You Ran Into the Night From All You Had
Walking out into the dark
Cutting out a different path
Led by your beating heart
-"Laura Palmer" by Bastille
Sybil was sitting at her desk, looking over the note to her family one last time when Anna entered her bedroom. "Oh, Anna, I'm afraid I'm not feeling well."
"Should I call for Dr. Clarkson?"
Sybil was quick to answer her, "No, it's not that bad. She touched the note. "As soon as I finish this I think I'll go straight to bed. You can go to Edith and tell her I won't be going down for dinner."
"Yes milady."
Anna turned to leave but then she heard Sybil softly say, "I...I hope they will forgive me." She was still looking at the note.
Her solemnness surprised Anna. "Of course they will, they're your family. Are you sure you don't want me to do anything for you?"
Sybil tore her eyes away from the note, looked back at Anna, and in her more usual, pleasant tone said, "Yes. Goodnight Anna."
"Goodnight milady and feel better."
Once the door had closed it was as if the starting gun had gone off. Sybil took a deep breath, folded the note, put it in the envelope, and placed it on the mantle. She put on her hat and coat before retrieving her suitcase, which she had packed the night before after she finally returned from the garage in a flurry of excitement. From her window she watched dinner guests arrive; she had to wait until everyone was in the drawing room before she could make her way out. Her gaze swept over the room, looking for any last minute items of importance to bring. It was hard to tell though; it depended on whether or not she would be allowed back. Should she be practical and pack more jewelry to pawn for money or be sentimental and pack more photographs?
Sybil shook the imaginary scenarios of the aftermath out of her mind. She had to actually get married first. Her heart lifted, married to Tom. Tom, who was waiting for her, always waiting for her, and she must not keep him waiting any longer. It was time for her to follow her heart and go out into the night.
Tom was leaning against the Renault with his hands in his pockets when she entered the garage. When he saw her, Tom jumped forward, his face lighting up. "You're here."
"I am." She was ready. She was ready to leave her old life behind and start a new one, with him. Sybil put down her suitcase so that she could greet Tom with an embrace without hitting him with it when she flung her arms around his neck.
Tom pulled away in order to kiss her forehead before he went to retrieve her suitcase. He picked it up. "And you haven't changed your mind, you're coming with me." It was a statement, but there was room for disbelief.
Sybil stopped him as he walked by with a hand on his wrist and assured him, "I have not. I am marrying you, Tom Branson."
Her declaration earned her another light kiss, to which she quirked an eyebrow and asked him, "Are you going to kiss me after every sentence I say?"
He loaded her suitcase and with a smug look on his face said, "If I can."
This time, it was Sybil who closed the distance between them and kissed him. "How's that for an answer?"
Sybil expected him to keep the game going and kiss her. She wanted him to kiss her. She closed her eyes in anticipation as he leaned in and could feel his breath on her, but not his lips. She opened her eyes and in a low voice he said, "As much as I am enjoying this, I think we should get on the road, don't you?"
Sybil inhaled and nodded in agreement as he walked away. Then, Tom stepped up into the car and as if he were a conductor said, "All aboard for Gretna Green!" Tom then looked down at her, put on that charming smile of his, and held out his hand. "Ticket, please."
Like countless times before, she took his hand and got into the car, but this time she sat in the front seat and he was not in his livery because he is no longer her chauffeur, but her fiancé.
Their smiles went away though the second the car started moving and did not return until they were a safe distance away from the house.
"How do you like sitting in the front?"
"It's wonderful, the view is much better up here, I can actually look at your face instead of the back of your head." They both laughed and Tom turned his head to briefly meet her eyes. She raised her hand to touch the hair above his collar and continued, "I could recognize you in a crowd just by seeing the back of your head."
Tom smiled again and then adjusted his grip on the steering wheel as he turned his gaze back to the road. "That, ah, reminds me...I was thinking, since we should be far away enough from Downton that people won't recognize us, well you really, and we both skipped dinner but it's not too late yet, maybe we can stop at a pub for dinner. I could court you properly, even if it's just this once." He looked to her for her answer.
"I'd love that."
They stopped at a pub they spotted on the road that they deemed to be far away enough to not fear being recognized and once their feet were on the ground, Tom held out his arm for her to take. "Shall we?"
Sybil felt renewed excitement bubbling within her as she wound her arm around his. Upon entering they saw a few other groups of people, mainly just having drinks, who glanced at the two of them but quickly turned their attention back to their own conversations. We're just like any other couple.
Towards the end of their meal, Tom asked, "Do you like this?" He tilted his head around to indicate the whole place.
"I do, I think when we're in Ireland we will have to go out to a pub once a week or so, if only to spare us from my cooking."
Tom chuckled. "Hey now, I heard Mrs. Patmore say you weren't too bad back when you were finishing up your lessons." He paused and looked straight into Sybil's eyes, "You should know that I made up my mind to ask you to marry me watching you bake that cake for your mother."
Sybil looked down and reexamined the memory in her head before gasping. "That's right, you were there!" She looked back up at him. "I thought it was odd how much tea you were having."
Tom smiled softly. "I needed an excuse to be there."
"But what was so special about that moment, why did you make your decision then?"
Tom took a calming breath and reached out over the table to take her hand. "Because I saw how capable you were, how you were willing to learn, and it made me realize that it could work, that we could work."
Sybil squeezed his hand. "Oh Tom, you have such faith in me. I shudder to think what I would be doing if you had not entered my life, so boldly I should add." Really, the nerve of him when he gave her those pamphlets, when he proposed, when he asked her to run away with him, so many opportunities for her to say no and have him fired. Yet years later, here they were.
If she had not left with him tonight, she would be having dinner with her family, watching Mary try so hard to look pleased about all the talk of weddings. Aren't we all stuck with the choices we make? But marrying Tom Branson is a choice she is going to be perfectly happy being "stuck" with for the rest of her life.
"Did you hear about Ethel?"
Tom was thrown off by the change of subject. "Eh, only that she had been at the house, why, did something happen?"
"She walked into our luncheon...with her baby."
"Her baby?"
"By one of the soldiers who convalesced at Downton before he died when he returned to the war, so she claims. The man's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Bryant, were visiting."
"That would better explain her leaving; she must have been caught with him. It was very sudden and hush hush." Tom clarified.
"So you think she's telling the truth? Mr. Bryant didn't think she was. He said she was trying to trick them into giving her money."
"Ethel had ambitions, but she's not conniving, and I don't think she'd go through all that trouble to trick someone."
Sybil nodded in agreement, "I don't think she's lying." They turned her away though. They were the ones who could best help her out, the only family she could turn to, and they turned her away. Even if it was not true, they would not help a woman and her baby.
Aren't we all stuck with the choices we make?
Her own family might turn her away for marrying the man she loves but they do not approve of. For going behind their backs because she was too afraid to face them and give them the chance to say no. What if something happens and she needs their help? Will she be strong enough to ask for it then and even stronger if they refused? Would it have been better to give them the opportunity to make their choice? Would it take away these feelings of guilt and doubt that were creeping up on her?
"Why don't we get back on the road?" Tom asked.
Sybil looked into Tom's beautiful blue-green eyes. She loves him and she is going to marry him. That is all that matters because the rest is detail, right? She smiled at him in agreement. Yes, she needed the fresh air, to be in motion, because sitting still had allowed her mind to wander into dangerous territory.
Back in the car, Sybil sat right against Tom, having felt far more relaxed with him than when they first started their journey but also because she wanted to be close to him, to assure herself of her choice.
A/N: This is an early birthday present for yankeecountess, hope you like it!