out to her, and she gets that it's because of her Lima Heights bitch persona. But it's nice when someone just sees through all of that, it's one of the thing's she's loved about him. Granted, Sam was all kinds of dork, he was always busting out into random accents and characters but Santana kept him around because whether she liked to admit it or not, he kept her laughing and distracted most of the time and he knew to take her bitchiness lightly. To some extent, he could always see through that facade of hers. He wasn't Brittany, but he was more of a friend than she could have ever hoped for However, she didn't plan on opening up that easily.

"I'm fine, Sam. Though I can't say the same for those salamander lips of yours. Seriously, I think they've grown a few sizes since this morning. Were you trying to stretch them over your head again?" She says, trying to regain her composure.

"Hey, that was one time! And because you dared me to! Anyway, San, cut the bull. I'm trying to have an actual conversation with you. I know you're not fine. You mope around glee club, you barely want to make out and when you do, you never look at me afterwards. You're not fine, so talk to me. " He was fed up with her excuses and distance. She was Santana Lopez, a hard ass, yes, but he knew something was up with her and he couldn't ignore his inner desire to want to help.

Santana was running out of reasons to not talk to Sam. She knew he was trustworthy and had a good heart, but letting people in was new to her. Still, if she didn't speak to someone about her inner turmoil there wouldn't be enough Berry's in the world on which to release her rage. Hesitantly, she uncrossed her arms, let out a deep sigh and spoke, "I just, I don't know how to do this. It's always been me and Britt, I barely function right without her. Ever since she's been with McCripple Pants we barely even talk anymore. And then when we do it's about feelings and shit, you know I'm not good at that stuff."

Sam laughs, "Oh, I know. Remember when you thought I told you I love you ? I still have a scar on my nose from that punch-"

"It was a reflex! You should fix that damn pronounciation problem of yours. Can't let those Jay-z lips take the blame all the time "

"-but wait, you haven't told Britt how you feel?" Sam asked her.

"I did. And then I took it back. I know she loves me, but she's with Artie and she won't leave him, she's too good. But, I can't help but feel she chose Wheels over me. " San added softly so that Sam had to lean in closer to listen. Well that explains the death glares she's been sending Artie, he thought to himself. "And now I have to see them everywhere I go and when we're in glee club. It fucking SUCKS . Why can't she just leave him and be with me?" Santana asked dejectedly, her voice breaking a little towards the end.

They were sitting against the lockers now, looking straight ahead, Santana with her legs crossed, staring at her hands. She was thinking of how, before, she and Britt used to go over each other's houses after school to catch Sweet Valley High and cuddle on the couch until one of them fell asleep. It had been too long since their last marathon. Sam had his knees pulled up to his chest, his eyebrows furrowed as he absorbed everything his girlfriend had just told him. He couldn't say he was too upset by the confession, though he did feel a little used. Then again, it's not like he expected to stay with the girl forever. He felt for Santana. Loving someone and seeing them on a daily basis in someone else's arms had to hurt; must be one of the reasons she was always acting so tough. Sam still recalls when he and Santana were at Breadstix and the waitress messed up their order, he would never forget the wrath the girl unleashed on the entire staff. He had never heard all those spanish curses used at once, accompanied by so much hand flailing it looked like there was a kung fu match going on . Not a single one of the waiters were there the next time they returned, all quit. Not even Santana could believe it, she seemed slightly embarrassed . In those small moments, Sam could sometimes sense there was a goodness within her somewhere but that fire is what he loved about the fierce brunette, and that's what she needed to hold onto.

Making up his mind, Sam abruptly stood up, startling the girl beside him. "Alright, get up." He looked down at her and stretched out his hands to help her up. Santana gave him a confused look but he just gazed into those dark eyes determinedly, "Listen, the Santana Lopez I know wouldn't just let someone take her girl. The Santana Lopez I know, would kick anyone's ass if they ever tried to take something she wanted; she wouldn't let anything get in her way. 'Oh no, Ima go ALL Lima Heights on your asses', " Sam said, complete with a Z-formation snap in an attempt to be the intimidating brunette. "Where's that Santana? Do I need to take out a missing person's report?" At this impression Santana cracked a smile, which made Sam smile too. It was what he'd hoped to achieve. "Now I want you to stop the pity party, you hear me? You're going to fight for Brittany, because from what you say, she was yours first. And you don't just let the love of your life get away, or in this case roll away, with someone else. I'm not saying to steal her back, but...you need to at least speak to her."

At Sam's words, Santana could feel a new kind of determination unfurl within her. Brittany was hers and only hers and there was no way in hell she was going to let Artie take away someone she'd fought so hard against herself for. Thinking back on it, she screwed up by trying to take back everything she told Brittany in front of their lockers that day. Santana needed to show her that she did want to work towards a day when they'd be together and public, that she would fight for this and nothing was going to change that .

She would start by rebuilding their friendship first.

In all her new found feelings, Santana reached up and embraced Sam in a bone crushing hug. "You're not so bad sometimes, Trouty mouth." Sam laughed and pressed a kiss to Santana's forehead.

"I know you love me, I know you care" he jumped into song and dance in a perfect Justin Bieber impersonation that had Santana shaking with laughter.

"Okay, okay. You need to not do that" she managed to say between breaths. When Sam had finally gotten rid of his Bieber fever, he gave Santana one more hug and they walked back to the choir room, both sporting large grins on their faces, happy they could fully enjoy their friendship now that they had a little bonding session.

"Hey so, does this mean we're broken up now or..?" Sam questioned.

"Sorry, Trouty. But I gots to get my girl . It's been a good run. Oh! But if anyone asks, I broke up with YOU". He chuckled at this, because he expected nothing less.

[~~~]

When they reached the choir room, everyone had gone except for Brittany who was in her seat looking at something on her phone. When Sam and Santana walked in to collect their stuff, she looked up. For a minute the three just looked at each other. The two girls had gotten so used to tiptoeing around each other , they didn't know how start a regular conversation with each other. An awkward silence threatened to settle around them but was interrupted by the sound of skidding wheels. Artie was at the door, "Ready to go, babe? He asked with a cheesy grin while adjusting his fingerless gloves .

Santana seemed like she was about say something, she was gripping her book harder than necessary, Sam noticed. Sensing this was about to be a ruined opportunity, or a possible wrestling match, he stepped in, "Hey, Artie you got a minute? I just got this new uh, set of comics I want you to check out" Sam begins to roll Artie out of the room with litte time for an answer, giving Santana a quick wink and thumbs up as he headed out . If she weren't all for the ladies, she would swear she loved that kid. Turning her attention back to her blonde, she again felt the slight tension in the room. Get your shit together, Lopez. You guys have been friends for years, a little separation shouldn't make you so damn awkward. The little pep talk Sam gave her was still coursing through her; it was now or never.

Brittany was staring at the blank screen on her phone, but was focused on the girl nearing her. They hadn't been alone together in weeks, and she didn't know how to act. She knows that staying with Artie was the right thing to do but it had affected her friendship with Santana more than she would've liked. And could have possibly ruined anything else they might have been. She missed her bestfriend but it came to a point where all they were doing was hurting each other. They needed space. Of course that just meant that whenever she saw Santana her heartrate went though the roof, and an electric feeling that reached down to her toes momentarily left her speechless .

"Hey Britt"

"Hey, S" Jesus, that smile still never fails to make me weak at the knees, Santana thought as she racked her mind for something to say next that wouldn't make the girl leave . "Okay, I'm not doing this", She wanted to cut to the chase, she was through with missing those bright eyes and debilitating smile. She moved to sit next to Brittany who by now had put her phone away and was staring at Santana with expectant eyes.

"Britt, I miss you."

"I miss you, San"

They spoke at the same time but the message had gotten through to both of them. The awkwardness that hung in the air dissipated in seconds; gone was the doubt that plagued their minds. Taking advantage of this knowledge, Santana tried to spill everything that was on her mind.

" Britt, I meant everything I said that day. I don't want to be with anyone but you. But I don't want us to stop speaking just because you're with Artie and I'm afraid of showing my feelings for you."

" San, it's okay. I mean, its not okay but, I get it. I'm just trying to give you space so you can figure out what you really want."

"I know what I want, I want you. And you want to stay with Artie." Santana was trying to keep her voice calm, her feelings at bay. Any angry outbursts and this could go totally south.

Brittany felt the air start to change around them, this conversation was on dangerous grounds and she didn't want to take one step forward and three steps back anymore. She stood up and knelt in front of Santana, taking her hands and looking up at her face. "Hear me out, San. I love you, you know I do. I love so much. I'm not staying with Artie because I love him more, it has never been a competition because you'd win, always . But it wouldn't be fair to him, to break up with him, I do care for him. You're still afraid. I'm here for you every step of the way, I don't want to push you. I want you to reach a place where you feel comfortable with yourself, with who you are. For yourself."

All Brittany had wanted at first was a duet partner, and Santana pushed her to Artie. She wanted feelings and honesty, and Santana pushed her away rather than admit her actual feelings. Now here she was, doing just that and she was again pushing her towards Artie? Except, this time Santana was beginning to understand. She wasn't ready to be with Brittany, out and proud, which is what Brittany deserved and more. She needed to work on herself so that she could truly give the girl she loved everything she was. The more she thought things over, the more sense it started to make. And as much as she hated it, Artie and Britt were staying together. But not for long if she sorted herself out. Not all hope was lost, Britt still loved her.

Santana couldn't think of anything to do but hug Brittany tightly. Putting her arms around her neck, she inhaled the familiar scent of vanilla and held her close. When they finally parted, both could sense that a big part of their friendship was already mended. It was always so easy to fall back into their usual cadence.

"I'm so lucky to have you " she whispered, linking their pinkies together.

Brittany looked down at their hands and smiled, "Yea, me too. This means we're friends again, right?"

" Best friends. Though this doesn't mean I'm totally okay with you and McCripples. I'll be keeping an eye on him. And you and I are gonna have a sleepover at LEAST once a week. But nothing wanky!" she added that last part with a laugh as she saw Brittany's eyebrows go up in suspicion. They walked out into the hall together in search for Sam and Artie. Santana was so happy to have her best friend; she owed Sam big time. For being there for her and kicking her ass in the right direction, but mostly for being the goofy guppy-lipped boy he was.