A/N: Originally came from DA... Only very minor edits was added just so it fits being a fanfic poem. I just really want to post it here, since it reminds me so much of the selfless, I-will-protect-Gon-at-all-costs Killua... You've been forewarned, this is a deathfic...
I don't know at what setting to put this... just as long as I know that Killua did his best to protect Gon... at all costs.
All I wanted
was my best friend.
He was the only one
who stayed with me
who cared for me
who actually thought
that I mattered.
He said that
to him,
I was
important.
He didn't know
how much more
important
he was
to me.
He showed me
that there was a world
other than this hatred
and fear
and anger
that curled up tight in a ball
inside my cold, dark
heart.
He told me that there
was definitely a tomorrow.
He told me
he could see it;
the bright yellow sunshine
and the clear blue skies
shining above us
as we walk down the road of our lives.
He doesn't know
that I couldn't
and wouldn't have
seen it
if he wasn't there.
He made me see
a new kind of light.
He was like
my midnight sun.
All I wanted
was my best friend.
All I wanted
was for him to be safe.
All I wanted
was to be
a normal
boy.
I wanted
my past
to be
erased
before my eyes.
I wanted it all
to disappear.
To crumble
into tiny dusts
blown
by the wind.
I wanted the pain
to disappear.
I wanted his pain
to disappear.
I would be able to endure.
It was me, after all.
Anything.
anything for my best friend.
I don't know
how he'll go through this.
I don't know
how the pain will come.
What pain will come
would be beyond me.
But he doesn't
and will never know
the pain that swelled in my chest
that came with
the regrets
with the broken promises
as he called my name one last time.
"KILLUA!"
The oblivion swallowed me whole
and tore
my future
my dreams
and
my life
into pieces
as I heard his voice one last time.
Calling my name.
Telling me no.
Saying we wouldn't give up.
Crying.
Asking me.
Why I broke the promise.
Why, indeed?
I ask myself.
Why bother
when I can still stand up
and fight.
When there's still
a chance
to survive.
Because everyone has to make a sacrifice.
And he paid
the consequences
for the sacrifices
I had to make
for him.
In the end
was it actually
worth it?
DISCLAIMER: Yoshihiro Togashi owns HxH. I, however, own the poem.