Where the Heart Lies
A shorter (ish?) love story about our two favorite grayhairs that recounts through flashbacks some of the significant events that shaped Henry and Betty Reagan's lives together from their arrival in Bay Ridge, to the secrets kept over the loss of their firstborn son, Peter Christopher, to the birth of Francis Xavier, Mary's introduction to the family and finally at the end as they face Betty's illness and passing together. Warning: this one's a real tear-jerker at times!
Originally slated to be a Snapshot II, it was necessary to let this one stand alone since it's grown to a 22-chapter full-length installment and serves as a bridge between "Resurgence" and its epilogue "I See Fire," before the start of whatever will come in Series III.
Chapter 1
"Pop! You awake yet?" Frank called up the steps of the Reagan family home on Harbor View Terrace in the Bay Ridge section of Brooklyn early one morning in mid-June as he leaned down and added his briefcase to the small grouping of luggage assembled next to the front door. "My detail will be here in a couple of minutes to take me to the airport. Are you sure you have everything you need for the next few days? I just noticed your pillbox on the counter in the kitchen looks like it needs to be refilled. Did you call in all your prescriptions? You do know that I won't be back from the Commissioner's IACP conference in Seattle until late Saturday night, right?"
"Yes, on all counts, Mrs. Worrywart," Henry gruffed without even trying to conceal a frown as he slowly made his way down the steps from his room and past his son without further acknowledgment while dressed in his pajamas, robe, and slippers with hair still rumpled from sleep. "And I'm sure you've put the kids on the usual schedule to come check on me," he noted with irritation reminiscent of a teenager looking forward to the freedom of a weekend home alone only to have that squashed by overbearing parents. "For your information, I went to the pharmacy yesterday to pick up the order, but it wasn't filled yet because they were still waiting for a delivery. Jamie said he would stop by tonight on his way home from 1PP and get it since he was going there for the baby's drops anyway, and I'm headed over to the house after breakfast to help Eddie with my great-grandson and Kaylin while he and Eva are both at work. I've got enough pills for today," he asserted. "I might be old, but I can still get around and take care of myself!"
"Alright, I'm sorry I brought it up," Frank conceded to the grumpy older man with a nod and a relieved sigh as he acknowledged the fact that the problem had apparently already been addressed. Honestly, though he was more than a little jealous that NYPD business required him to be away for the rest of the week while his father was free to provide company for his daughter-in-law and youngest grandchildren since that baby boy and little girl were like a tonic for everyone's souls. "It's just that your cardiologist put you on that new medication last month and said it's important not to miss a dose once your body was used to it."
"And I won't," Henry insisted as he prided himself on still being sharp and independent even at his advancing age. "Since when have you known me to forget something like that? Do you want to worry? How about the weather on the left coast? You'll be lucky if your flight gets in on time from what I hear. Better pack your Wellies," he advised over his shoulder as he headed for the coffee maker. "Gonna pour cats and dogs every day out there this week."
"Well, lucky for me the conference is in the hotel, and I wasn't planning on any sightseeing," Frank rebuffed as he followed Henry back into the kitchen while waiting for his escort to arrive. The older they both got, the less he looked forward to these extended trips away from the city as the reality of leaving an aging parent alone in the sprawling household was never far from his mind. He could usually count on the rest of the family to pitch in and check on their grandfather during his absence which was made easier now with his youngest son living just a few blocks away in the old homestead. This time though Linda and Danny were preoccupied preparing for the imminent birth of the Marcus Beale baby which they were planning to adopt, and Erin was wholly embroiled in the investigation of an evidence tampering case with deep ties to her office. That left only a virtually housebound Eddie with a month-old baby Joseph home from the NICU ward for only for a few weeks now and Jamie who had just started back to work full-time in his new position as an FBI liaison for the NYPD legal department two days previously. Frank knew his youngest son was still coming up to speed with his recovery after the events of the past six months and injuries sustained after being struck by a car in Washington DC plus the later fall suffered at the bridge upstate when the situation with Mason Malevsky had come to a head, but he was counting on the forceful, magnetic pull of that new baby boy and a spirited three-year-old girl just up the street to assure himself of the fact that Henry would not be alone for any length of time while he was away. Still, for whatever reason, there was a heavier-than-normal feeling nagging at his heart this morning, and for a brief second, he seriously considered canceling the long-planned trip altogether.
"Francis, don't look now, but the Batmobile is already here," Henry noted with a glance through the living room window at the street as a familiar black SUV pulled up to the curb while he made his way to the front door to retrieve the morning paper. "You better get a move on it if you're still going," he added after noting his son's sudden reticence. "I'll be fine."
"Okay, Pop, I'll call this afternoon when we land," Frank finally gave in although he was still worried that his father looked a little more tired than normal that morning. "Love you. Promise to take care of everyone else for me," he added with an uncharacteristic lingering, affectionate hug for the older man before making his way out of the door and down the steps to the waiting vehicle with his bags already being retrieved by an ever-efficient member of the detail.
"Eh, wonder what's gotten into him, and where have I heard that before?" Henry pondered with a puzzled, raised eyebrow and half-wave as he watched them depart down the street before turning around to totter off on his morning mission which would include a short walk up to the familiar house on Driftwood Way where he and his beloved late wife had been at the start of their lives together here in this neighborhood over sixty years before.
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"Oh, for the love of all things under the stars of Heaven and earth, Henry, you can't be serious. It's certainly beautiful as you said, but much too pretentious for our needs now," Betty Reagan tutted softly in her once usual vim when he pulled their Studebaker up in the driveway of a home for sale in the heavily Irish populated Bay Ridge section of Brooklyn late one Sunday morning after church services were over. Although he expected precisely that response given the stately residential location which appeared well out of the reach of a newly promoted NYPD third-grade detective's salary, he was heartened to hear just a hint of that old lilt in her voice after the crushing silence that often permeated between them now since the loss of their beloved eighteen-month-old first-born son, Peter Christopher, soon after the little boy had been diagnosed with acute lymphocytic leukemia. An active and precocious child, he had gone from seeming normal and healthy to death's doorstep almost overnight as his small body was wracked with a sudden systemic infection. There had hardly been time to process what was happening and say goodbye before the greatest light the couple had ever known to that point was forever extinguished from their lives.
"Sweetheart, we talked about this," Henry encouraged gently as he reached over and took her hand. "A place like this is more than a house… it's an investment for our future. Your father left us a nest egg from his business when he passed, and instead of keeping it all in the bank for a rainy day, we could start over here where no one knows or constantly reminds us about what happened. We need that, Bet. I could request a transfer to the 1-9. There's room for me to move up the ranks in the department there and St. Victor's is close by if you wanted to go back to nursing. That nice Irish Catholic church we went to this morning is just a few blocks away. With your parents gone and now Peter... there's too many memories and ghosts left for us in Woodlawn Heights. It's time we leave the Bronx."
"I knew you had something on yer mind when you suggested this little drive, and I do not wish to move on or forget, Henry Reagan! Peter Christopher is not a ghost! He is my forever angel, and he rests with my mháthair and athair in the cemetery in Woodlawn!" Betty murmured with a determined emphasis on that place as her eyes filled while they took in the detailed architecture of the brick building before her. So many windows up there on that second floor could only mean multiple bedrooms—spaces she knew her husband desperately wanted to fill with more children someday, but for now, her heart was too broken to consider anything but the emptiness that was consuming it.
"I cannot leave him behind."
"He's not there, Betty… not really, but he'll always be here with us in our hearts," Henry tried to reason as he brought her wedding ring up to kiss it. The sight of his wife taking a daily trek to visit their son's grave for months on end now no matter the weather had been gnawing at his very soul, and he knew if he didn't do something drastic soon to break that cycle she would be lost to him forever too. "He'll stay close no matter where we go, but Peter would want more for his mother than sadness and crying over a headstone… he would want to be remembered with joy and happiness in your heart because that's what he brought us even if it was only meant to be for a short time. Maybe someday we can feel that again in a place like this," he consoled with a sad half smile. "There could be others and grandchildren after them. C'mon, what do you say, my love? Let's knock on that door and see if anyone's here to show it to us. I promise if it doesn't feel like somewhere we could call home forever we'll move on."
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"Pop! You're here early today!" Eddie's welcoming greeting broke through Henry's memories as he stood again on the front porch of the house he had come to share with Betty all those years ago. Once inside that day she had quickly surrendered to its warm charms and the notion that this was indeed the place they were meant to share the rest of their lives together. A small look of peace had even played over her face after running her hand lovingly on the oak banister that still stood in the same place, now cherished by a third and fourth generation of their blood. Recalling that time, he could not help but smile at the familiar look of his granddaughter-in-law, even in her current obviously sleep-deprived, baby-stained, disheveled state, since her spunk so reminded him of a time long ago and a beloved wife who had shaken off the tragedy of the past and come to share the same spirit once more as they grew their family's roots in this very spot just as he'd hoped.
"Oh, c'mon in... you don't have to knock when I know you'll be walking over. Technically, you still own the joint," Eddie kidded as she opened the door wide and pushed back her uncombed hair while reminding him of the fact that he still held the mortgage for them as he had gifted the down payment to Jamie and his wife in an effort to keep the property in the family and provide a suitable home for Kaylin when the short-term new owners, the Peterson's, had passed. After Betty and Mary's deaths, Frank had somehow convinced his father to sell the house and move in with him a few blocks over on Harbor View when hip replacement surgery loomed. Now, it was back under the family name again though, and Henry couldn't have been more pleased than to see another one of those rooms upstairs filled when the newest Reagan, little Joseph Daniel, was welcomed home from the hospital a few weeks ago after an earlier than expected arrival and a bit of a surprise reveal during his birth. Unfortunately, that necessitated a doting Nagyanya's complete revamping of the nursery theme from the bright pink and pastel colors that had once adorned the walls in anticipation of another little girl instead.
"Sorry for the mess… I know it looks like a hurricane swept through, but Jamie and Mom both overslept and were running late for work, and then Kaylin was trying her best to help me fold the mountain of laundry this little spit up meister creates every day. Let me at least clear a spot for you to sit," she added while grabbing the half-filled basket from the coffee table.
"And where are my gg's?" Henry asked after a longer than usual pause to catch his breath following the walk over before trailing her inside while he looked eagerly around for his great-grandchildren. Suddenly though he found himself feeling disoriented as the room began to swim slightly in his vision and he was forced to lean heavily on that oak banister in the foyer as Frank's earlier warning about missing his medication came back into play while Eddie's back was turned, and she paused to pick up and fold a few swaddling blankets off the chair. One of those new pills had slipped from his hand and accidentally washed down the drain of the sink while he was filling a glass of water to take them with that morning, and without a refill handy he had decided to ignore that fact in his quest to come up here as early as possible. Surely one dose was nothing to worry over no matter what the doctor had warned about, he assured himself, and there was no reason to make a fuss now or call for a car to take him to the pharmacy when Jamie had already offered to do that later in the afternoon.
"Munchie's in the bassinet over here napping like a champ now of course since he refuses to stay quiet more than twenty minutes a time at night unless he's latched onto me… don't tell anyone, but I think Jamie's actually jealous of him for that. Kaylin's upstairs finally getting dressed," Eddie answered sleepily with a big yawn as she ran the tip of her tongue over gritty teeth before covering her mouth with an embarrassed grimace trying without success to recall the last time they might have been brushed as she failed to notice Henry's state at first while preoccupied with her own. "If you could watch them while I take a shower to feel like a human being again I swear I'll bow down and kiss your feet. I thought maybe we could walk to the park after he wakes up and nurses again since it's such a nice day. A little sun and fresh air would be good for us all, don't you think?... Pop?" she asked and then looked around expectantly when there was no reply forthcoming.
"POP!" she cried while dropping the blankets from her hand as the basket tumbled to the ground and everything else was forgotten before she ran over after noticing Henry sliding slowly down to sit heavily on the first step while the color was rapidly draining out of his face. "Oh no! What's wrong?!"
"Dizzy… can't stand… up… anymore," he managed to stutter out weakly while continuing a slow collapse backward as Eddie rushed to cushion his head as he fell sluggishly against the railing.
"POP POP! YOU 'ERE TO SEE ME!" Kaylin squealed happily at first from the top of the steps while half-dressed in just a plain white nightshirt and her cherished duckie jammies bottoms before catching on to the seriousness of the situation as the commotion downstairs had drawn her out of her room.
"Mommy! What wrong with 'im?!"
"I'm not sure, sweetie… don't get upset though; he's just not feeling well right now," Eddie answered more calmly than at first although she was finding it hard to take her own advice even as her first responder training kicked in on autopilot, and she recognized the greyish blue pallor of a cardiac event—fully aware that Henry had suffered a previous heart attack several years before at Thanksgiving. She quickly felt for a pulse which seemed fast and weak all at the same time while the baby began to stir at the shouting voices and joined in with a pitiful wail of his own from the bassinet next to the couch. "Kaylin, go back upstairs to the bedside table and get Mommy's phone for me... CALL DADDY NOW!" she ordered with her own heart racing before reaching over to the wall and hitting the medical emergency button on the alarm system which fast-tracked an immediate ambulance response and had come in handy already on more than one occasion since it was installed.
"Oh God! This isn't happening, not now! Hang on, Pop! Please!" she begged him softly as her tears were spilling over and falling on his shirt. "We all love you and still need you so much! Please, you just have to stay with us! I'm gonna have a bus for you here in no time!"
"I'm fine, sweetheart, now don't fuss. Take care of everyone else for me," Henry tried to assure in a familiar fashion even as he was lying back against the steps with his eyes closed and his mind drifting back to all those years ago when he had come home only to find his beloved Betty collapsed in this very same spot.
So many things seem to happen at the bottom of that staircase, don't they? Poor Henry. Next, Jamie receives word that his grandfather has taken suddenly ill, and he's forced to make some decisions about notifying the rest of the family before racing to join his frightened wife and children at the hospital.