Ok, this is a totally stupid crack fic that my sis and me are writing. The character Mitsuki is a character I designed. Also, when my sis and I wrote this, we wrote it in the form of a play, so I am changing it into a real story! This is tough for me so enjoy or I will eat your guts. XD Just kidding!! Oh, and FYI the characters are very OOC!! And to all you son-of –a-bitch flamers out there, if you don't like it, don't fuckin' read it! I don't wanna have to hear you complain about it because you're just mad 'cause you have no sense of humor!!!

Chapter 1-Meet Mitsuki

Luffy walked onto the ship one day with someone new.

"Ok everyone, this is the new member. Her name is Mitsuki and," Luffy was cut off by Sanji.

"OH MY GOD! Look at them boobs! She gotta be like a triple-D cup or something!" Sanji then exploded into one if his big 'love rants' as we call them.

"Oh eww! That's just not right!" Mitsuki yelled. Dammit, how did he know? She thought. Suddenly her gaze drifted to Zoro. "Like, oh my god! Who's that total hunky swordsman?" She exclaimed, hearts filling her eyes.

"Oh, that's Zoro-kun. He's my first-mate and,"Luffy lost her attention. She ran over to Zoro and gave him a fangirl glomp.

"WTF! How come you get the pretty new girl? Zoro, you lucky basterd!" Sanji yelled angrily at Zoro.

"What? I'm not-it's not like-GAAHH!!!" Zoro yelled spastically.

Nami and Robin had heard the conversation and walked in, giggling.

"Well Sanji, if your going to be chasing her, then I guess you won't bother me then will you?" Nami asked.

Sanji smiled at her, "Oh, no Nami-chan, I still love you and Robin-chan!"

Damn, well it was worth a shot anyway… Nami thought to herself. "Oh well! Sanji make me some food!" She demanded.

"Yes my darling!" Sanji ran off in his usual, goofy way.

"Hey, Nami-san." Mitsuki whispered. "Do you want Sanji-san to leave you alone?" She asked. "Well…even if it hurts me?

"Um…I guess?" Nami sort have questioned her.

"Alright…here goes." Mitsuki readied herself for what she was about to do.

Sanji wandered in, "Oh Nami-chan! It's ready!" He said.

Mitsuki dashed up to him and gave him a big kiss, right on the lips. She turned around, leaving Sanji surprised, yet happy. "God…she's a good kisser…" He sighed.

"I told you it'd hurt me. But, I'll be fine! I like helping friends!" Mitsuki smiled.

Nami stood speechless, "Well you really didn't have to go to such extremes…" She said quietly.

"Anyway…Mitsuki-chan killed Crocodile, he looks something like this now!" Luffy held up a picture of a stick figure with a scar in a pool of blood.

"I drew that!" Mitsuki exclaimed happily.

"Oh my god, she's such a good artist!" Sanji smiled.

"…It's just a stick figure in a pool of blood!" Zoro yelled.

Before anyone could respond, Usopp, the most hated of the crew, ran in.

"Ha, ha, ha! I finally did it!! I'm a genius! I invented a way to make ice cream out of birdseed and gum!! He yelled.

"EEWWW!!!!!!!!" everyone except Luffy yelled.

"That sounds awesome!" Yelled Luffy.

"Oh, that's just disgusting! Where I come from we make ice cream out of…well whatever they make it out of. At least it tastes better then that!!" Mitsuki yelled.

There was an odd silence.

"I love bananas!!!" Yelled Mitsuki.

-End Chapter 1-

Crocodile was the big bad guy in the Alabasta arc.

So, how was it? I plan to write many more chapters of this, so please tell me how good you thought it was. Please review!